r/sleeptraining

My 5.5 month old is somehow continually getting worse sleep. Around 2-3 months he was sleeping from 7-8pm ish til 3-4 am ish to eat consistently,( even got a few 8-6 nights) then would sleep til around 6 and eat again, and sometimes nap til 8-9. A week or so after he turned 4 months he started the frequent wakings more like around a 1 am wake up, then again around 4 and 6 roughly. That lasted a few weeks. Now over the past week he has gotten much worse. He gets put to bed between 7-8 pm, based on when he was wakes up from his final nap. Hes waking up within an hour of being put down, sometimes less that 20 min, and is absolutely screaming sobbing when he gets up. And that continues hourly all night long. No swollen gums or visible teething. He’s been doing the drooling and chewing everything for 2 months and no change in that. He’s passing gas easily at night.

He use to be easy to settle overnight. He would wake up, diaper change, eat, and go back down no tears. On bad nights, the second half of the night after the 3 am feed he would co sleep, but always make it the majority of the the night in the bassinet. Now even being held doesn’t help him sleep. He seems upset held and rocked, in his bassinet, or in my bed out of desperation. Nothing is helping us get any sleep.

He recently transitioned to 3 naps a day. Wake windows around 1.75/2/2/2.5 roughly depending on tired cues. He gets between 3-4 hrs of nap time over the 3 naps. Usually ends up being 3 hr 45 min. Prior when he was doing the 4 naps a day he was having a lot of issues napping during the day and fighting sleep, but the new nap schedule helped a lot to where he goes down easily for naps and 50% of the time makes it though a nap non contact once sat down.

Is he over tired ? Under tired ? Just a regression? Teething ? Is something wrong I’m missing ? Anyone have any advice or a similar issue ??

Hello everybody. Hope you don't mind me posting here but I'm fully at my wits end.

We have a soon to be ten month old girl and she's really dependent on us. Using AI I managed to break the midnight / 2 am wake ups by using the 3/3/4 method and this worked a dream for about a fortnight. But since then our little girl has decided to keep waking up at the end of her 45 minutes cycle, and this has been going on for just short of two weeks. She will scream and scream until we go in (I usually try and give her about 15 minutes to self soothe) and then when we go in she'll just scream until picked up. When we do this she will then lie awake on us for 2+ hours. It's as if she's fully dependent on us being there when she is breaking out of the first cycle. Since we've felt we have had no choice but to bring her down and calm her with lullabies I'm almost certain we have accidentally trained her that this is the normal thing and that's now why it's happening.

Our lad (now four and half) slept through from six weeks old so this is all completely new to us, and I'm starting to lose the will with her if I'm honest. Genuinely, I don't look forward to nighttime any more. If we could crack the code of getting her down at night I feel we could achieve so much more than sitting around watching the same lullabies over and over.

I apologise sincerely. I didn't mean to vent and create a text well. But what can I do?!

I’m really struggling to figure out my little guy’s sleep schedule right now and would love some advice from other parents who have been through this stage!
He is 20 weeks old (5 months on the 2nd) and his sleep is SO inconsistent, both during the day and at night. He hardly ever gives obvious sleepy cues, but he pretty much always looks tired, so I’m constantly second-guessing whether I’m putting him down too early or too late. 😩
We’re also dealing with reflux and laryngomalacia, which has made feeding and sleep a little more complicated. I often need to feed him to sleep or feed him while he’s sleeping because that’s sometimes the only way I can get enough milk into him. So I’m not really in a position to simply separate feeding and sleep right now.
The good news is that he does go down for naps in his crib with maybe 10 minutes of fussing, so I know he is capable of settling there. ❤️
He was previously sleeping through the night, and he will still occasionally do it, but more often than not he is now waking once or twice overnight. He also sometimes wakes as early as 5:00 a.m., although lately it’s more commonly around 6:00–6:30 a.m. Our ideal wake-up time would be around 6:30–7:00 a.m.
We aim for a 7:00 p.m. bedtime, but it seems like we’re having to move bedtime earlier to accommodate 3 naps a day.
Right now, we’re roughly following wake windows of:
1.75 / 2 / 2 / 2.5
But I’m honestly not sure if this is appropriate for his age, especially because his naps and nighttime sleep are so inconsistent.
For those with babies around 5 months, what did your schedules look like? Did you follow wake windows, sleepy cues, or a combination? How did you handle 3 naps while still aiming for a 6:30–7:00 a.m. wake-up and 7:00 p.m. bedtime?
And especially if you had a baby with reflux/laryngomalacia or feeding issues, I’d really love to hear what worked for you. ❤️
Any advice, sample schedules, or even just reassurance that this is a normal stage would be SO appreciated! 🥹

Do any other parents find tracking the wake windows and sleep to cause some anxiety?

