I feel like I’m loosing my best friend because she got a boyfriend
Hey everyone! I’m just looking for some advice and honestly venting. I (F20) have been best friends with this girl (F19) for around 8 years now. We met in school and were inseparable ever since. I got into med school and she got into college in other city, so we took separate ways but remained in contact: talking daily, phone calls, visiting each other once or twice every month… We still had a strong friendship despite college, responsibilities, med school and adult life.
She had never fallen in love before, but in February of this year she started going out with a guy who she fell head over heels for. She was always talking about him and is obsessed with him, and I don’t find nothing wrong with that! She met a guy, they clicked and she’s happy, so I’m happy. Problem is, she has been glued to that man ever since they met. She came to see me and brought him with her, and the last time I went to see her, he was there with us the whole time.
The real issue happened yesterday. In my hometown there are two very specific and important holidays: one in the beginning April and other one on late May (this weekend), and even though I tried to make her come here to see me and the group of friends, she couldn’t make it on April’s holidays. She said she was really worried about incoming exams and college, so even though I was disappointed, understood her situation (I’m in med school myself. I know a thing or two about academic stress) and asked her if we could lock in academically together during the month of April so that we could see each other on May’s holidays, and she said yes.
Honorable mention: on April’s holidays she spent the days at her boyfriend’s. Just throwing a really interesting fact there…
This past week I’ve been sending her train options, bus options and all sorts of schedules so that she could make it and come see me and our friends this weekend, but yesterday, after telling me that she’d come, she cancelled because “she was really stressed with college”. I would understand, because I am myself incredibly anxious about incoming finals too, but this past weekend and week she has spent everyday with her boyfriend. Now I get it: she just started the relationship, she’s happy and all, but I feel like she didn’t put in the effort to make it on May’s holidays and come see me after she cancelled once and promised me to come.
I feel left behind because I’ve been studying like crazy so that we could be together, and she’s over there prioritizing her boyfriend and time with him over our compromise.
I told her it hurt me and explained it very politely, and she got slightly mad at me. I told her I’m going to miss her this weekend and she hasn’t even replied to my message yet. It’s been over 24hr since I sent it.
I feel like I’m loosing her over this boy and I can’t even recognize her anymore. It’s really sad and I don’t know what to do.