u/Infinite_Share990

When my husband and I were dating, he moved in with me. I live in a very conservative area and he was the first very liberal man i have dated. I remember thinking and saying to him that i'll have to lock him up, because girls my age are gonna love him. This was just a joke, but it has a truth to it. My husband still doesn't understand why I said that and we recently had a conversation with friends and all the men had no idea what I meant. The women on the other hand completely got it.

My husband is and always has been handsome. But if you wanna be completely technical, he has average features. He is tall, a little pale and has dark hair. But there is something about him. For one, he grew up with ONLY women arround him. Lesbian moms, only sisters, literally no male family members. Then he is kinda quiet and always calm. He's very passionate in politics and very liberal. He admits if he doesn't know something instead of immediately forming an opinion.

I met him on a vacation with friends and I saw him helping a elderly woman carrying her cup of coffee up some stairs. When he came back to the house we had rented, he didn't even mention that. He didn't know I saw him but he didn't brag about it or anything. That might be normal but.. this made me see him in a different light.

It's his compassion and his empathy that makes him such a attractive person. People notice that. Yet he and every other man we know wouldn't catch that as a thing that attracts women. They seem to have no idea.

My husband said "why would I be so attractive to people? just because i'm tall?" and then proceeds to explain he doesn't workout, got a little belly since we married and doesn't really have a desire to have children.

My dude. THIS IS WHY. You love to eat, you love what I bake and you are aware of what it would mean to raise children and aren't totally fixated on it, expecting me to do all the work. He drove a friend home last month when she wasn't feeling well, came back a little late and proceeded to show me the pictures of her kittens he just met.

EDIT: Just for some context I told him there are barely any not conservative men in this area, so if word gets out that he is not only liberal, but tall, respectful AND knows how to eat pussy, i'm gonna have to beat the ladies off with a stick or lock him up. It was a joke. The men commenting that I wouldn't have given him a second look if he wasn't tall - y'all proved my point.

My husband doesn't believe this is a thing because he has never heard of it. I said just because the women in his life (coworkers, neighbors, friends etc) don't talk to him specifically about this, doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

Has this ever happened to you? Did any doctor ever not listen to you or shrug something off as a minor problem? What did it end up being?

I am looking for your experiences as I now am confused if I'm wrong about this. My husband is convinced I am taking this wrong. I think this is not that uncommon. My sister when into the ER with symptoms of a heart attack and they didn't check anything but said she was having a panic attack. When she was about to leave, she dropped to the floor. She survived barely.

Meine Mutter glaubt sie wäre ein Genie wenn sie mir sagt, dass ich nachts lüften soll, als würde ich daran nicht zuerst denken.

Die einzige Wohnung die ich in meiner Stadt gefunden habe die ich mir leisten kann ist eine Dachgeschosswohnung. Bisher war es erträglich, wenn ich mich so wenig wie möglich bewege. Ich nehme im Moment ein Antidepressivum ein.

Ich weiß nicht was heute anders war, außer dass ich meine Periode habe und blute wie ein angestochenens Schwein. Bereits 9 Uhr hab ich mich hundeelend gefühlt. Schwach, schwindlig und übel. Ich hatte frei und konnte noch ein bisschen schlafen, aber es hat nicht geholfen. Die Blutung war außergewöhnlich stark und ich habe Wasser getrunken so viel ich konnte, aber dann bin ich im Badezimmer einfach umgekippt. Danach war mir so übel dass ich Schwierigkeiten hatte Wasser bei mir zu behalten. Ich habs einfach immer wieder versucht. Mir gings so elend dass ich in Erwägung gezogen habe ins Krankenhaus zu fahren, aber ich konnte kaum aufstehen. Ich habe einfach mit einer Wasserflasche im Badezimmer gelegen bis mein Freund heimkam und sich erschrocken hat weil ich weiß wie eine Wand war. Ich stand so neben mir dass ich nicht mal irgendwo anrufen konnte. Aber langsam wirds besser. Der Tag war fürn Arsch. Ich weiß dass Antidepressiva die Temperaturregulierung beeinflussen aber meine Fresse.

UND DANN SAGT MEINE WERTE FRAU MAMA DASS ICH EINFACH DIE VORHÄNGE MORGENS ZUZIEHEN SOLL.

Die Tipps gegen Hitze haben sich in den letzten 50 Jahren kaum verändert also JA. ICH HABE DIE VORHÄNGE ZUGEZOGEN. ICH LÜFTE NACHTS. ICH BIN DOCH NICHT BESCHEUERT. ABER ES HILFT NICHT.

I (25f) have been with my husband (31m) for 3 years now. I wanna make it very clear that I love him with all my heart and he is the most loving and intelligent man i have ever met.

When I got to know him I knew he's a gamer. This is just his hobby and I never had a problem with that. In fact, in prior relationships my exes had issues with me being such a homebody. So meeting a gamer that also likes to stay at home was perfect. Everyone has hobbies, and this is his. I really like to read and crochet. So in our freetime we either play games together or each do our own thing but in the same room. sometimes i read in the bedroom and he's playing games in the living room and we check on each other from time to time.

He has ADHD, so there's a couple things we had to figure out. For example, when he's at his desk and I walk into the living room he immediately loses focus and thinks i'm approaching him, even if i just walked in to get something. So he takes off his headset everytime and looks at me like I asked him something, which I didn't. We have talked about it and he explained that he just immediately gets distracted and also doesn't wanna ignore me if I came to check on him. So he stops his game everytime I walk in, but I often times just come to fetch my water bottle and don't approach him. We agreed that if I wanna talk to him or if I needed something, I will touch his shoulder, if I don't touch his shoulder he doesn't need to stop his game. This is to minimize the distractions and to help his frustrations relating to his adhd.

