Guilt about making a big choice for myself.
Hi everyone, I’ve been wanting a cat for so long and I am seriously considering adopting one at some point this year. There is something I am ruminating about and I would love to hear any advice/thoughts. Thanks in advance…
I grew up in a Desi household with a father who is against pets. I am 28 now and live in an apartment w my partner pursuing doctorate studies. I’ve communicated with my family that I want a cat and they seem to be mostly onboard, but I know my dad isn’t enthusiastic about it. He says it’s fine if I take care of it and he doesn’t want more responsibilities in his life, which I totally understand and I would (of course) assume all responsibilities for my pet. But I can tell there might be some feelings there that he is not communicating. I’ve been living my life seeking approval from my dad for so long, and this is one thing I really want for myself. I usually go home for weekends with my partner to my family home about 30 miles away and I worry that my parents will think that I am selfish for not going home so often once I get my pet. I was planning visiting once a month and then them coming to visit me once a month too.
On top of everything, I know my dad hates change and this would definitely be a huge change for him.
I held a “family meeting” to discuss about all this, and he didn’t say much besides the responsibilities thing. He also said he wasn’t really interested in meeting the cat, but that he would do it since it is mine.
I feel guilty making a decision that I feel would benefit me and make my parents’ life harder in a way (because I wouldn’t go home as often, I guess).
Has anyone had similar feelings of guilt/experiences? If so, how did you overcome this or deal with this???