r/unrequited_love

I keep hearing that "everyone is human and people make mistakes," especially about parents, close friends, or partners who deeply hurt someone during the worst period of their life.

My question is: where do you draw the line between a genuine mistake and a conscious choice that someone is responsible for?

If the harm contributed to long-term mental health problems, and the people involved either abandoned you or said things that caused lasting damage, is forgiveness something you owe them? Or is it reasonable to decide not to forgive?

How do you distinguish compassion for someone's humanity from minimizing the consequences of what they chose to do?

I'm interested in psychological and philosophical perspectives, not just personal opinions.

Doesn’t make any sense, since there’s no way forward. I find myself saying things I think will make her happy, kind of pathetically, but what I really feel. Still desperate for any morsel. She’s got her path and I have mine.

So, this is the story it's a real one.I met him through Roblox, and before I knew it, he became one of the most important people in my life. Together with a girl best friend of ours , we became a trio. We laughed, played games for hours, and shared moments that made me feel like I had found people I truly belonged with.

As time went on, I realized I had a crush on him. And little did I know that's crush of mine turns into infatuation, actually I was planning on confessing on February 14 at that time but I got scared and coward so instead of telling him of I how I felt,I told him I no longer have a crush on a guy and then he remember the promise I made to him. He said "oh so you will finally tell me who? " and I was shock he remember, then I told him.A few months went by, we became super close.then later, when I started thinking he might have liked me too, I got scared. Instead of facing my feelings, I dated someone else. Looking back, I think I was a coward. I was afraid of ruining what we had, and ironically, my fear became one of the things that pushed us apart.

Life happened to both of us. He experienced heartbreak, and I went through my own changes. We drifted apart so slowly that I didn't even notice it at first. Every time I wanted to reach out, time is not aligning, I overthought it. I convinced myself he was avoiding me, so I gave him space, believing that was the right thing to do. In reality, we were both waiting for something neither of us said.

When we finally talked after so long, I was hoping we'd fix everything. Instead, we got closure. He explained his side, and I explained mine. We both admitted that we had grown apart. It hurt because I realized there wasn't a villain in our story. We just became different people living different lives.

Even after hearing his explanation, I still haven't fully moved on. I don't think I miss only the person he is now—I miss the version of us that stayed up playing games, the conversations we used to have, and the friendship that once felt effortless. Sometimes I wonder what would've happened if I had been braver. What if I had talked sooner? What if I hadn't run away from my feelings? Those "what ifs" still linger in my mind.

Now, I don't even know if we're still friends. Maybe we are, just not in the way we used to be. Maybe we're simply two people who once cared deeply about each other and are now walking different paths.

I'll always remember the time we said to each other the "maybe in another life"even if I wonder why not this life? Maybe because time doesn't want to.

Even so, I don't regret knowing him. He became an important chapter in my life, and because of him,I learned things about myself—about love, fear, regret, and the importance of communicating before it's too late.

I still hope that someday we'll find something we're both interested in and talk again. Not because I expect everything to go back to how it was, but because I'd like to believe that some connections don't completely disappear. Until then, I'll keep moving forward, carrying the memories with me, even if a part of my heart still hasn't learned how to let go.

I have had a crush on a girl for more than a one year . We used to work at the same company but in different processes, and we never spoke a single word to each other while we were there. Although we saw each other multiple times in the cafeteria and around the office, we never had any interaction.

After she left the company, I somehow found out her name by seeing it on her locker. One day, I waited near the locker area until she came after logging out, and I saw her opening her locker. That's how I got to know her name.

After she left the company, I sent her a follow request on Instagram, and she accepted it. I had been waiting for the right moment to talk to her because it felt weird to message someone I had never spoken to before, even though we used to see each other almost every day at work.

I decided to wait until her birthday. I wished her, and she replied with "Thank you 😊." Later, I realized she had replied to everyone who wished her on their stories, which made me feel a little sad because I had hoped she might respond differently to me. But that's okay. I still wasn't able to continue the conversation.

For the past few days, I've been thinking about telling her that I have a crush on her. I don't want to live with the regret of never expressing my feelings. I just want her to know that there was a guy who genuinely liked her. I don't expect anything in return I just want to be a part of her life in any form, even if it's only as someone who once cared about her.