Now to the problem. I don't have a problem with him playing video games. I like my me time.

However, I have a problem with him playing competetive online games. These games cannot be paused. He hasnt ever played these games until a few months ago. Right now it's the only thing he's playing.

I know immediately he's playing online again because he's very tense, stares at the screen and doesn't seem to blink. Since he started this, his behaviour changed. I have always avoided to approach him too much when he's gaming, just because I'm a yapper and can't stop talking and I also wouldn't like it if he constantly talked to me while I'm reading. So I only directly approach and talk to him if it's important.

So I only approach him to ask what I should make for dinner and if xyz would be okay, or to ask if he fed the cats so we don't feed them twice, and he reacts annoyed. He looks at me extremely annoyed and his tone gets irritated. The words are okay, but in combination with his tone it seems like i'm bothering him. Just imagine the most frustrated and annoyed tone while saying "i don't care, pasta's fine" or "YES I fed them"

If I get confused and hurt about the way he's talking to me, he will get even more annoyed because he can't pause the game and has no time to argue with me.

Basically this has created a dynamic where I completely avoid the living room. We have talked about it and he doesn't seem to realize what his face and tone does, he thinks he's acting normally. He told me not to take it personally.

Mind you, this does not happen with any other games. Only online games.

We have adopted two cats from the local animal shelter and are still working on building trust with them. Their last owner was a man and both cats have already laid on my husbands lap a couple times, tho I didn't get that lucky yet.

Yesterday, for the very first time, one of our cats fell asleep on my lap. Pure bliss. I am so blessed. They have had a hard time adjusting to their new home. After the cat left again, I went to the living room excitedly and told me husband "MILO SLEPT ON MY LAP JUST NOW" and he looked at me like i'm bothering him and said "yea he did that with me like 3 weeks ago"

I might be overreacting but this killed my mood. I know Milo already laid on my husbands lap. Which is exactly why i'm so happy he now also trusted me enough to fall asleep on me. I don't know if this makes any sense, but even tho I love my husband, I just don't like who he is when he's playing online games. He's like a completely different person and I can't stand him. I catch myself thinking that if he can't act like a person while gaming then he shouldn't fucking play these games.

These questions (i.e asking about dinner and feeding the cats) can't be avoided because his sessions go for many hours into the night. I'm talking 10 hours sometimes. I need to make sure he eats, so I need to know what he wants to eat. Otherwise he won't eat and he will lose weight, and it will affect his health. He's really tall and has a fast metabolism. Yes, I could do many things to walk on eggshells arround him, but as much as I wanna work this out and find a way to resolve this, I also wish he would put some more effort in. Otherwise I will build my whole life arround his bad moods and this is not the marriage I wanna have.

i am so sick of it.

6 years I didn't drink alcohol and now I am so close to pouring myself a glass of the wine I got my mother for mothers day.

I, 24f, have been responsible for birthday, christmas and mothers day gifts for our mother since i can remember. I have two brothers, 20 and 22. I also have a dad. For whatever reason this was my job. I didn't ask for that. But nobody else would do it and I loved my mother too much to not get hee gifts. But that just made everyone of my male family member completely rely on me for that. Even my father, since I was fucking 10 years old.

now that everyone is grown up and we all have moved out from home, i started letting them do some of the work. I would secretly buy gifts for my mom and not tell anyone. they would sometimes get gifts last minute, but mostly show up to her birthday, acting like my gift was from everyone.

2 weeks ago we planned to surprise her this year with a bunch of gifts and breakfast together. we're planning to show up unannounced tomorrow, she's gonna love it.

I ordered her things to make sour dough bread and a heated blanket, and I asked my brothers to get her favourite wine and flowers. They were fine with that.

I woke up from my nap at 4pm today to 3 missed calls. I assumed they didn't know what wine to get, fair enough, but instead they said they were too busy and asked if I would get the wine.

I don't know if i'm overreacting. I am so sick of this shit.

I asked these fuckers 2 WEEKS AGO to get the wine. And, granted, they had to get the flowers today. Is that too much to ask for? Can you not do one fucking thing?

Also, we have literally the best mother in the world. She loves mothers day. She loves gifts. Do you not fucking care about her? I know it isn't that deep. It's not about the money or the time it takes to get wine and flowers. But it's the principle. Like put some effort in.

I called my dad and he threw every excuse at me he could think of. "it's not their fault, they're busy", are they tho? they could have bought a random plant weeks ago, leave it at their home until it's mothers day. They could have gotten the wine in every grocery store.

And my mother kind of knows about this over the years and in no way does this change her mind about my brothers. I'm trying so hard to show her my love and she sees it. they don't give a shit and not for one second is she disappointed. Last year she told me "that's just how men are"

I am sick of their unreliability. I am sick of their carelessness. I am sick of my parents making up excuses for them. They need to do better, period.

Update: Thanks for all the responses. I wanna add that I did let them fail multiple times over the last years, did not get them back up and let them stand there without gifts. We legit all stood there on her birthday with nothing on our hands. It was uncomfortable as shit. I would later give my mom a present and express that it was just from me. What makes me mad is that, whatever I do, it doesn't matter. She does not see her sons in a different light. She doesn't get sad about them not caring. But I know for a fact that she would get mad at me if I did the same thing. And that is what it is at the end of the day.. it's unfair. Women and men have such different expectations put on them.