Since starting to do this our baby’s sleep has drastically improved and she is so much happier and well rested. I find myself struggling with the tracking of it all though. I feel like I’m constantly tracking the time and it can take me out of the moment with her.

I guess I’m wondering does this all get more second nature the more you do it? Our baby is about 4 months old so each day is all over the place schedule wise and not consistent. I’m sure once she hits the two naps a day it will be a lot easier to plan around.

Our 5 month old (adjusted, was born at 33 weeks) baby can’t seem to sleep via sleep training. Mostly been doing modified Ferber / taking Cara babies. We have also tried a bit more of an extinction method a bit and pick up put down.

Following all wake window for his age. We cosleep so maybe that jump is too much? And he also sleeps on his side with me (because of previous reflux issues). I tried just putting him in the bassinet first but was too hard with me right there but crib not working either. He had reflux but is medicated. Was a super colicky baby but outgrew that.

He’s crying 2+ hours each night for a week now. Is that normal? Has maybe fallen asleep one time for 5-10 min but now I’m wondering if he was just being still for a bit.

Rarely he’ll go quiet for a bit but can’t seem to get to actual sleep.

He naps via carrier during the day and he’s never been the type to ever fall asleep without help including the car seat (scream cries the whole time) and has never been able to transfer.

Edited to add: using a sleep sack because he’s close to rolling but not quite there. I think if he could roll to his stomach that would definitely help.

TIA

Hi, recently my 13 week baby has been not taking her naps. I’ll nurse her to sleep and put her down and she’ll wake up 10 to 15 minutes later previously she was giving us 45 to 1 hour naps at a time. And I know she’s tired because she will have been up for two hours. She also used to give us a 5 to 8 hour stretch in the beginning of the night and then wake every 2 to 3 hours to feed. But now she is waking every 2 to 3 hours to feed. What should I do because I feel that she’s getting into an overtired state and I’m lost on how to help her sleep. I also EBF and she won’t take a paci. How can I sleep train her

My 3.5 month old won’t nap beyond 20 minutes. Every time. In my arms, the crib, the pram. She does sleep longer in the sling but she is so heavy now so only her dad can walk her around for an hour.
I wouldn’t mind if she woke up happy or somewhat refreshed. But she gets more miserable throughout the day and I know it is because she is tired.
I try blackout, white noise, same sleep environment at night.
At night she sleeps like a dream!! Only one wake up. So whyyyyy won’t she sleep during the day? One day she napped for 40 minutes then for 1h20. I was so happy! But she hasn’t done it since! I do t think I did anything different
Any advice welcome!!

I’m a SAHM with a 2 year old boy and an 18 week old boy. We are riding the struggle bus this last week. 18 week old refusing all naps after 2pm. We’ve tried the carrier, the stroller, the swing. I can’t sit in a dark room and rock him either otherwise our 2 year old will burn the house down!! I’ve tried putting him down in his crib for his 3rd nap and letting him cry but he will do this for like 20-30 minutes before I just abandon the nap. I have tried shortening wake windows, lengthening wake windows… I know this is a tough age but I am just at a loss here. Will someone tell me how they survived a similar situation or just commiserate with me? We are planning to sleep train at 5 months so I’m hoping his naps will improve after.

My 12 week old has stopped sleeping properly during the daytime for the last 2 weeks ish. He used to sleep 1/2 hours no problem but now if he does nap it’s 45 minutes on the button (assuming maturing sleep cycles). The problem is it’s a fight to get him to sleep every single time he fights and cries no matter what I do and the wake window. I am only able to get him to sleep around 2.5 hours a day maximum. Sometimes he will be that tired he will fall asleep eventually but keep going towards 3 hours but I then usually wake him so he doesn’t think that’s bedtime. I feel so stuck on what to do or how to manage it, I’ve tried dark room, white noise etc. he wakes to every single noise now (literally a finger clicking) and I can’t put him down anywhere for a nap it’ll only be contact. If it’s in the pram or car it’s 20 minutes and he is awake again. When does this get better?

For those of you who started sleep training at 14 weeks, did you go straight to a sleep sack? Or did you use something transitional like a Zipadee zip?

We did sleep training with my son at 14 weeks while working with a sleep consultant and used a Zipadee zip.

Planning to use the same method with baby girl but wondering if the Zipadee is necessary. Nervous that she will startle herself but also want her to have access to her hands.

