u/InternationalFig4340

How do I tell my best friend, that I can’t afford her second hen do, and I’m the MOH.

I’ll try and keep this fairly nondescript. I’m MOH for my best friend. When we first started discussing hen dos, I was aware there would be two. A “day event” for a larger group, and a long weekend abroad for a smaller, more intimate group.

The “day event” is now a long weekend abroad, with 15+ invited, at a cost of £400 without flights. That’s just accommodation and two activities. I’ve already paid the deposit for this.

The original long weekend abroad, is still a long weekend abroad, but when it was originally talked about, it would be a very relaxed affair with max 4 of us. It’s now 8-10, and has become a full blown second hen do, which I found out from another bridesmaid that she wants it to be a complete surprise. Again, looking at around £500 for just flights and accommodation.

I cannot afford both of these hen dos. I’ve already paid the deposit for the first hen, purely because it was arranged first. I feel SO guilty that I can’t afford to go, especially because she’s my best friend and I’m MOH. I desperately don’t want to upset her, but equally I’m not going to put myself under financial stress.

As the title suggests, really.

I’m trying to brighten up the otherwise very sterile looking office.

Nothing too big or small. I’ve already assumed I will be the primary caregiver, but equally nothing too needy and fairly easy to care for?

Thank you!

I know this is very much a “how long is a piece of string” question.

My boyfriend and I are both a bit type A when it comes to planning and finances, so are already planning ahead for a (hopefully) 2028 wedding.

In rough figures, what did your wedding cost? If you had a “normal” wedding. By that I mean, you weren’t intentionally trying to do it on a tight budget that was all DIY, but equally you weren’t dropping £20k on venue alone.

Thanks!

We’re looking at introducing gift cards at work for things like birthdays, work anniversaries, and employee of the month.

I’m curious what people would actually want and use, there’s no point giving something that just ends up forgotten in a drawer or lost on an email.

Same goes for any other small perks that have bigger impacts tbh.

Edited to add, because I naively thought this wouldn’t get that much traction lol. Not that it matters, but there seems to be the assumption this is the only perk we give out 😂We already give: annual pay rises, an additional day of annual leave for each year of service, Christmas bonuses.