u/Ocean-of-Mirrors

When I first started making any art, it was written prose or like poetry. Some drawing/sketching too. And the only reason I did any of that is because I was experiencing so much emotion that I “had to get it out”. Although I wasn’t great, those little pieces of work were pretty vivid and I liked that mode of operating. It was good to have an outlet for my emotions that resulted in something tangible.

I’m a composer now, though. And it’s probably my best skill. But I noticed that my reason for writing music is never because I’m feeling intense emotion. And when I’m actively composing, my analytical mind takes over completely. I’m in the zone. I’m thinking about technical stuff, so the only emotions I’m feeling are usually boredom or frustration or intense glee (when it’s going well) or just nothing at all.

I guess when writing words on a page or doodling those things can happen in the span of a few minutes, but when writing music, I mean, it takes me hours, days. And I often go back to pieces from last year that I never finished and continue working on them. My emotional state is never consistent. And my self awareness totally dissolves when composing anyways.

I think the “meaning” of a piece almost only becomes clear once it is done and I snap out of it and look at what I’ve created. And I see aspects of myself within it but it’s usually not what I expect. Subconscious stuff.

I guess I’m just wondering how everybody else operates? And thoughts on this in general? Do you guys ever get thrown into a fit of rage and decide to write music from that? I don’t know how I could possibly do that!

Edit: dissolve -> dissolves

I found that huge document from explorers of sky which shows the expected stats for each pokemon based on their level and also how much they gain each level. But my pokemon don’t match it at all.

For example I caught a wurmple in joyous tower and even after evolving to beautifly and leveling it a bunch, it still had wurmple stats. So it seems like every species of pokemon has the same stat gains within their evolution line, but the stats they START WITH depend on which stage they were when first encountered? IE. I should catch a silicon rather than a wurmple because the “wild” silicon have higher stats than “wild” wurmple? And it doesn’t matter what level I evolve them at?