u/Known_Sign3198

Background:

1988-2000: Immigrated to Canada. My parents are true grinders and built a great life for me.

2000-2011: My family moved back to China, and I graduated from one of the top colleges there.

2011–2019: I moved back to Canada and built a career. I'm 31M, living in Canada with my stay-at-home 31F wife and our two toddlers. I'm making around $180K a year. Then COVID hits. I get laid off, but I've saved around $400K.

My parents suggest that we move back to China and see how things go.

2020–2024: COVID lockdowns in China are brutal. My wife starts working full-time in a different city, leaving me to take care of the kids. I work remotely and make around $60K a year, enough to cover our basic expenses.

It's extremely stressful. I start cheating on my wife with escorts.

2025–2026: I'm 38. My wife finds out I've been cheating and wants a divorce and custody of the kids. I give her all my savings and promise I'll change.

I don't.

I'm not making enough money, so I decide to work for my father. He runs a "successful" real estate development company and is thrilled that I'm finally ready to "take over."

After working there for a year and going through the numbers, my projections show that the company will go bankrupt in two years. I'm fairly confident in my calculations.

My father doesn't believe me.

Now I'm stressed as shit. For myself, and for the 400 employees working for us. I know what it's like to get laid off.

So here I am.

I'm working full-time while raising two kids with some part-time help. My wife works in another city and is only home about seven days a month.

I still cheat on her with escorts.

I'm stressed and lonely almost every day. I'm basically an expat and don't have the time or actually friends to connect with.

Then my body starts breaking down.

A tumor grew in my head and I had it removed this year. I get tired easily now, but I still work 10–12 hours a day.

I love my kids, and they love me too. To them, I probably look like a model father. I go to all their school events. I read to them every night. I take them on summer vacations. I'm always there for them.

But I don't know how I'm supposed to face them someday, when they find out their dad was a broke, cheating mess who couldn't get his shit together.

I love my wife. I wish she were here with me every day. How should I ask her to forgive me when I come clean?

I'm ready to be judged like shit, and I don't care.

Background:

1988-2000: Immigrated to Canada. My parents are true grinders and built a great life for me.

2000–2011: My family moved back to China, and I graduated from one of the top colleges there.

2011–2019: I moved back to Canada and built a career. I'm 31, living in Canada with my stay-at-home wife and our two toddlers. I'm making around $180K a year. Then COVID hits. I get laid off, but I've saved around $400K.