u/Minute_Apartment1849

Hi everyone,

Has anyone experienced cognitive decline as a result of gamma knife radiation? I had mine in January of this year, and about 6 months later, I started noticing a real change in my memory and cognitive function.

I starting to forget very obvious things like how to do basic self-care activities, and important life admin things like passwords or PIN codes.

I am also sooooo tired in a way I’ve not felt for a long time. It’s becoming debilitating - I’ve taken a pay cut at work to reduce my demand, and am still barely getting through a work day. I’m also irritable and cranky from just being constantly confused and exhausted, and it’s affecting my marriage and relationship with my wife and daughter.

Does anyone know if this is potentially a result of radiation or something tumour related? My hormones are all within normal limits (except PRL), and my endo is pretty confident that it’s not hormonally driven.

Hey everyone, hoping to get some advice on reframing my relationship with myself and procrastination from people who understand the struggle.

I grew up in a household that was both unaware and intolerant of ADHD. What I now know were just my typical ADHD symptoms like procrastination and distraction were punished very severely as a kid, and I have a very poor relationship with myself as a result.

Because of a lot of significant life events, my old strategies of brute force working around my symptoms aren’t working any more, and my procrastination is getting worse and worse. I’ve gone from being a consistent over achiever at work to barely turning in anything useful. Because of this, my sense of self has taken a big blow.

The problem I have is that I need so much external pressure to get anything done, and spend 90% of my day doing meaningless tasks. I feel intense guilt, shame and depression the whole time I do this until it comes to crunch time where I get most of my work completed.

I’m really struggling with this right now. I’ve been this way as long as I can remember, but it’s starting to have real and serious impacts on me and I need to do something different.

I figure if I can stop torturing myself 90% of my day and just learn to accept that this is me, I will be on a path to just managing my way through.

Does anyone have any suggestions on acceptance methods or ways of dealing with being someone who can’t stop procrastinating?

Hey all, I'll try to keep my post as short as possible.

I've been slowly but surely preparing for the no contact stage with my family. It's been a really hard process, especially because I kept giving everyone more and more chances, but I think it's finally time. I've already severed ties with 2 sisters, and expect I'll lose relationships with everyone after this.

I had a recent conversation with my dad which became the final straw. I had suggested therapy with him and my mom after almost a year of trying to resolve problems caused by a family rupture. He agreed to it, but it felt forced and one-sided, as though he would only go to "make me happy".

This can all be summed up in 3 main issues:

1. Being diagnosed with ADHD at 27 - the anger and grief from years of mental torture, never fitting in, and failing in study and careers without knowing why. Finding out that if even just a few questions were asked, my entire life could have looked completely different (or even have just not been so hard).
2. Being diagnosed with a brain tumor, and receiving very little in the way of emotional support or validation from my immediate family. In fact, when I told my mom that my diagnosis and treatment had caused me to feel suicidal, she told me how unfair it would be that she might have to bury her own son.
3. Having my own child, and realizing I could never treat them the way I was treated. Especially physical abuse, and targeted sibling pile ons without any intervention.

When I've tried to raise any problems about the above issues, the response is immediately telling me all the things that I have done to make them angry or upset and why they were justified in what they've done. They sometimes just deny knowledge of anything happening, or tell me things happened differently to what I remember. All I have asked for is a sincere and genuine apology, but it never happens.

I can barely sleep or function most days. I have cPTSD and have lived with treatment resistant depression for almost 15 years. I spend most of my time feeling worthless, lonely, and feel I have very little to look forward to in life.

I am finally at the point that I see there being no relationship possible given what has happened and how I now see them. The part that has hurt the most was realizing that I'm not just losing the parents I was promised I had, but now losing the family I thought I had. My mom is very good at manipulating people's image behind their backs with weaponized concern. She's done it to other people with me time after time and now my family is acting very differently towards me out of the blue.

Does anyone have advice on how to deal with the anxiety of not knowing what has been said about me or what people might think?

How do you stop the constant thought spirals? I can't even sleep any more because of the constant rumination, and I am becoming angry and withdrawn from my own because I'm constantly in so much anger and distress. Any advice is welcome.