Hi my baby is almost 9 months and I decided to start sleep training cio method I’m typing this as I’m sleep training in the middle of the night he’s been crying for almost an hour 😭 idk if I can take this anymore am I doing something wrong?? Will he go to sleep and when I don’t understand I thought the way it works is they cry their heart out initially and then get tired and sleep. This is how it went tonight. My intervention made it worse but I was just worried. He’s on 3 solid meals takes between 600-700 ml normally has a MOTN feed at 5am ish. He deosnt normally feed before then but because he wouldn’t has his before bedtime feed I thought he was hungry . I’m
Confused

8:19pm - put him down
8:20 - standing, sitting in cot
8:25 - fussing, wriggling, no cries yet
8:29 - started crying
8:31 - sleeping
10:40 - wake-up fussing and small cries (2-3 mins went back to sleep)
12:13- wake up and fussing and small cries
12.20 - went to check his neck if cold started screaming crying got worse
1220 - make feed milk ??
12:25am - offered milk he didn’t want it
1:09am - still hysterical crying since

Heres some background- LO is 5 months old as of a few days ago and has just mastered the art of rolling onto her tummy. She however, cannot roll yet from tummy to back. She has plenty of floor time during the day to try out her new skill and does it seemingly almost instinctively ALL day long. She will roll onto her tummy and get VERY angry, quite quickly. I help her practice rolling the other way but this rolling only-in-one-direction business leaves her very frustrated and upset. The entire day is spent fussing and whining and crying. She also is teething and already has tooth number one. I feel as though nothing I do makes her happy. Wake windows 2-2.5 hours throughout the day, sleeps 30-45 minutes per nap. Up for the day around 7:30-8am, down for the night between 7:30-8pm. Bedtime routine nurse, bath, song, jammies and lotion then rock to sleep.

ANYWAYS.. the night time is my worst enemy. I am up with her at least 6 times a night. After we put her down for bedtime is the most difficult. She sleeps for 40 minutes and wakes up, thinking it's a nap. She has done that for quite some time, I used to just nurse her back to sleep and she would go back down and stay down for at least 5 hours. Now it's up after 40 minutes, then 20, 15, 5, you name it. What used to be a seamless process now takes several hours. Then she's up every couple hours and to top it off she is up for about an hour between 4-5am. I am completely at the end of my rope and so sleep deprived that I am becoming depressed. This is in every way more difficult than having a newborn. It's only been 1 week of this and I can't handle it any longer.

We are ready to sleep train, HOWEVER.. she hasn't mastered rolling belly to back yet so is this even an option? Any tips to help me survive this? I feel like I'm losing my entire mind

Baby girl is going through the dreaded 4 month sleep regression. She turned 5 months on Aug 14. It started about 3 weeks ago. She wasn’t the best sleeper beforehand. We would maybe get a 3-4 hour stretch before if we were lucky. We are thinking of sleep training because we are exhausted from the lack of sleep. We follow wake windows for naps so as soon as she starts showing sleepy cues I contact nap her because her crib naps don’t last long and I want to protect her sleep. She naps about 2.5-3 hours a day. First nap is 30-40 minutes, second nap is 1.5-2 hours and last nap is 20-30 minutes. Her wake windows average around 2-3 hours. Focus right now is nighttime sleep first naps later. She sleeps in her crib beside our bed. Bedtime routine is change to pjs, moisturize, read 2-3 short books, bottle while twinkle twinkle plays on the hatch, switch to brown noise and burp and transfers to crib. We give her a bottle before bed and she usually falls asleep drinking it between 7:30-8. When we go to transfer she wakes and sometimes we can settle without picking her up but most times we have to pick her up and rock her back to sleep. Once she is finally asleep she wakes up every 1-2 hours. Each time we either have to give a pacifier or pick up and rock to sleep. She still feeds twice at night. First time between 11:30-12:30 and second time between 3:30-4:30. The second half of the night starting around 2am is the worst. She gets up almost every sleep cycle (45-50 minutes). Around the 5:30-6am mark she rarely settles back in the crib and I have to contact sleep her and she will sleep until 7-7:30. We were first thinking a gentle form of sleep training but if she sees us patting her and shushing she just cries more. So we are thinking Ferber at bedtime to teach her to fall asleep on her own and CIO for night wakings that are not during her usually feeding times. Looking for thoughts, opinions, advice, really anything at this point! How do you handle the crying. As much as it hurts we are so desperate for some sleep. Need to hear some success stories. Also first time parents! F(37) M(40).

Day time naps are not going well! Baby has serious fomo! Tips and tricks please!

Our baby has been sleep trained since 6 months. She is 18 months now. She has taken it to beautifully. She sleeps 11-12 hours a night. Here is her current schedule at two naps":

1. Awake between 6:30-7am.
2. Nap 3 hours after she wakes up, roughly around 10-10:30. She will sleep for about an hour.
3. Next nap is around 2:30, she would sleep until 3:30.
4. Bed between 7-7:30pm.