At the same time, I feel like I haven't achieved anything in my life yet. I want to become a software engineer, and I feel like this is the most important stage of my career. It's not that I can't focus on both my career and my feelings at the same time, but it feels like a gamble during such a crucial phase of my life.

I'm also confused about her personality. She often likes reels that make her seem like a "man hater." She likes creators like Approva Rebel Kid, loves fictional male characters, likes reels about being quarrelsome, and watches shows like Splitsvilla and other reality shows. But at the same time, she also likes romantic reels about wanting a man who carries her photo in his wallet, tattoos her name on his neck, and treats her with love and care.

One more thing that makes this difficult is that I don't fall in love easily. I'm not someone who develops crushes on people all the time. When I do like someone, my feelings tend to last for a long time. In her case, I've had a crush on her for well over a year. That's one of the reasons I'm finding it so hard to just move on without at least letting her know how I feel.

Something else happened yesterday that made me think. I was talking to one of my female colleagues, and she told me, "Why are you rejecting yourself before she even has the chance to? You look good." Still, what she said made me question whether I'm being too harsh on myself and assuming rejection before I've even given this girl a chance to know how I feel.

What should I do?

Im 20F dating 20M we have been together for 3 months now and everything is good until now. I started a part time job for the duration of summer before i move states again and go back to uni and there where i met my coworker. It started with simple glances to simple touches to having full on conversation about whatever I don't know if this is mutual or is only in my head. He's just my type (everything that my bf isn't) but he's 27 years old and doesn't have a degree so i don't see any future in him. I won't ever cheat on my bf and i already feel bad cuz i feel like I'm emotionally cheating on him. I trying to stop whatever tf im feeling but i can't help it. Im torn apart between the both of them i don't know what to do

I'll start by saying technically I'm her boss... She doesn't work for me directly but technically everyone does with the way the business is structured. I'm recently single after my marriage broke up so I know I'm not in the right mindset to pursue anything. Gotta work on me first and get rid of my own baggage as well as I can. But I can't stop thinking of her. 40 yrs old and I feel like a kid again around her. I've been professional and I'll keep it that way. I haven't changed the way I act towards her but damn it's hard.

I really need some perspective because I feel like I’m draining myself and losing my mind.

I’ve been sleeping with this guy since September. He is incredibly hot and cold with me, carries a lot of baggage from his ex, and honestly treats me like an afterthought. He only wants me when it completely suits him, but despite how badly he treats me, I have developed real, deep feelings for him.

There is a massive layer to this that he doesn't know. Back in February, I found out I was pregnant with his baby. Without going into too much detail, I am no longer pregnant. I never told him about it, and I am starting to realize that carrying this secret entirely on my own is what is keeping me so deeply, painfully attached to him. My brain feels tied to him through this trauma. I don’t know if I feel safe to tell him, plus he has avoidant attachment so I don’t know how much he would support me.

He is all I think about. He rejects me over and over, but whenever I have a drink, my inhibitions drop and I text him. Every single time, the same loop happens: he’ll reply at first, give me a tiny bit of attention, and then just abruptly stop and leave me on read. Like last week he was flirty with me then this week he treats me like he doesn’t even know me.

I woke up today feeling so much shame. Why am I finding it so incredibly hard to let go? Why do I keep embarrassing myself by chasing someone who clearly doesn’t care about me the way I care about him? I want to break the loop.

Summary :

Need some honest advice

A few years ago, I met someone at work. From the very beginning, I knew I wanted to get to know her because I genuinely hoped that, if the time ever felt right, I'd ask whether I could pursue her.

Over the years, I never actually did because I kept convincing myself she was already seeing someone. A few assumptions, coincidences, and my own overthinking made me repeatedly step back instead of simply being honest. Looking back, I realise most of those barriers existed only in my own head.

Eventually, I decided that once a major project at work was over, I'd stop making assumptions and simply ask whether I could pursue her.

But life happened.

She lost a close family member, and it didn't feel right to bring this up while she was grieving.

