u/MsRobinNL

We've started sleep training our 6mo boy/girl twins with ferber. We have the wake windows down pretty solidly (2/2.5/2.5/3) and cap naps at 3hrs. We have a very solid bedtime routine with a massage with a song and the first two Ferber nights they were pretty calm when we put them to bed and started crying about 3 minutes in (to be expected).

The first night boytwin slept after 20mins, girltwin after 15mins.

The second night boytwin slept after 15mins, girltwin after 25mins.

I was under the impression that it would usually get a little better by night 3, but this evening they both already started crying upon hearing the song during the massage at bedtime. Almost as if they knew what was coming. They were already inconsolable at bedtime and after some holding we decided to just put them in their cribs because we didn't want to undo the 'no rocking to sleep'. Today boytwin slept after 25mins, girltwin after 17mins.

Is it normal for babies to be so upset at bedtime on night 3? Do they "know" what's coming and protest harder? When will they most likely settle easier?

I also still feel like they're crying themselves to sleep, rather than actually learning to self soothe/settle. Anyone else that felt that way?

Overall we'll be staying consistent and I genuinely expected it to take longer from day 1, so I'm hopeful. Was just wondering what the experiences of others were like.

We're planning on starting Ferber next monday! I was wondering, is there anyone out there that made any significant changes to Ferber to fit their personal preferences/needs more? Such as differently timed check-ins, still picking up, staying longer, going in when they're not crying etc.

What did you change? Did it work or did you adjust it later?

I recently saw a video of a twin mom saying "We never let the twins compete each other. Rather, we make them compete the parents. Example: 'Who can reach the car quicker, mom or you guys?'"

I thought it was so cute and teaches the twins an 'us against the world' mentality. What are some things in your childhood that strengthened your bond with your twin?

I'm a FTM to 6mo fraternal boy-girl twins, but we have 0 pairs of twins on either side of the family, nor are we close to anyone who is or has twins, so I would love to hear all the experiences of twins and twin parents that I may not know!