u/JT_Sparvalicious

My jaw hit the floor and I said "That's fucking insane." So I knew i had to share it hear. Sorry if yall have seen this already.

I am so, so tired. Not the "i need a good night's sleep" kind of tired. Mentally and emotionally tired. It hit me really hard on my way home from work today. It was like I was suddenly carrying the weight of ten tractor tires on my shoulders. I am tired of pretending to be ok, tired of hiding the pain, tired of being "fine", just tired. I dont want to be here anymore. I am tired of being told "everything will be ok", its not ok. I am tired of being given the standard, cliche answers to everything. I am tired of having to fake my way through life. I am tired of holding back everything I want to say. I am so, so, tired. I am tired of feeling like I am alone in my struggles. Tired of people saying they understand, they dont. Tired of getting out of bed everyday. I am tired of not being able to motivate myself. I feel like I am standing on a cliff, I either need to jump or walk the other way. Half of my life its been this way, does it ever get better. Will I ever feel like myself again. Truthfully I dont know know what myself would feel like. I am ready to give up. I just dont want to exist anymore....