Then, within the span of a month, my own life completely changed. My mother was diagnosed with cancer, my grandfather passed away, and I was denied a promotion at work that I genuinely believed I had earned. Even many of my teammates were surprised by the decision, and the situation at work has left me questioning my future there.

At the same time, she's now leaving the company for a well-deserved opportunity.

Here's where I'm conflicted.

Given everything happening in my life, I don't think this is the right time to ask whether I can pursue her. Even if the answer were yes, I don't think I'd be able to give it the attention and commitment it deserves while trying to navigate everything else.

At the same time, I don't want her to leave without ever knowing how I felt. I don't expect her to feel the same way. I'm not asking her to wait for me or change anything about her life. I simply don't want to spend years wondering what would have happened if I had just been honest.

So my question is:

**Would it be respectful to send her a message simply telling her how I've felt all these years, making it clear that I don't expect anything from her, and leave it at that? Or would it be kinder to say nothing at all and let her move on without ever knowing?**

I'd genuinely appreciate honest opinions, especially from people who have been on either side of a situation like this.

TL;DR: I had feelings for a colleague for years but never told her because I wrongly assumed she was seeing someone. She's now leaving the company, and my personal life has become extremely difficult. I don't want to ask her for anything—I just want to know if telling her the truth, with no expectations, is respectful or if it's better left unsaid.

Heyy!!! I wanna share something about someone who is really not in my life, but I want him to be in my life, and it's just that I feel really heavy and want to share. And please give me suggestions 🙏🏻

If you are interested in listening to my story then please dm me😭

Theres this girl named Amy she is absolutely gorgeous. In her mid to late 30s my best friends best friend. And idk what to do she is so independent and eveytime we talk she just makes me melt . Here comes the part where everyone hates me . I have a girlfriend and we have been together 4 years and she's amazing and I love her never cheated and she brought me to sobriety and is everything I've ever needed. But for the life of me I can't get amy out of my head to the point I wake up feeling like im in a fever dream off on to many Tylenols if you catch my drift. I would never do anything to jeopardize what I have going with my significant other but I don't know what to do. It seems I've fallen down a rabbit hole and idk how to get her out of my head. I find myself feening for the times I see her and the conversations we have and I don't know what to do.

My online friend (a 32-year-old man) rejected me and ignored my last message for a month because he had a new girlfriend the week I confessed my romantic feelings. Then he got back to me with a casual message. He said he had been depressed for a while and didn't want to disturb me with this mood. That's why I didn't asked him, "why did you ignore me?" I didn't say that way. Because he has the right to reject me, and he has the right to be lovers with someone else. When he returned to me, I supported him and acted politely. I acted as if nothing had happened. I don't know how he interpreted my behavior, but I think I acted warmly and friendly. He was constantly asking me what I was doing during our absence, and since he lived in another country, he indirectly asked to find out if I had plans to travel abroad during this summer vacation.I think he asked this question because of this: when I confessed my feelings to him, I told him that I was planning to go to the country where he lives this summer and that I dreamed of meeting him face to face. I think he's trying to say that when he broke up with the girl he was with (I'm not sure, I didn't ask any questions about it), if I went to his country, he might be available to meet and get acquainted with me right now. He's also having problems with his work life right now, and even if we had a romantic relationship, I know that the job search has affected his psychology quite badly. So actually, he might have done me a favor by rejecting me, because maybe neither of us were ready for this. I don't know if he still thinks I want him romantically. But I have no plans for a romantic relationship with him right now, and I'm not making any effort in that regard. But I'm not trying to get to know anyone else either. I'm just focusing on my career and my education. When he texts me, I respond to him with positive messages to make him feel confident. I'm doing this purely for our friendship with him. But for the last week, whenever I try to continue the conversation, he starts responding late and seems to get distracted at some point. When we are talking about academic subjects or something related to art, he suddenly interrupts the conversation and turns to me two days later and offers reasons such as "I was busy, I'm sorry, I slept a lot last night". He keeps the conversation going and are curious about what I'm doing and how my day is going. But he only shows interest in me when he sends the first message. When I text, I feel like I'm sending a message that will always be seen late. I feel like a slave. But if I were to tell him this way, he would politely tell me that he definitely wasn't aiming for anything like that, and I might come across as a sensitive girl who can't handle rejection. I want to keep my maturity and pride, but I can't understand some of his actions. What do you guys think? What should I do to avoid coming across as rude or insecure in a situation like this? How should my messages look?

