u/Iron-Wild-41

I get 1000s of likes, dozens of matches (im picky, could be way more) and only a few of them convert to actual dates. Im top 1% profile.

Maybe 10% of matches to dates. The others drop off/go quiet before we can make plans.

My theory is even if the average joe schmo started getting dozens of likes, unless they are extremely desperate and matching 3-4/10s, they probably wouldn't get many dates from it unless they are the very top. They also wont habe abundance mentality and the girl is likely to sense their desperation on the date which presents a whole other set of issues we dont have to get into here.

Curious for guys in the top 10%, whats your experience?

My female friends who have been on dating app dates recently told me there is a big trend of men facetuning their faces as of the past year or so recently.

Whats your experience been?

Women generally can’t distinguish between narcissism and confidence nearly as well as they pretend or as well as their brothers and fathers.

If you actually sat down and ran through hundreds of specific examples.. social situations, dating interactions, leadership behaviors, flirting styles, status displays, boundary setting, self-promotion, emotional detachment, etc., most women would be wildly inconsistent in what they label “confident” versus “narcissistic.”

A lot of the judgment is heavily outcome-based:

- attractive/successful/popular person = “confident”

- unattractive displaying similar traits = “arrogant,” “narcissistic,” “compensating”

Not saying narcissism personality disorder isn’t real.. Just that people (mainly women) overestimate their ability to identify it from surface-level behavior alone.

Men are usually much better at distinguishing the two because sexual attraction clouds the evaluation process for women. Extreme confidence is relatively low on the list of "must-have" traits men look for in women, so men are less likely to reinterpret arrogance as attractiveness in the same way. This error in judgment leads to many unsuccessful relationships for women.