u/Miserable_Clue5243

I M29 married to my wife F28, 1.5 years back, and since then we had our differences. This might be a bit long sorry but I appreciate your honest opinion. Thanks.

2 years ago we had an arranged marriage and everything was fine until marriage. I was living in America and she was in back home Asia.

All in all, I struggled alone, got home ready, good job, car etc. thanks to god I had everything on track on my life before turning 26.

I do not blame her but just letting you know I have been through tough times and when I got Married she turned cold about everything upset on small issues and I tried hard but she keep find a way to make fight.

Initially all sorted out good, but slowly we had our biggest fight few months back where it was reached to divorce but I tried one more attempt.

So my issue is that before marriage we decided not having children until she complete her medical license exam in America and we had 2 years timeframe. Fast forward to this day, she has come to live with me but she is seems different person.

She wakes up late noon, not doing job to support, many times skip household chores, not picking calls of my family, left education like not needed- not even studying for exam a single day and when I bring issues up she start fighting.

When I was alone I used to travel so much in car but I stay home do job, pay bills, eating different times because she can’t wake up and not hungry, feeling alone until she wakes up and she stay late at night.

I tried, I really tried many times but she didn’t listen, her tomorrow never comes unfortunately where she become a real wife, roommate or a life partner.

It’s been 3 days and we don’t spoke like we used to, just important stuff. I am not saying I am perfect but she can just try once.

tl;dr wife is wasting biological time not getting kids, not focusing on career and sleeping all the times, and mean about her selfish behaviour.

I want her to focus on family (do kids) or career (job) but she is doing neither.

How do I explain and find proper solution?

"People don’t value what’s easily available"

I’ve been thinking about this for a while and want outside opinions.

Back in college, I was very focused on building a career in IT/cybersecurity. Before even starting post-grad, I already had around 2 years of experience, certifications, personal projects/blogs, and was actively learning.

Some of my friends were also interested and I encouraged them to study with me, train together, and focus on long-term career growth. But most of them prioritized part-time jobs and short-term income instead. (I did help with their college assignments too)

Fast forward a few years: I stayed consistent, worked hard, and now I’m doing work in my field. Meanwhile, some of those same friends are still working the same jobs from college and often complain about being stuck and not finding better opportunities in Canada.

The confusing part is that I’ve tried helping multiple times over the years. I’ve offered guidance, study plans, referrals, interview prep, and even at one point offered a friend free rent/food if they wanted to move in temporarily and focus on learning full-time.

Usually they seem interested at first, but eventually lose focus or come up with reasons they can’t continue.

So my question is: why do some people genuinely want change, but still resist help or avoid taking action? Is there a better way to support people like this, or do you eventually have to accept that people only change when they’re personally ready?

Technical Background:

-> VMware Fusion Professional 25H2u1

-> Mac Studio M4 Max Tahoe 26.4.1

-> 4 monitors: 3 via Plugable UD-ULTC4K dock (2×DP, 1×HDMI) + 1 direct HDMI

-> For context, my setup includes one Dell P2422HE monitor and two Samsung S24R65X monitors (connected via 2× DisplayPort and 1× HDMI to the dock). One ingnok via HDMI directly.

I have tried UTM and it works fine with 4 displays.

I’m running VMware Fusion (the new free version) on my Mac and using a Kali Linux (latest) guest for some ML/Security projects. I’m hitting two major issues when trying to use multiple displays:

1. Multi-Monitor Issue: Single screen full-screen works perfectly. However, when I select "Use All Displays in Full Screen," the displays just mirror each other and then the VM often freezes. It won't extend the desktop across my monitors.
2. Mouse Click Dislocation: My mouse cursor is completely offset. To click a button, I have to aim a few centimeters to the left or right. The offset seems to get worse or change depending on how close I am to the corners of the screen.(it works fine with the single screen)

What I’ve tried so far:

• Tried different guest OS versions, but the issue persists.
• Kali Display Settings → "Mirror Displays" cannot be unchecked (resets immediately)
• Accelerate 3D Graphics: on/off
• Retina resolution: on/off
• macOS display mirroring: off
• Kali: sudo apt full-upgrade, open-vm-tools, reboot
• All monitors same refresh (60Hz)

┌──(kali㉿kali)-[~]

└─$ xrandr --listmonitors

Monitors: 4

0: +*Virtual-4 1920/508x1080/286+0+0 Virtual-4

1: +Virtual-1 1920/508x1080/286+0+0 Virtual-1

2: +Virtual-2 1920/508x1080/286+0+0 Virtual-2

3: +Virtual-3 1920/508x1080/286+0+0 Virtual-3

Kali sees them as 4 separate outputs, but they all point to the same physical space. Kali cannot rearrange them because the underlying position is hardcoded by Fusion.

