u/Independent_Sign9083

It’s been three weeks since we spoke and I can still vividly recall the pleased noise you make right before I finish. It crosses my mind, often, without my permission or intentional recollection. It was always one of my favorite things about you.

Getting weak in the knees and trembling just thinking about it. What I wouldn’t give to feel your hands on my skin again.

Invite me back into your bed. It’s the one place we never had any problems. I know you miss my mouth.

Yours (always),

r

It finally hit me tonight that you really aren’t coming back. That I’ll never see you again. That I’ll never talk to you again. I want to tear my heart out of my chest so I don’t have to wait for however long it takes to stop missing you every minute of every hour of every day. It’s only been three weeks and I know it’s going to hurt for a long fucking time.

I know you won’t, but you know how to find me if you ever (by some miracle) want to see or speak to me again.

I’ll love you either way.

I opened our text chain a little while ago. Read that last long message. Read the texts you sent to check on me after you left. Typed a message to you that I will never send. Cried for the first time in two weeks. Deleted the message. Decided to put it here instead.

I miss you so much. Life feels pretty empty without you. I wish we could have figured things out. There's so much I still want to say to you but it feels like there's no point anymore. I wish you still wanted me in your life. I thought we were taking a step back, not that you were disappearing. I hate being in a world that you aren't part of.

I can’t be the one to do relationship repair this time. I’m sorry. It’s your turn. If you reach out, I promise I’ll answer and I’ll be less defensive this time.

After three years of friendship and two years of… whatever we were.

Now you’re just another car I’ll look for at every place I go.