u/Lalaboballa

My neighbor 77 recently faced a utility shut-off due to an $800+ sewer bill. To assist, I 60 provided access to showers and hauled water for her daily needs.
**The Boundary Conflicts**
I established specific times for shower and water access to protect my routine, as I manage a brain injury and utilize a weekly caregiver. My neighbor consistently ignored these boundaries, attempting to force schedule changes.
Further complications arose regarding communication and transportation:
**Communication:** Her phone service was disconnected, eliminating our primary means of contact.
**Transportation:** I provided gas money for her vehicle (with expired tags) to facilitate occasional transportation for me. However, I found her driving to be hazardous—frequently running red lights and stopping in active traffic to text. Due to these safety concerns, I ceased relying on her for rides.
**The Escalation**
The relationship deteriorated further when she demanded a spare key to my home, which I denied to protect my personal space. She responded with aggression, accusing me of distrust.
When I shared plans to purchase a new property with a shop that could be converted into a guest house, she immediately declared that I should rent it to her and provide for her care. I declined, noting my desire to keep that space available for my own family. When I attempted to discuss these issues calmly, she responded by screaming at me and claiming I had hurt her feelings.
**Professional Concerns**
The neighbor claims to be a social worker with professional access to other vulnerable adults. Her pattern of disregarding boundaries, aggressive verbal behavior, and attempted financial manipulation raises significant concern regarding her interactions with her clients. If she is willing to coerce me, she may be leveraging her position to exploit or manipulate other vulnerable individuals who may have less capacity to defend themselves.
**Current Status**
I have chosen to sever ties with this neighbor. While I am aware of her current difficulties—including lack of utilities, transportation issues, and limited resources—her refusal to respect my boundaries and her aggressive behavior have made it impossible to continue assisting her. I have maintained these boundaries firmly, recognizing that my disability does not impair my ability to protect my interests and my home.
**AITAH**

My neighbor 77 recently faced a utility shut-off due to an $800+ sewer bill. To assist, I 60 provided access to showers and hauled water for her daily needs.
The Boundary Conflicts
I established specific times for shower and water access to protect my routine, as I manage a brain injury and utilize a weekly caregiver. My neighbor consistently ignored these boundaries, attempting to force schedule changes.
Further complications arose regarding communication and transportation:
Communication: Her phone service was disconnected, eliminating our primary means of contact.
Transportation: I provided gas money for her vehicle (with expired tags) to facilitate occasional transportation for me. However, I found her driving to be hazardous—frequently running red lights and stopping in active traffic to text. Due to these safety concerns, I ceased relying on her for rides.
The Escalation
The relationship deteriorated further when she demanded a spare key to my home, which I denied to protect my personal space. She responded with aggression, accusing me of distrust.
When I shared plans to purchase a new property with a shop that could be converted into a guest house, she immediately declared that I should rent it to her and provide for her care. I declined, noting my desire to keep that space available for my own family. When I attempted to discuss these issues calmly, she responded by screaming at me and claiming I had hurt her feelings.
Professional Concerns
The neighbor claims to be a social worker with professional access to other vulnerable adults. Her pattern of disregarding boundaries, aggressive verbal behavior, and attempted financial manipulation raises significant concern regarding her interactions with her clients. If she is willing to coerce me, she may be leveraging her position to exploit or manipulate other vulnerable individuals who may have less capacity to defend themselves.
Current Status
I have chosen to sever ties with this neighbor. While I am aware of her current difficulties—including lack of utilities, transportation issues, and limited resources—her refusal to respect my boundaries and her aggressive behavior have made it impossible to continue assisting her. I have maintained these boundaries firmly, recognizing that my disability does not impair my ability to protect my interests and my home.
AITAH