3 children with 3 different women
I was the first of three women to have a child with this man, the children are 13, 10, 2. Each time the relationship is great, we get pregnant, his whole demeanour flipped, and then around the 1-2 year mark he left the relationship and then demonizes us because we expect him to still support our child.
I was 22 when I became a single mom and have been dealing with him for a decade since the split. I have tried to be as reasonable as possible, he’s paid $500/m and never paid any child care fees, I even agreed to lower it when he was facing self proclaimed hardship… that he milked for 26 months when it was supposed to be 6-12, fought me when I told him he had to return to the $500 amount.
I didn’t choose for him to go and have 2 more children and then leave 2 more women; but any time I ask for an increase to support the cost of living increases and the fact that his income has tripled since we agreed to the amount, he claims that I will make him homeless, that that I need to be grateful for getting what I get since I don’t work for that money… tells me to stop reaching into his pockets and go get a better job if I want more money. Child care alone is more than the child support… in fact the $500 ordered in 2016 was less than the guideline amount but I was trying to work with him since he was starting a new family. In 2026 that $500 adjusted for inflation should be $658… not factoring in his current income.. which is even higher than what his taxes say because he doesn’t declare his self employment income.
I’m just ranting because I have tried so many times to work with him outside of court to come to an agreement but unless it’s exactly on his terms he won’t budge. He kept asking for one more year to get his stuff in order… and now it’s been 6 years and I’m over it. He tells me that he will involve our child in support conversations and let him know that I’m the reason why he’s angry, that I’m the reason why he’ll lose his home…. He made over $150,000 last year! I make a third of that. He has a new trailer, always upgrading his truck… just bought a house… he clearly isn’t going to be homeless.
The other two moms are in the same boat, but one of them is mad at me for considering court because then “it won’t be fair to their kid if they get less than mine”… so then they’d have to go to court but they’d get less because they’re remarried now. She knew about his responsibly to his first child before they chose to have theirs…. I’m just so frustrated.