u/MembershipOutside936

I’m considering filing a separate child support modification based on a substantial change in circumstances rather than trying to address child support as part of an upcoming plenary hearing that already involves several other disputed issues.
The non-custodial parent lost his job approximately 8 months ago and remains unemployed. Since then, I have been covering essentially all of our daughter’s expenses, including her day-to-day needs, school tuition, aftercare, extracurricular activities, and health, dental, and vision insurance.
Our existing order requires him to maintain medical insurance for our daughter and reimburse me for medical expenses I pay over $250. Since losing his employment and insurance coverage, I have taken over those expenses as well.
There are also questions regarding his request to receive a child-support credit for another child he says he had last year. As far as I am aware, no documentation establishing paternity or information concerning the other parent has been provided.
Another issue is financial disclosure. He has not provided his W-2, the complete separation/severance documentation from his previous employer, or what I believe to be a complete and accurate CIS. Those documents could obviously be relevant to determining his actual income, severance, unemployment benefits, assets, and ability to contribute.
Because our plenary hearing already involves multiple unrelated issues, I’m wondering whether it makes more sense to file a separate child support modification based on changed circumstances and have the financial issues addressed on their own.
For anyone familiar with New Jersey family court:
If the non-custodial parent has been unemployed for approximately 8 months, what typically happens with support? Is support temporarily reduced, suspended, or can income eventually be imputed if the court determines the parent has the ability to work?
If the parent requesting a reduction has not provided complete financial disclosures, how does the court usually handle that?
Has anyone had a child support modification proceed separately while other post-judgment issues or a plenary hearing were pending? Did the court keep the support application separate, consolidate everything, or address support first?
What can I ask the court to do in regard to getting documents?

I’m trying to determine the cleanest way to have child support reviewed without adding another complicated financial dispute to an already extensive plenary hearing.
This is in New Jersey.

I’m fostering a 10-year-old Maltipoo and I’m so frustrated. The first couple of days he pooped all over the house and even peed on me. I walk him 3 times a day and make sure when I do late-night walks to make sure he’s gone before bed, I wake up to pee and poop all over the crate and all over him, and I have to wash both daily.

I’m beyond frustrated and I don’t know how to teach him not to go in the crate. I definitely don’t trust him loose in the house at night or while I’m at work.

I chose to foster because I really wanted to help, and I didn’t think this dog had been abused or neglected — he came from a home that seemed very fond of him. But it became clear he was neglected: at his first bath I saw sores and scratches on his back. He also seems very anxious and nervous, and any loud noise sets him off.

I need help. What do I do about the potty training?

Hi,
I am the primary residential parent and have once again been brought back to court. From my perspective, this litigation stems from the father’s desire to reduce or avoid his child support obligation, with the request for additional parenting time being presented as the basis for the modification.
As a result, I drafted a very detailed proposed parenting plan. I included provisions covering the parenting schedule, travel, procedures for future modifications, communication, decision-making, financial disclosures, and other areas where conflict has repeatedly arisen. My intention is not to change custody or restrict the father’s relationship with our daughter. Rather, my goal is to create a comprehensive agreement that can grow with our child, reduce future conflict, minimize the need for repeated court intervention, and protect both my daughter and me by clearly setting expectations.
My question is: Is a parenting plan with this level of detail viewed negatively by the court? Could it be perceived as excessive, or do courts generally appreciate detailed agreements that anticipate future issues, particularly where there has been an ongoing history of conflict?
I am also representing myself (pro se), so I want to make sure I am presenting something that will be viewed as reasonable and child-focused rather than overreaching.

UPDATE: Thank you for the feedback
I wanted to come back and give an update because, while it was honestly really hard to come here and ask these questions and then sit and read through all of the comments, I did take the feedback seriously.
Some people were incredibly kind and constructive. Others, not so much. But I guess that is also part of navigating family court. There isn’t much room for emotion. You have to develop resilience, separate how something makes you feel from what actually needs to be addressed, and keep moving forward.
The biggest thing I took away from everyone’s feedback is that my proposed 77 page amended parenting plan needs to be significantly reduced. I’m going to aim for roughly 5–10 pages, keep it direct, focus on the issues that actually need clarification, and leave out provisions that don’t absolutely need to be there.
I’m also going to document what happens—good or bad—rather than trying to anticipate and write a provision for every possible future situation. If something becomes a recurring problem, I will have the documentation to address it appropriately.
Probably the hardest realization from all of this is accepting that this may not be the last time I end up back in court. That’s incredibly sad to me because I genuinely wanted to create something comprehensive enough that we could stop litigating and simply raise our child. But I also understand now that a parenting plan cannot prevent someone from creating conflict or guarantee compliance.
I also want to clarify something because several people suggested using a parenting communication app. We already use OurFamilyWizard. But still the same things are happening.
My goal at this point is not to change custody through a 77-page document. I want to put forward a reasonable proposed consent order and amended parenting plan that addresses the issues raised through his motions and hopefully creates a path toward settlement.
And, for what it’s worth, there was already a rational part of me looking at those 77 pages thinking: Is a judge realistically going to want to read all of this? Is opposing counsel going to meaningfully work through it? And, most importantly, is either parent realistically going to follow something this long?
Our current parenting plan is already approximately 48 pages, and we still have disagreements over compliance. Making the next one even longer probably isn’t the solution.
So I’m taking the criticism, separating the constructive advice from the noise, and moving forward with something much shorter, clearer and more practical.
Thank you to everyone who took the time to give thoughtful advice—even when it wasn’t necessarily what I wanted to hear. I genuinely appreciate it.

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