An article said you need at least 22$ an hr to make it in Saskatoon. I want to know what the people here do to get by in this city. Do you side hustle? forced to be a part timer? Is your work industrialized?
Everytime I show up (I’m from northern sk) I end up losing my job and I’m forced to move back home.
Disclaimer I am diagnosed with bipolar I with psychosis but the older I get the more I’m starting to believe it’s something else. I am well medicated now and I’m stable.
So… I was living in this hotel and I would hear the voice of my ex coming from upstairs (he was very open about his interest in the occult) and the voice would say things only he would know. I made a complaint to the front desk and they told me no one had been in that room for months due to the refrigerator being out of order. It made things worse because I would hear doors opening and closing, people smoking and taking bong rips etc. then I would go outside and it would be completely quiet.
This strange thing happened: I would DM popular/famous people and then use my intuition to predict what they might think and eventually I began hearing their voice and sensing their presence from different corners of the room with each part/direction in the room having a correspondence like… the northwest corner, the north wall, the west window, the bathroom fan which was in the east. I never put anything in the south room because that’s where I heard evil spirits.
Inside the mirror there were spirits as well. Some of famous people and some of dead people.
I’m fully aware this could be the effect of drugs but it was so vivid I had to put it somewhere.
A large theme was these spirits were trying to get me to not click clack myself and I was going through spiritual trials every night.
Even just speaking with the spirits was a type of trial ie determining if who I thought I was talking to was what I was actually talking to.
I even felt the presence of god(s) and goddesses
They would gently ask me (not command or direct/dexlare) to drink, dance, sing, write, etc. and I did. I was fully enveloped in this world.
I spoke to crows that were lost in the city. They sounded hungry and I told them to go back to the forest.
**But the strangest thing was this:**
I couldn’t sleep all night and this human spirit appeared to me. He was teaching me how to swim. His presence moved from the northwest corner/window into the mirror in the bathroom where we spoke for a while.
Then, knowing this was all a bad symptom, I looked out the large window in the south… that morning (I stayed up all night talking) and I saw the spirit that appeared to me in the dream. He was a very tall man in a beige suit with curly hair.
The weird thing was he waved at me through the window, with his left hand, and then walked into the hotel.
This became unmanageable and I was hospitalized. I am now heavily medicated/sedated 24/7 and I stopped smoking weed.
But can i be honest?
I didn’t stop hearing the voices… I just stopped acting like I did…
They’re very faint now…
But to be honest I really miss the high stakes conversations I would have with these people.
Idk.
I’m just a crazy girl
Weed and alcohol mostly but I’ve been using heavily for ten years and only just quit yesterday. Everything’s hitting me now that I’m actually sober. I have no friends, my mom hates me. She even said herself she doesn’t like me. I’ve always been too intense or too much for people and I don’t know why. I wanted to die before I was sober I still want to die (this is not my first attempt at quitting). I was supposed to be a nurse or a music teacher then I kept getting abused and I got assaulted. Couldn’t finish school, would have flashbacks at the drop of a hat.
I get psychotic episodes but I don’t really like to talk about them because people get judgemental.
I’ve always thought I had bipolar but it might just be the drugs
I know for a fact tho I didn’t get enough hugs as a kid lol. The thick ass scars across my body are proof of that.
I spent the whole day in pain crying. My body just aches everywhere nothing feels good and the whole world is flat.
I can’t talk to anybody. I live in a desolate shithole. I don’t have a job. No vacancies in my town. Everything is hopeless n I just wanna die tbh.
I don’t care anymore
Weed and alcohol mostly but I’ve been using heavily for ten years and only just quit yesterday. Everything’s hitting me now that I’m actually sober. I have no friends, my mom hates me. She even said herself she doesn’t like me. I’ve always been too intense or too much for people and I don’t know why. I wanted to die before I was sober I still want to die (this is not my first attempt at quitting). I was supposed to be a nurse or a music teacher then I kept getting abused and I got assaulted. Couldn’t finish school, would have flashbacks at the drop of a hat.
I get psychotic episodes but I don’t really like to talk about them because people get judgemental.
I’ve always thought I had bipolar but it might just be the drugs
I know for a fact tho I didn’t get enough hugs as a kid lol. The thick ass scars across my body are proof of that.
I spent the whole day in pain crying. My body just aches everywhere nothing feels good and the whole world is flat.
I can’t talk to anybody. I live in a desolate shithole. I don’t have a job. No vacancies in my town. Everything is hopeless n I just wanna die tbh.
I don’t care anymore