r/unrequited_love

So I was dating a girl when I was 14 and dated her 1 year. we we're very close tbh we used to go to school together by walking we had our own friend circle of 8 people and we used to go tution where only we both used to go no other boy or girl came to that place. Now the things happened after our exam i shifted to different city because of higher studies cuz that city wasn't that developed and then we got in long distance relationship and it was the time of winters 3rd of january the day just after she said my friends told me that she committed suicide and the reason was she was pregenent and it was all over the city news 16 year girl got pregnant and committed suicide and then I asked from whom she was pregent they told me my bestfriend after that I tried to contact him he also was shifted to another city for his studies so I thought noting would've gone wrong maybe his hostel doesn't allowed phone but when the sooner the holidays came and i was going to his house to ask how's he doing before reaching to his house I saw one of my friend I asked him do you need any help he asked where I was going i replied I'm going at my best friend's house he told me he committed suicide I asked when he told he didn't knew maybe 10 days after her.. suicide and I was like shattered at that point.

Now I'm 17 around 2 years have passed so far and I haven't dated after that. Now there's a girl I talk to we both wants to be in relationship but whenever she talks to another guy or anyone I feel very jealous and I'm not able to process that thing again I've developed very worse trust issues and insecurites I'm like isolating her completely like no male friends. I don't think I'll ever be able to date somebody.

What I’ve learned recently is that love is quiet and obscure. It rarely arrives looking like love—it isn’t loud, it isn’t familiar, and it’s almost never obvious. Sometimes, you’re already drowning in it before you even realize you’ve stepped into the water.

Love doesn’t obey rules. But then again, what are rules anyway? Love isn’t neat or typical. That’s what these past three years have taught me.

There’s this guy at work. Three years in the same office, three years of him. On my very first week, I looked at him, smirked, and joked, “Crush mo ’ko, ’no?” (You have a crush on me, don't you?) I’m a bit crazy, I know.

And just like that, we became a package deal.

Every break time, we were together. Wherever I went, he was right there behind me. Everyday, he’d wander over to my desk just to kill time—or maybe, just maybe, because he wanted to see me. Whenever one of us was spotted alone, people would tease, “Asan na asawa mo?” (Where's your spouse?) We were this unspoken, unofficial pair that everyone just accepted. Every time they teased us, we’d just look at each other and laugh it off.

But here’s the catch. He’s married, with a young kid.

So I kept my distance. I kept him strictly in the box of a close coworker, maybe a very close friend. Because I knew—I knew—that’s the only place we could ever safely exist. Maybe I’m a romantic deep down, but above all else, I am a realist.

Days bled into months, and months turned into years. Still just friends. He’d tag along every time I went down for a quick smoke break. We’d laugh at the stupidest things, whisper about office drama, and share whatever random snacks I brought from home. If I asked him for a favor, he’d do it without a second thought—loyal, gentle, and eager, like a golden retriever I somehow managed to tame.

Then, the cracks in his life started to show. Things with his wife grew shaky, until they eventually separated. But legally? They’re still bound.

He never directly told me at first, but the subtle hints were there, heavy in the air. Being as intuitive as I am, I caught every single one. Yet, even as his world was falling apart, my mind stayed resolute: Even if they aren’t together anymore, there is no “us.” There never will be.

So I played it cool. I acted normal. No pushing, no reaching, no asking for more. Just ordinary days passing by.

Until the day we finally broke. We had a fight—an ugly one. He said things that hurt, and I made sure to throw my own sharp words right back.

Silence followed for days.

When we’d cross paths in the hallway, one of us would take a sudden detour or stare intently at the floor, pretending the other didn’t exist. People started asking why the inseparable pair was suddenly walking alone. We ate lunch at different tables, with different crowds. I’ll admit it—I can be cold. I held onto my pride. But mutual friends told me he was taking it hard. He was skipping meals. He stopped smiling when people greeted him. He buried himself in his work, using deadlines as a shield. And whenever my name came up? He’d just shrug and stare into space, as if he hadn't heard a word.

On a random, quiet night, my pride finally cracked. I let go of my ego, picked up my phone, and typed two simple words:

“Sorry na.” (I'm sorry)

The next morning, his reply came:

“I miss you.”

And slowly, painfully, the world tilted back on its axis. Things went back to the way they were.

...But what he doesn't know is that I’m resigning this month.

I’m packing up my life and moving to a different city.

So, to my... whatever you were. My favorite complication. My nameless totga in another universe.

Thank you for the three years.

Ingat ka palagi, bro
(Take care always, bro)

I had a crush on someone almost a year ago. We were in the same office for only about two months and mostly just exchanged glances, we hardly spoke.
I’ve never really experienced feelings like this before, and somehow I still can’t seem to like anyone else. I’m wondering if I should just tell him that I liked him, not expecting anything in return, just to get it off my chest.
Would you do it, or just leave it and move on? I really need advice since this is my first time🥲

i am having the hardest time in my dating life nowadays. i just have a hard time grasping the concept of loving someone completely new (or to some degree) and having to start over.

i yearn for the times i had w my first boyfriend, even if i was the one who carried the majority of the relationship on my back. i just miss him. or the idea of him. i miss knowing that there was a person who listened to me and i can have at any moment. he didnt really answer my phone calls, so i heard from him only on his terms. it was an addiction. i admired the beauty of him. i miss listening to him share his latest nerdy muse. i miss soaking in his presence. His aroma. i felt like i gave him my all. so much time and energy went into that relationship. most likely because i couldnt bare being alone, physically or mentally. i felt like his life and what he had going on was far more interesting than what i had in front of me. i gave him so many gifts as well, probably the best gifts he could've ever had, and they were expensive too. he didnt get me many, or any but that was fine at the time because i just loved being in his presence.

but mother was right, beauty doesnt last forever. and he had nothing really going on his life. he wasnt interesting. i downplayed a lot of what i had going on but not to make him feel better but because i tricked myself.

he didnt give me much of his attention or time but when he did, oh man that was a ride that i clung onto. he didnt show me off or showed me how or why he loved me. very minimal effort so of course the spark started to fade away, hence why i ended things. but man i gave him my all.

and i am afraid no one will experience that type of love from me again.

the thought of beginning a new chapter with someone else leaves me feeling jaded. Its exhausting to think about how much effort i would have to put into someone new.

anyways i dont need advice really just sharing this to leave my chest because i feel so alone with moving on. we broke up 6 years ago and i am grieving. I am grieving how i poured so much into him when he wasnt even my person. the person id spent forever with, but at the time i thought i wouldve. im aggravated because i wish i could take back my love and have the energy to give it to someone different. someone more deserving. someone who could pour back into me through ways that would leave me feeling refreshed.

just one day. lets see. wish me luck and ty for reading this far. LOL