Anyone else hitting this on Apple Silicon + dock setups? Fusion bug or fixable guest config?

I solved 2 Linux and 2 windows, but struggled with the last one in AD set. Twice.

I have solved many labs on my own, having extensive experience in Pentesting(6+) but somehow I am afraid to go 3rd time. I am open to suggestions please.

So, Last year I had 2 attempts and in both I did found the solution for the third (probably but could not tried) but by the time I did, 24 hours times up. I didn't drink coffee or caffeine to stay awake, just water.

Now my company wants to sponsor me again for the 3rd time this year with 90-days lab access and I can't say no as it would disappoint them.

So I know all resources in the group but I would appreciate if someone can say what one or many things that actually changed their style and helped with this certification. It could be few things related to timing, who gave recently what materials is most useful besides the offsec labs, or realization of rabbit hole.

How would I divide the task in 90 days, focus on passing in this short time.

Thanks in advance 😄

Edit:
Thank you everyone for helping. I don’t have much friends after I moved to different country so couldn’t find the issue but talking with everyone seems I find the mistakes I took. Much appreciated your support.

So I have been having haircuts at a local shop and I want to try another barber, but I’m afraid, that will hurt him, with whom I get regularly, as I have been with that barber for the last few years.

Whenever I call, he is always there, so no option for me to say no to him directly, and if I say ‘I will have haircuts with another’, that will upset him 😅😂😂

Well, I don’t want to be rude, but has anyone tried this?
Sorry I know bit silly but… hope someone can suggest

Well, that will sound a bit odd, but when I received an ITA in March 2026, I got the field for the proof of fund. Now I am uploading all the documents, so I logged in and it just disappeared!

Well, I was invited under CEC, so I should not worry about it, and anyway, I was about to upload the LOE. However, now I find it awkward 😬 as it is. Other fields are still there, and I tried reloading, going back and forth, and all.

Is that happened with all? Or maybe they have updated the website! IDK 🤷‍♂️

I got my invitation on 17 March and deadline is on 16 May 2026.

So I sent my passport for renewal on 13 March before receiving the invitation and haven’t received. Based upon other people’s timeline I might not receive it anytime sooner!

Would it be okay to submit medical from 4.2 years old and old passport copy. And once I received new one I do medical and send with new passport.

I saw someone’s file got returned due to old medical!

I have (18 days) and passport is in dispatch so probably not come on time!

Please suggest it, Thank you.

Well, I don't have a massive or complex workflow like you all do, because I mainly create tutorial videos with very few nodes and edits.

However, thanks to this community and YouTube videos, I finally learned color grading and Fusion. I'm sharing my workflow for those who have just started and mainly rely on LUTs.

Don't be afraid of this. Once you learn proper color grading and animation, you'll never go back to LUTs. Instead, you'll enjoy experimenting with different settings.

https://preview.redd.it/u8w9irkubeyg1.png?width=1192&format=png&auto=webp&s=18f0260030f04c27b20e0839fd6b50caa228d731

Another same but different approach....

https://preview.redd.it/1on4x1ypfeyg1.png?width=629&format=png&auto=webp&s=c65084a5e546895e8dad8cf76ca6fae5c2dc2877

This is basic color grading I use in mostly all my videos. I do CST from SONY LOG3 to DaVinci Wide Gamut. Once I do all changes I want, I do another CST to Rec 709 and Gamma 2.5.

https://preview.redd.it/busmfedxceyg1.png?width=1439&format=png&auto=webp&s=57b570295e53362fd8d21419ddf50d9cadd40e27

I was using Blender for animation, but I didn't know that DaVinci Resolve has an easy option for it.

I hope this will be useful for beginners, as I was looking for the same workflow when I started, since I never had cinematic requirements or needed complex editing.

Thanks 😄