Honestly I’m not normally the type to go to Reddit to ask for advice but I feel like I just need clarification as to my relationship with my guy best friend.

We’re both 21 years old. We’ve known each other since 7th grade. Met eachother through a mutual friend who we’re not friends with anymore.
We first didn’t like each other at first and were considered enemies but as we got older we realized we had a lot in common with each other. We eventually became officially friends around the age of 17? But as we continue to get older we got more closer. Mind you I’ve had a crush on him since the age of 17 once we got closer so I decided to confess to him. As I confessed to him I found out he was actually talking to one of my friends at the time(who is not my friend anymore). But when I confessed he had used the “maybe if we weren’t friends first and I met you now we could’ve dated”. Now we’re both 21 and i thought I moved on from my feelings but NO. recently I have noticed he’s gotten more touchy and affectionate with me when we hang out. Sometimes we’re not sober (I’m not going to lie) and he tends to do it a lot. Our other friends who are present have taken notice and have pointed it out to me too so I know I’m not going crazy.
So for example we were hanging out at my place not sober and just hanging on the couch and I have two couches. My friend was sitting on the smaller two seater meanwhile me and him were sitting on the four seater. Sat RIGHT next to me in one of the corner. With a whole lot of space next to him.
He’s also had given me compliments and has come with me to family events and slowly my feelings have gotten deeper.

Now, the issue is my “FRIENDS” told him how I’ve been feeling while I was unaware and out of town and when they told him he simply responded with “I’ll talk to her about it and no I don’t feel like that for her”
Mind you this was in APRIL he said that. No conversation has happened.
So my friends are saying he basically just like the attention and I need to stop feeding it to him but some of my other friends have said that maybe he does notice something and he needs time to think about it. While OTHERS have said to drop him.

So I’m just asking for advice on what I should do.
Im going on week long trip with him and I’m nervous in how to act on this.

Hi everyone.
Around a year ago, I confessed my feelings to a girl. She politely told me she wasn’t interested in a relationship. I respected her decision and never tried to pressure her or convince her otherwise.
Since then, we haven’t really talked. I tried to move on, focused on college, friends, games, and other things, but the truth is… I’m still not over her.
We haven’t talked for like 8 months despite both being in the same class. I don’t know ki whether she’s in a relationship rn or not
The strange part is that I don’t want to text her. I don’t want to confess again over text or send a long message. I just have this strong urge to talk to her once, in person. Not to force anything or expect her to change her mind, but because I feel like there’s so much left unsaid, and I wonder if one genuine conversation would finally give me closure..
At the same time, I don’t want to make her uncomfortable or disrespect the boundary she already set. That’s what stops me every time.
So I’m stuck between:
Talking to her once in person and risking making things awkward.
Staying silent and wondering “what if?” for who knows how long.
Has anyone been in a similar situation? If you were in her position, would you appreciate someone asking to talk once, or would you rather they leave things as they are?
I’m looking for honest opinions, even if they’re not what I want to hear. I feel very anxious about this…

The worse thing ever is finding the perfect girl who is already married. I am happy for her it’s just it’s been so long since I came across a girl as amazing as her. There are many fish in the sea but finding a good person is even harder.

Not sure how to cope. Some context, we slept together early last year, he told me he loved me then and some months later during a difficult conversation.

I didn't know how to deal with someone loving me so earnestly and took a ton of time to process my feelings. Figured out I'm in love with him at the end of last year, but every time I've gone to talk to him about it, I found out he was dating someone.

I don't want to be that person to bring up feeling when he's trying to build something. We are also pretty private regarding our dating life with each other, so its hard to know.

He hasn't made this girl public yet, but found out through some behavioral changes and observations.

We've been incredibly close the last 5 years. He's my best friend. Since we slept together it's been so hard wile I'm trying to figure out how I feel, trying to understand boundaries and expectations. We rarely ever talk about it directly, but indirectly all the time.

