u/Nervous_Front_2109

Hey!
There’s something important I need to say before this story starts - I’ve had a boyfriend for almost three years now. And maybe that’s exactly why all of this makes me feel so guilty. But I needed to get it out somehow.
Back in seventh grade, there was this boy. And to me, he always felt different from everyone else. He was kind, intelligent, respectful - just genuinely good in a way that’s hard to explain. I liked him back then. We used to tease each other all the time, but honestly, I think what I felt was just some strange little seventh-grade crush that I never fully understood at the time.
The thing is… I’ve known him for as long as I can remember. We grew up in the same apartment building - we still live there, actually. We used to play together around the block, argue in the elevator over who pressed the button first and which floor we’d stop at before ours. Stupid little childhood moments that somehow stayed with me.
But I realized I liked him way too late. Right when our paths split. He went to a different school, I went mine, and life just moved on.
It’s been five years now since we’ve really had anything to do with each other. We grew into completely different people, living completely different lives. The only thing we still share is the same building and the occasional elevator ride. We say “hi,” maybe exchange a small smile, and that’s it.
And maybe that’s part of why this feels so strange to me now. Because I don’t even really know him anymore.
A few months ago, completely out of nowhere, I randomly thought about him again. I honestly don’t even remember what triggered it. But ever since then, he’s been quietly sitting somewhere in the back of my mind again.
He’s not very active on social media, so I don’t see him often. But whenever I do catch a glimpse of him from afar, I notice how much he’s changed. How much more mature he looks now. More masculine. Even his voice sounds different when I hear it. He grew into someone genuinely handsome. And sometimes that realization catches me off guard.
The weirdest part is that I have no idea who he really is anymore. I don’t know what his personality is like now, whether he’s still the same kind, gentle boy I used to know, or if he became someone completely different. Yet somehow, a part of me still feels connected to the memory of him.
I think he has a girlfriend too. And again - I have a boyfriend. A good one.
So why do I still think about him sometimes?
What makes it worse is that I’ve been dreaming about him lately. Three nights in a row now. And the dreams aren’t even dramatic - they just feel… safe. Familiar.
In one of them, I was really hurt by something, emotionally destroyed, and somehow I reached out to him. He came to me, hugged me, sat with me, calmed me down. We just stayed there talking, holding each other. It felt romantic, yes, but more than that, it felt comforting. Like home in some weird emotional way.
And ever since, I can’t stop asking myself “what if?”
What if things had happened differently? What if seventh grade wasn’t just one-sided? What if timing had been different?
And I hate that I even think like this, because it makes me feel disloyal. Guilty. Like I’m betraying something real for something that never even happened.
But at the same time, I think maybe these thoughts stayed somewhere deep inside me all these years. Maybe that’s why he suddenly appears in my dreams now. Because during the day, even if I don’t admit it often, I still remember him sometimes. Randomly. Quietly.
The strangest part is that I honestly don’t even think we could’ve ever truly been together. There’s another reason - something neither of us could change - that probably would’ve stopped us anyway, even if we had liked each other back then.
So now I’m just left with memories, dreams, and questions that don’t really have answers.
And maybe that’s the hardest part.
Because what am I even supposed to do with all of this now?

Hey!
There’s something important I need to say before this story starts - I’ve had a boyfriend for almost three years now. And maybe that’s exactly why all of this makes me feel so guilty. But I needed to get it out somehow.
Back in seventh grade, there was this boy. And to me, he always felt different from everyone else. He was kind, intelligent, respectful - just genuinely good in a way that’s hard to explain. I liked him back then. We used to tease each other all the time, but honestly, I think what I felt was just some strange little seventh-grade crush that I never fully understood at the time.
The thing is… I’ve known him for as long as I can remember. We grew up in the same apartment building - we still live there, actually. We used to play together around the block, argue in the elevator over who pressed the button first and which floor we’d stop at before ours. Stupid little childhood moments that somehow stayed with me.
But I realized I liked him way too late. Right when our paths split. He went to a different school, I went mine, and life just moved on.
