u/MudOutside9945

So a bit of background, smoked 20+ years and was hopelessly addicted. I was at my wits end knowing I couldn’t afford to smoke anymore and homelessness beckoned, especially with my alcohol and weed habit.
I ended up deliberately getting myself addicted to quick mist for four years and things really started changing. I saved money, joined AA and moved out of dingy living conditions. I, for my life, couldn’t quit the mist, every time I did I would obsess over that strong minty hit and go nutters over it until I’d cave. The mist is expensive too so it was causing problems for me, I had to quit. So I started using 4mg, and made sure, like the mist, I got nicely addicted to them. They don’t give a strong hit like the mist and it took awhile to stay on them. I was using the gum about a month. I checked out the quit smoke app “smoke free” and signed up to premium. I thought well, hypnotists charge 2-$500, a quit smoking specialist quoted $5000. This offered 24 hour counselling and other perks do I tried it and boom! Spent the money , felt accountable, and haven’t chewed a gum in five days. I feel like I got through the hard bit, anxiety, craving , bad sleep , headache, in about 3days. Last night I slept like a log and woke up, all cleared up I feel fantastic. I know like any drug, if I so much as take one hit again I’ll be on the wagon. So gotta be vigilant

Nearly 5 weeks clean and my back and knee pain are almost non existent. I thought ppl smoked medicinal for chronic pain. I had chronic pain

I’m Christian right. It’s always a touchy subject, so I do what Jesus says and “keep it in the cupboard” so to speak 🧐. I am in early sobriety and managed to hit the nail on the head of my cross addiction. What I’m finding is that after a few sober days my mind clears and it’s like God invites me to be his friend. For instance I’ll repent hard after a bender and then be overwhelmed with remorse for days even weeks if I can’t get sober, so much so I can’t pray or make God a way. But now I’m clear I am filled with joy and I need to meditate and pray, read and create. It’s almost like I lose a part of me.
Anyway the spark I’ve been so desperately trying to find in relapse was given through work and stern warnings, cmon get to it. And that gave me faith that if I held on I could do it, I could get time up.
Faith to me is a guide and way to live, practice and I will train myself not to be selfish, acknowledge my faults and find peace.

My old supplier is finally gone, moving far away!!
Just over a month clean now and the temptation of them being down the street was too much. But now I’m free. I also have AA rooms (no MA here) to keep me happy. I just have an overwhelming sense of peace and freedom.

So yeah, have dealt with auditory hallucinations for over two decades, probably not a good idea to be smoking the entire time. My main supplier ended up in hospital a month ago and is now wheelchair bound and I can’t deal with them like that. She was batshit mental before that anyway. Anyway 1 month weed free and I can barely even force myself to hear anything that isn’t otherwise there. My minds clarity is just so much more peaceful than it has been for ages.
Oh yeah I started smoking in my teens, thus a mental breakdown at the age of seventeen and a living hell of a life to follow. I countered my “disability” by training as best I could an athlete and that’s got me ahead in life. I cannot vouch enough not to smoke weed in your younger years. I’m smart ok, but couple that with delusion, I never even knew my behaviour was off the whole time, it’s embarrassing to recall so many incidents I wish I’d never created. Stupid drug!