u/Ok-Reward-770

Greetings everyone!

Some time ago I made this post https://www.reddit.com/r/romani/s/dy10fGawHD
which was in response to a conversation in the comments on another post (https://www.reddit.com/r/romani/s/fC4KUOSc0m).

Maybe I’m writing this for myself and people like me (mixed Roma and Gadje) or maybe for anyone who found out they have Roma ancestry after a DNA test. After all, many Roma children were placed into orphanages (an exceptionally high number in Romania), and some lucky ones were adopted and live now better than if they were raised as wards of the state. Still, many are seeking answers to the depths of who they are.

In certain aspects, some members of this group aren’t too different from some of my Roma relatives when it comes to defining who is Roma and who is gadje.

My venting comes about because of a comment saying “you can’t be Roma alone,” followed by a one-sided perception of Roma identity. I bet this isn't something that irks me alone.

The reality is that the Roma identity doesn’t end with the beliefs and choices of a couple of Romano patriarchs and the members of that tight-knit group(s).

Sure, sure, based on those beliefs, any Roma married to a gadje and subsequently their children “stop being Roma” because [insert whatever Roma cultural belief and tradition that defines it]. These arguments also apply to all Roma adoptees raised by Gadje families and completely separate from the Rom culture.

The reality, and thus the truth, is that we may have left or been born outside the culture, but the blood and anything tied to it don’t change. That’s the other half of our identity’s story.

The blood, the cells, the genes —they hold history; they tell a story, and that same story is kept alive by any gadje aware of our origins.

- Do you think my gadje parent and their gadje family ever cared what the Roma people think of my Roma parent who married outside of the community? NOPE

- Do you think that a mixed gadje and Roma child born outside of the Roma community and its culture, stops being one, and thus stops being treated like one because deep in your heart you truly believe what your Romano elders taught you about who is and who isn’t Roma? NIET

As long as they existed, my Roma parent was reminded every single day who they were and what people assumed and expected from them. My Roma parent was very proud of their Roma culture. Loving and marrying a gadje was more of a happenstance than wanting to stop being Roma.

On the other hand, while growing up, there was no day in my life when everyone in the gadje “village” that raised me did not treat me like gadjes treat Roma people, or expect me to behave a certain way based on my Roma side.

Even to this day, as “gadje” as I am in the eyes of some, I have to worry or be mindful of whom I disclose my Roma identity to. Because that’s the thing: no wishful thinking of a staunch Romano culture purity defender can erase that identity from the minds of anyone who would choose to define me solely by one side of my family.

I'm so Roma that my Roma family name is still an Indian surname. I can't even pass as mixed Romanian only, because of that surname. But alright, to the purists I raise a glass of Prosecco and toast to their magic thinking, and to the people who are grounded in the year of our Lord 2026, I raise the entire bottle.

Salut!

P.S.: No Roma is ever alone. The gadje policing is so hard and heavy that all of us have a version of it in our own minds. For Liberation!

The Netflix fumble must have been so great after they got rights over ATLA’s IP that when Michael Dante DiMartino and Bryan Konietzko left due to the creative differences, “alleged” broken promises and toxic environment they took Korra with them.

I wanted to rewatch TLoK after watching AATLA movie and womp, womp! I’ll have to either get the DVD collection or subscribe to Paramount. Yikes!

I thought, I should let some of you know.

A short list of Roma human rights activists so anyone can study their work and understand why the g-word and any of its translations are perpetuating the language of bondage and violence against ourselves.

—To be helpful to your/our community isn't limited to feeding them/us or donating money here and there. It is a very important and commendable work AND/BOTH; ending systemic oppression requires a blueprint for systemic change and a new system to replace the former. Thus, learning, learning, and learning is key.

—IGNORANCE is what makes many of us fight tooth and nail for a word, or to reclaim it as a source of pride in ethnic identity. But ignorance can be eliminated through learning; to learn, people must be curious, engaged, and proactive. Traditional school systems won't save us. It never did!

• “Dr. Margareta Matache spoke about the importance of International Roma Day as a time not only to remember the suffering of Roma in slavery, in the Holocaust, and in modern-day society, but also to lift the cultural contribution and resistance of Roma. Rather than hearkening back to a distant culturally or historically significant date, April 8 commemorates the first international Roma Congress in London in 1971, which agreed to embrace the name “Roma” and repudiate the denigrating term “g-word.” […]”

—Dr. Margareta Matache is a Romanian Romani activist and scholar with over 18 years of experience in human rights. Margareta was the first child in her family and community to attend high school. She has a B.A. in Social Work, an M.A. in European Social Policies, and a PhD, magna cum laude, from the University of Bucharest. She joined the Harvard FXB Center for Health and Human Rights team in 2012, where she currently works as an instructor and director of the Roma Program. Before this position, Dr. Matache served for seven years as the executive director of Romani CRISS, a leading Romani non-profit in Romania.
Margareta grew up under the first wave of Romani activism in post-communist Romania. Her father, a construction worker of Romani descent, was a community activist, which helped foster her interest in human rights.

—Dr Nicoleta Bitu is president of the Democratic Federation of Roma in Romania (the most active Romani organization in Romania) and a member of the board of the European Roma Institute for Arts and Culture (ERIAC). For over 25 years, she has been an activist for Romani Human and Women’s Rights and Advocacy. She is a recognized and published expert and has worked for Romani CRISS, the Open Society Foundations, the Council of Europe, the European Commission, and Romano ButiQ.

Anita Awosusi, German Sinti human rights activist and board member of the Documentation and Cultural Center of German Sinti and Romani in Heidelberg.

Katarina Taikon-Langhammer, Swedish Kalderash activist and leader in the civil rights movement. With her sister Rosa, she helped found the Zigenarsamfundet(Roma Society).

Nicolae Gheorghe, Romanian Roma human rights activist and founder of CRISS, a Romani non-governmental organization dedicated to promoting the human and civil rights of Roma and combating discrimination against us. He started during the Ceaușescu regime and continued it until his passing in 1993.

This is not a complete list, nor are these the only figures worth learning about.

If you would like to add to the list, please leave a comment.

Edit to add: I'm Romanian Romani, raised internationally —not in the USA.

I've been watching Marvel Studios'
What If…? and Rick and Morty The Anime. Later, right after watching Avatar Aang: The Last Airbender, I started wondering if, instead of Netflix turning the original animated series into live action, it would have been better to do it in an alternate universe. 🤔

Netflix's live-action cast is hilarious in their interviews, rather than trying to fit them into the wardrobe and style of the animated world. Having an adaptation that reflects the actors' era and dynamics could have been a better use of the IP and their ensemble cohesion.

What are your takes?

View Poll

If you haven’t watched it: DO IT!

It’s everything the fandom would’ve wished and wanted.

The animation: great.

The story: awesome.

The characters: better than ever.

To me it was like watching ATLA Book 4 - Air (it never existed). Worth the wait.

The story happens 13 years after the end of the Fire Nation war.

Aang is 25 (hot than ever, hahaha), Toph is 25 (still the best earth bender in the world), Katara is 27 (a more mature version of herself), Sokka is 28 (he will be Sokka forever), and Zuku is 29 (also a more mature version of himself). I’m sharing this because I know it will be helpful. I spent a lot of the movie trying to place them in a timeline.

The new characters are breathtaking. Seriously!

I wish the creators NEVER license their IP for live action, like they did for the original ATLA.

For the folks who made the few movie theater tickets vanish in a few hours or less, you lucky bastards, good for you! I watched and I’ll be watching it on Paramount until my free trial ends.

Flameo, hotfandom, flameo!