u/Internal_Heart7066

Hey guys, I only recently found out about this recently and a lot of the topics shared here match me quite a bit. I'm a 20 year old male and I'm a bit confused about myself. I have never been interested in sex or relationships for that matter. At first it never bothered me, but as I grew older it started to become more of a problem (to others) that I've never entered a relationship. Although I'm not repulsed or adverse to sex, it's not like I wouldn't want to try it out atleast once. My desire for these things have always been non existent since I was young. However, I have been dealing with depression since I was 10 or 11 which I know can lower your sex drive. Idk, anyone else in the same boat or similar? I'd like to know your thoughts.

I scored 115 on the Core cognitivemetrics test and 131 on Mensa Norway. Why is there so much discrepancy between the two? While I did mess up like two questions I absolutely knew the answer to on the Core test, why is the score difference so large?

I'm 20 years old as stated before. I only recently found out I'm gifted and came to this subreddit to find like-minded people. I spent years trying to find out why I felt so different and I guess I know now. But this doesn't change the fact that I'm struggling with depression, I have no job, I live with my mom, I've never had a desire to date, and I'm still trying to redo my old high school courses.

All I have left is my one last physics course and I would've been done. But I just had to get myself hospitalized to prevent my su*cide. Now I've dropped out of the last course I needed for university and successfully wasted another year of my life. Axiomatically by now I should be much further ahead in my life. Instead I'm taking medication daily which is causing me to gain weight and now I even hate the way I look.

I'm supposedly so smart yet certain math subjects in a grade 12 course and physics course confuse me, I'm told it's because my abstract thinking is much higher along with my spatial reasoning and that I'll do much better in university, but I can't even do that much as I'm still stuck in high school courses because I'm too tired to try.

Is there anyone who can help slightly by telling me what I should do? Even just one response because I'm so lost, and I don't think I'm living this life properly.