It’s been five years now since we’ve really had anything to do with each other. We grew into completely different people, living completely different lives. The only thing we still share is the same building and the occasional elevator ride. We say “hi,” maybe exchange a small smile, and that’s it.
And maybe that’s part of why this feels so strange to me now. Because I don’t even really know him anymore.
He’s not very active on social media, so I don’t see him often. But whenever I do catch a glimpse of him from afar, I notice how much he’s changed. How much more mature he looks now. More masculine. Even his voice sounds different when I hear it. He grew into someone genuinely handsome. And sometimes that realization catches me off guard.
The weirdest part is that I have no idea who he really is anymore. I don’t know what his personality is like now, whether he’s still the same kind, gentle boy I used to know, or if he became someone completely different. Yet somehow, a part of me still feels connected to the memory of him.
I think he has a girlfriend too. And again - I have a boyfriend. A good one.
So why do I still think about him sometimes?
What makes it worse is that I’ve been dreaming about him lately. Three nights in a row now. And the dreams aren’t even dramatic - they just feel… safe. Familiar.
In one of them, I was really hurt by something, emotionally destroyed, and somehow I reached out to him. He came to me, hugged me, sat with me, calmed me down. We just stayed there talking, holding each other. It felt romantic, yes, but more than that, it felt comforting. Like home in some weird emotional way.
And ever since, I can’t stop asking myself “what if?”
What if things had happened differently? What if seventh grade wasn’t just one-sided? What if timing had been different?
And I hate that I even think like this, because it makes me feel disloyal. Guilty. Like I’m betraying something real for something that never even happened.
But at the same time, I think maybe these thoughts stayed somewhere deep inside me all these years. Maybe that’s why he suddenly appears in my dreams now. Because during the day, even if I don’t admit it often, I still remember him sometimes. Randomly. Quietly.
The strangest part is that I honestly don’t even think we could’ve ever truly been together. There’s another reason - something neither of us could change - that probably would’ve stopped us anyway, even if we had liked each other back then.
So now I’m just left with memories, dreams, and questions that don’t really have answers.
And maybe that’s the hardest part.
Because what am I even supposed to do with all of this now?

Hey!
There’s something important I need to say before this story starts - I’ve had a boyfriend for almost three years now. And maybe that’s exactly why all of this makes me feel so guilty. But I needed to get it out somehow.
Back in seventh grade, there was this boy. And to me, he always felt different from everyone else. He was kind, intelligent, respectful - just genuinely good in a way that’s hard to explain. I liked him back then. We used to tease each other all the time, but honestly, I think what I felt was just some strange little seventh-grade crush that I never fully understood at the time.
The thing is… I’ve known him for as long as I can remember. We grew up in the same apartment building - we still live there, actually. We used to play together around the block, argue in the elevator over who pressed the button first and which floor we’d stop at before ours. Stupid little childhood moments that somehow stayed with me.
But I realized I liked him way too late. Right when our paths split. He went to a different school, I went mine, and life just moved on.
It’s been five years now since we’ve really had anything to do with each other. We grew into completely different people, living completely different lives. The only thing we still share is the same building and the occasional elevator ride. We say “hi,” maybe exchange a small smile, and that’s it.
And maybe that’s part of why this feels so strange to me now. Because I don’t even really know him anymore.
He’s not very active on social media, so I don’t see him often. But whenever I do catch a glimpse of him from afar, I notice how much he’s changed. How much more mature he looks now. More masculine. Even his voice sounds different when I hear it. He grew into someone genuinely handsome. And sometimes that realization catches me off guard.
The weirdest part is that I have no idea who he really is anymore. I don’t know what his personality is like now, whether he’s still the same kind, gentle boy I used to know, or if he became someone completely different. Yet somehow, a part of me still feels connected to the memory of him.
I think he has a girlfriend too. And again - I have a boyfriend. A good one.
So why do I still think about him sometimes?
What makes it worse is that I’ve been dreaming about him lately. Three nights in a row now. And the dreams aren’t even dramatic - they just feel… safe. Familiar.