I've been okay since I figured out I love him, but haven't been able to tell him. Now I'm feeling like I will forever regret not diving right in when he told me last year.

Seems like he's also trying to put up some boundaries between us. It hurts. I don't know how or if I even have the right to talk to him about it. I'm the one who didn't respond. He put it all out there and I just went blank.

I'm so scared I'll never have a chance to say how I feel and I'm so sad seeing him everyday knowing this. I love my work. I helped build this. I also feel terrible being here everyday.

How do I cope?

So I (15f) was deeply if not utterly in love with this guy I'll call K, I begged my friends to get his number for me cuz I was stupid shy around him. He texted me and we chatted about games and mindlessly chattered about movies we both liked. My phone died a month ago and when I got it fixed I found out that he hasn't texted to be honest I felt sad, we never talked to each other in school to add I have no idea why . Anyway today we got back to texting and he apologised for basically ghosting me, He mentioned something I only told his friend I brought that up cuz I felt like they were talking about me behind my back his friend apologised but K told me "chill op I told you it's not like we were gossiping about you" he then called me sensitive and asked how old I was I told him that I was 15 and a half. He told me that he was 20(note I didn't know that he was 20) and I was like a 20 year old in the 10th grade. I told him that my sister was 20 he then said that I should set them up (note he knows I have a crush on him cuz I told him and he said he wasn't ready for a relationship but I thought he was like 16 back then) he asked for my pictures I told him not a chance cuz by then I had lost all trust in him. To be honest I still kinda like him after all that but not as much.

TL;DR: This story started when I started the hight school, it was my first year and it was a special school. We were supervised by the army, this is a school made for children who have parents in the army so almost everyone was in the same situation : two parents in the military, who move almost every time. So this was pretty difficult, cause I’m introvert and there was a lot of new face for me.
Few weeks before, I lost my mother, she was really sick and she passed her 3 last months at the hospital. And et the same time, my boyfriend left me because of his own problems. So I was totally alone, I lost my mother, my friends, and I was living the weekend with my father but I didn’t really know him that much and he didn’t really know me either.
And after few days, I started to talk with a guy. He was handsome, like probably the most handsome guy I’ve never seen. He was kind and intelligent. And when I was looking at him, it was for me pretty obvious that he wasn’t heterosexual, and I was absolutely right. For the firsts weeks, we were eating alone, just me and him. Every Wednesday we had 2 hours where we could left the school and wander through the city, and few time we went together, taking something to eat. And this was fantastic.
But I started to feel weird, not for me, but for him. Because I was clearly obsessed with him after few months. I was in love, and he was the only one to help me. I’ve got news friends, but I was always looking at him. And suddenly he stopped talking to me, for weeks and months we didn’t talk. It was probably hard for him, cause he assumed that he was bisexual or pansexual, and few guys were making fun about me and him always being together. And he probably wanted that to stop.
But even during these months without taking, we had some interaction. One night, after a bowling party with my class, we were the only two of the room who couldn’t sleep. So we talked, we talked for something like 4 hours and this was so sweet. And another day, we had another interaction. You need to know that in this school we had uniform, so everyone had the same dress. And one day, we were alone in the room and he come infront of me and he asked : "Don’t you think this pant make me a bad ass ?" I was really surprised, cause, why would you ask me this question after weeks without talking ?? And I said that his ass was looking good, but he didn’t seem convinced. So he went to his part of the room and he came back with another pant and he started to undress inform of me while saying : "I got this pant which is tighter so I should make me a better ass", and I couldn’t get my eyes of him, my heart has never beat like it beaten at this moment. It was excited and worried, what if he was just playing ? But I forgot this idea of him playing, and I just thought that he wanted a real opinion from me.
And after that, nothing until the few last weeks of school, I’ve got diagnosed with a depression and I went to hospital for a week. During these months I never felt so bad, I thought that I lost him. At the hospital they diagnosed me with a sentimental disorder, but I never got anything. The psychiatrist told me to get out of his office cause I didn’t have anything to pay, even thought I got a letter from a hight-ranking person of my city saying that my school will pay. And when I finally got medical treatment, my father trews it to the trash.