Since she hasn't napped for longer than 1:15 at a time (if we are lucky and she is really tired for some reason, she will sleep an 1:30, but that's very rare), we took it to mean she has not been ready to transition to 1 nap. We just started experimenting with one nap since we felt it was time given her age. We've attempted putting her down at 11, 11:30, 12, or 12:30. All of these naps resulted in a 50-minute nap. No more than one hour on our best days. Then she is just up for about 7 hours, which she's fine with. She's not cranky, doesn't freak out, and goes down just fine for bed. What are we doing wrong? This is miserable, because we cannot get this transition nailed, so the day time is just a mess.

My baby is 11 weeks old today. As of yesterday he will not sleep longer than 30 minutes during the day. And he does contact for all of his naps…. But it doesn’t matter. Now between the 20-30 minute mark his eyes pop open and it’s over. He was previously napping 2 hours or more if we let him.

Help! I have no idea what to do with this. When to put him to bed, etc. Isn’t he just going to be extremely overtired and be up all night? Is this his new norm??

I’d love advice and experiences. Thanks!

My 9-month-old used to sleep through the night until around 8 months old. Since then, he has completely stopped sleeping through the night. He co-sleeps with us, but now he wakes up almost every hour. I haven’t changed his bedtime routine, so I’m not sure what happened or why his sleep suddenly changed. I don’t understand how he went from sleeping through the night to now waking up constantly. I’m extremely sleep deprived and exhausted. I’m also pregnant again, which makes the lack of sleep even harder to manage. I’ve barely gotten any sleep over the past 2 months, maybe even 3 months, and I honestly don’t know what to do anymore. I just want to understand what could be causing this and how I can help him sleep through the night again.

Our boy is 15 weeks/almost 3.5 months old and started sleeping through the night around 10 weeks with anything between 8 and 10 hour stretches (sometimes even up to
11), no wakeups to BF. We started his bedtime routine around 7pm where he would get a bottle of pumped breast milk at bedtime before being transferred to his cot in his own room, usually asleep just after 8pm.
For naps he's never really liked being rocked to sleep and has fallen asleep relatively easily when we place him in his cot awake once he starts showing signs of being tired (all of a sudden becoming fussy/blank stare). We would stroke his forehead and place a hand on his chest to settle him and that used to work well - so I guess not self soothing, but falling asleep in his cot, assisted.
We also do eat -> play -> sleep to avoid the feeding to sleep association.

Now for the past week his naps are NEVER more than 45min (you can almost put a timer on them) and I only manage to get him to fall asleep again after waking up once in a blue moon.
He’s also been SCREAMING before his naps when I place him in his cot. Basically hysterical until he eventually gives up and falls asleep. He also becomes super cranky almost 20 minutes to half an hour before his nap and just feels like he’s miserable most of the time, and I miss my smiley boy. Wake windows are around 1hr30min, and I have tried putting him down for a nap earlier.
He’s also now started fighting bedtime and waking up once or twice shortly after we get him down in his cot (but at least settling quickly) and then waking up every night around 3am/4am. I try to settle him first but end up breastfeeding him eventually. He then takes very long to fall back asleep and wakes up again after an hour or two, then I put him in bed with us just as a last ditch attempt to get another hour of sleep.
I know he still gets a very good first stretch, which I’m very thankful. I’ve tried moving his bedtime an hour earlier because I think he gets overstimulated in the evening because his naps were so short during the day, but then he just ends up waking up an hour earlier.

I also feel like self soothing has gone out the window. Two weeks ago he often managed to self soothe after he wakes up by sucking his fist, but I feel like that hasn’t really been happening anymore.

But I want to know if things will ever go back to the way it was or is this the new normal? What can we do differently? Do I stick to the soothing techniques that used to work or change things up?
How long will this last?
The hysterical crying before every nap is making me lose my mind.

My baby girl is 13 wk this week and I will go back to work in a couple of months to a very intense job (say average 60hrs/week, sometimes 80hrs) so sleep is important to me.

I don’t know if I should sleep train my baby or not mostly because I am able to tolerate her waking for now (due to getting used to my demanding job lol). However, getting back to work with this - I am not sure. Her nights usually look like this:

- 6:45pm: start bedtime routine + bedtime feeding
- Around 7:30-8:00pm: going to bed. She usually falls asleep while feeding or when I am reading to her.
- Around 11:00-11:35pm: she may wake up for feeding (1 out of 5 nights) or we will dreamfeed her at 11:45pm
- 3:30pm-5pm: Most night she will wake up for a small feed (2oz vs full feed at 5oz)
- 7-7:30am: She will usually wake up on her own

What is your advice around sleep training? Will it help us a lot? When should I start?

Thank you!