In one of them, I was really hurt by something, emotionally destroyed, and somehow I reached out to him. He came to me, hugged me, sat with me, calmed me down. We just stayed there talking, holding each other. It felt romantic, yes, but more than that, it felt comforting. Like home in some weird emotional way.
And ever since, I can’t stop asking myself “what if?”
What if things had happened differently? What if seventh grade wasn’t just one-sided? What if timing had been different?
And I hate that I even think like this, because it makes me feel disloyal. Guilty. Like I’m betraying something real for something that never even happened.
But at the same time, I think maybe these thoughts stayed somewhere deep inside me all these years. Maybe that’s why he suddenly appears in my dreams now. Because during the day, even if I don’t admit it often, I still remember him sometimes. Randomly. Quietly.
The strangest part is that I honestly don’t even think we could’ve ever truly been together. There’s another reason - something neither of us could change - that probably would’ve stopped us anyway, even if we had liked each other back then.
So now I’m just left with memories, dreams, and questions that don’t really have answers.
And maybe that’s the hardest part.
Because what am I even supposed to do with all of this now?

Hey!
There’s something important I need to say before this story starts - I’ve had a boyfriend for almost three years now. And maybe that’s exactly why all of this makes me feel so guilty. But I needed to get it out somehow.
Back in seventh grade, there was this boy. And to me, he always felt different from everyone else. He was kind, intelligent, respectful - just genuinely good in a way that’s hard to explain. I liked him back then. We used to tease each other all the time, but honestly, I think what I felt was just some strange little seventh-grade crush that I never fully understood at the time.
The thing is… I’ve known him for as long as I can remember. We grew up in the same apartment building - we still live there, actually. We used to play together around the block, argue in the elevator over who pressed the button first and which floor we’d stop at before ours. Stupid little childhood moments that somehow stayed with me.
But I realized I liked him way too late. Right when our paths split. He went to a different school, I went mine, and life just moved on.
It’s been five years now since we’ve really had anything to do with each other. We grew into completely different people, living completely different lives. The only thing we still share is the same building and the occasional elevator ride. We say “hi,” maybe exchange a small smile, and that’s it.
And maybe that’s part of why this feels so strange to me now. Because I don’t even really know him anymore.
He’s not very active on social media, so I don’t see him often. But whenever I do catch a glimpse of him from afar, I notice how much he’s changed. How much more mature he looks now. More masculine. Even his voice sounds different when I hear it. He grew into someone genuinely handsome. And sometimes that realization catches me off guard.
The weirdest part is that I have no idea who he really is anymore. I don’t know what his personality is like now, whether he’s still the same kind, gentle boy I used to know, or if he became someone completely different. Yet somehow, a part of me still feels connected to the memory of him.
I think he has a girlfriend too. And again - I have a boyfriend. A good one.
So why do I still think about him sometimes?
What makes it worse is that I’ve been dreaming about him lately. Three nights in a row now. And the dreams aren’t even dramatic - they just feel… safe. Familiar.
In one of them, I was really hurt by something, emotionally destroyed, and somehow I reached out to him. He came to me, hugged me, sat with me, calmed me down. We just stayed there talking, holding each other. It felt romantic, yes, but more than that, it felt comforting. Like home in some weird emotional way.
And ever since, I can’t stop asking myself “what if?”
What if things had happened differently? What if seventh grade wasn’t just one-sided? What if timing had been different?
And I hate that I even think like this, because it makes me feel disloyal. Guilty. Like I’m betraying something real for something that never even happened.
But at the same time, I think maybe these thoughts stayed somewhere deep inside me all these years. Maybe that’s why he suddenly appears in my dreams now. Because during the day, even if I don’t admit it often, I still remember him sometimes. Randomly. Quietly.
The strangest part is that I honestly don’t even think we could’ve ever truly been together. There’s another reason - something neither of us could change - that probably would’ve stopped us anyway, even if we had liked each other back then.
So now I’m just left with memories, dreams, and questions that don’t really have answers.
And maybe that’s the hardest part.
Because what am I even supposed to do with all of this now?