The last week, this guy came to me when I was in my bed and told me to follow him outside of the room. Once outside, he told me : "Never get your eyes on me again, I hate that, and it make me feel sick". At the moment I knew that I probably was the problem, I never wanted him to feel anything like that, but I still make him feel that. After that we never talked again. It was 3 years ago, and I always wondered what did he felt during these months ? Maybe some of the things that happened had finally never happened ? During my depression, I’ve got a lot of blackout, a lot of thing happened but I never remember. Maybe this had something to do with why does it turn so bad. And sometime I still dream of him, wondering why I had to be like this with him.

By the way, sorry for the mistake, I’m not English and I didn’t use anything to translate so I hope you’Il understand everything. And if you have any question, you can ask, or lf you had living something like this please try to answer to me about why

About a year and a half ago, I met a girl through work abroad. From the moment we got to know each other, I felt a connection that I honestly haven’t found with anyone else since. I’ve dated other girls since, but none of them have made me feel the way she did.

The complicated part is that she had (and still has) a boyfriend. What’s confusing is that she never really mentioned it around me because she knew I liked her and it bothered me. she always seemed to encourage the connection between us. We got very close. We’d hug all the time, hold hands in public, she’d act very affectionate and romantic, and many more. One night after going out together, we were even close to sleeping together, but we were both exhausted and nothing happened.

Because of all of that, I’ve never really felt “rejected” in the traditional sense. It always felt like there was something there that circumstances got in the way of.
Another thing that confused me was how jealous she seemed. I once went for coffee with another female colleague, and she apparently told that colleague she needed to distance herself from her afterward. That struck me as really odd.

Eventually she had to cut me off because she moved back to the city we both are now to her boyfriend, she told me something along the lines of, “Maybe we’ll be in contact again when the time is right, like 2 years maybe?". I have no idea if she meant it or if it was just something people say.

Since then, she’s viewed my LinkedIn profile multiple times, which seems random considering we don’t really talk anymore. On the anniversary of the day we first met, I also got two no-caller-ID phone calls. I have no proof they were from her, but the timing definitely made me wonder.

About a year ago, I texted her, and she never replied.
So now I’m stuck wondering: do I leave it alone and let her reach out if she ever wants to, or should I send one final message? Part of me thinks I’m reading too much into everything, but another part of me feels like there were too many mixed signals for there to have been nothing there.

Has anyone been in a situation like this? I’d appreciate some honest opinions.

P.S. This post is also a tiny bit of a karma bait, so if you enjoyed reading it or have any advice, I’d really appreciate an upvote. 😅

I dont even know how to start this properly. I just feel like I’m carrying too much inside me, and I have no one left to even say it to, I am gonna graduate soon, and I literally have no one in my life except him, and I don’t even understand how I ended up here. When I first met him, he was really tall,handsome, good looking. My kind of attractive looking guy and I didn’t notice him like that first, but it wasn’t like a crush anything, but later on he confessed, he liked me so i took my time and gave it a chance and also there were other things that made me see him as really talented and interesting.

He used to sketch very well, and in our course, sketching is an important part. I didn’t think about it too much. Then I just thought this would work out naturally, but slowly over time I feel like my life started shrinking without me, even realising it.

Looking back now, I think I was in love with the version of him I imagined in my head like when we started dating. I did notice he wasn’t the smartest person I’ve ever met. I don’t mean academically. I am not some Einstein myself. I don’t know how to put this, but I found him a bit dumb like the way he understood things.

It was very different for me, but it didn’t matter then, when I met him, he wasn’t the most ambitious guy he was just “I’m still figuring life”or “going with the flow” kind of a guy, but I am the kind of person who is really, really ambitious like I have goals. I want to live up to them, really bad, and then I think it got to him a little as well as it started with talking and I started to make him understand it, but it started to comeback against me like seriously? He slowly started picking up things started acting ambitious, but then he started making me feel little and used it as as excuses to not give time to the relationship or to do things for me, and he just started saying things like “I am doing this all for you “ “I wish you were more understanding” and it did hurt.

I mean, I was the most jolly, ambitious, full of life kind of a person, I remember, but this relationship stole so many things from me. It wasn’t just my happiness or emotional things. it stole away my college life too you know how people say and talk about how college was the best year of their lives. Mine just disappeared with him. I never got to enjoy the way everyone did and it’s not like I’m not up for spontaneous things. I always suggested trips/ outings late night drives, memories to build with friends. but every time I suggested something, he would always say “no, maybe later, not today, we’ll see” everything just became another excuse or another next time, and I just kept waiting for us to have those moments, and they never did and it kept getting worse.

The strange part is that he wasn’t like that with everyone. In fact, he made sure that he enjoyed his college life with his friends or anything else. He always found time. He always found energy. He always found excitement always found Money as well to the point where he was ready to even sell his iPad to go on a trip with them, but with me, it was always a big fat “No”. You know this isn’t the worst part.

The worst part is. I remember, I had to start begging him for the smallest things like spending a day with me or talking to me on a call or to get his car when we are going out or to watch movie together like seriously what kind of a boyfriend makes his girlfriend beg just to bring his car out for one day I literally had to beg him to get his car, not once not twice every time and he would still refuse. It wasn’t like it was some BMW or Mercedes. It was a bloody Ford Figo, some 10-20 years old. seriously, how low can a guy fall?

This was just the relationship, but then he started affecting my social life too. I was always a person without a social media presence, but I did have friends and a social life but being with him, it took away my friends too, not all at once, but slowly and painfully through situations that I never thought would lead to this like one of my closest friends trusted me with something very personal, and I told him because he was my boyfriend, and I was soo in love with him and trusted him, but this guy he goes directly to her and ask her about that same thing like it was just some casually information out there, and it destroyed everything between me and her and we ended up in a big fight, and I lost that friendship. and even after that things didn’t stop at a point in college, he spread a rumour that he did all my college work and suddenly people started looking me very differently and i didnt even understand how big it became until it had spread quite a lot, and I started dealing with the consequences internally. I could feel people judging me hard and also because I just lost someone, I was going through a tough time then but still he kept denying it and never taking responsibility or accountability for it.

Other times like he literally casually just because he was pissed at me one day so he dropped “this girl is so high to maintain. I have to spend like 10K on her every month, I do so much for her “ to his friend when i was just doing my work on the seat adjacent to them and that wasn’t true too.

Also, there was this college trip situation once when we were supposed to go to Manali or Delhi someplace, but in the start, we mutually decided that we wouldn’t go to that trip, but just before like the time was gonna be up, he went on the last day and he paid for the trip, and like obviously, it was 1-2 months before the trip, and he still didn’t ask me not even once if I wanted to come along. It was like he didn’t care at all. That really hurt bad and to top it off. I had to do a lot of his work which he lead in college some group thing when he and everyone else were enjoying on that trip.

There are many incidents like this, but somehow with me, it always was like I was asking for things that were too much like simple plans. Simple efforts, fun trips, like Goa or outing like I had to beg for normal things together he always choose anyone else over me, literally anyone, even if they weren’t such a close friend to him, he would still choose them over me, and I just kept forgiving it again, and again I kept thinking, maybe it will get better later etc slowly, this guy took away my friends, little literally all of them gone.

My college life gone my fun days gone and now I am here and I don’t know how to explain what I feel anymore because I don’t think I love him anymore. I think I stopped a long time ago, but I feel stuck because I don’t have anyone else in my life now. No friends no support system. Nothing it feels like if I leave. I’m just going to be completely alone and it’s embarrassing to admit, but that thought is a bit terrifying that if I leave him now, I literally have no one left and I hate admitting this, but I feel this relationship is taking everything from me, my college life, my friendship, my sense of freedom, my ability to just enjoy being young and everything just slowly disappeared.

I didn’t even realise it was happening until it was gone and right now I just feel exhausted, lonely, trapped,caged between knowing I need to leave and being scared of what my life will look like if I actually do. I don’t even recognise my own life anymore. I don’t know what to do next looking back. I don’t know how can someone make you feel that you are the most amazing person ever to making them feel like the most unwanted thing ever.