u/Ok_Duck_8484

I'm posting here because I need to type it out and I'm wondering if anybody else had similar experiences. I have very severe self harm scars (6 very thick and long ones layered on thinner, smaller raised ones and everything's very purple) and I had to get wisdom tooth surgery today. they're only on my right arm, so at first I only gave them the left one but they couldn't find my vein. I had an old nurse who seemed quite experienced so I thought that she had seen it all, but as she put the needle (into my hand, there's like no skin left on my arm lol), every time the blanket lifted, I heard a gasp or an "oh my goodness". i could tell that it was unintentional, but I felt so, so bad.

also i'm 15 and live in australia. do you guys think she told my parents?? and would she have put it on my medical record? one of them was still scabbing over a LITTLE bit (otherwise healed) but everything else was fully healed.

Hi all. Just want to preface by saying that I'm in HS and hence <18. I've never struggled with an eating disorder/body dysmorphia/the such, but I've noticed patterns in my closest friend recently. She keeps looking at her body in mirrors, asking me "Do my legs really look that fat?", refusing food, asking me to not get her legs in photos, always covering her face, not eating when we go out, only having a small amount of chips during lunch, and always looks really tired with a shaky voice. She also would sometimes tell me "Omg, I just realised that I forgot to have breakfast and lunch!" and I would just stare her in the eyes until she looked away, which I now realise was a bit shitty, but I really didn't know what to do. It's been going on for a whole year, and at first I thought she would just recover or smthing over time, but she really hasn't. She looks borderline underweight, but her physical body isn't boney-no-fat-left concerning.

I looked at some forums online to see how I could help but I didn't get many good responses. One comment I received told me to 'not get too involved because it because it can affect you', which I didn't think was that true, but after half a year or so of trying to coax her out of this disorder (not commenting on her weight but instead her mood, inviting her out a lot, modelling healthy eating behaviours) and failing, I really have started to notice some changes in my behaviours. This includes starting to track my calories, purposefully eating less, and noticing weird "inconsistencies" in myself. I've never been "fat", actually >!mildly underweight!< my whole life, but anyways, my most important issue is that I really like to do exercise - speed walking, dancing, tennis, and swimming, and I also take pride in my studies. I've felt a change in my ability to move/think because I've been changing the way that I eat, and I feel a little resentment (a lot, actually) towards her for bringing this onto me. I've also started something called binge/restrict, although not too severely. I would hold off on my eating for a couple days, but then I would fail and eat a lot for one day, and it always makes me feel so sickening and bad. I want to be able to go back to how I was before but she keeps acting this way around me and I don't know how to un-awkwardly tell her to stop without ruining the friendship.

My question is: Is it alright to send her a text somewhere along the lines of: Hi I've noticed [her behaviours] which is really similar to anorexia. At first I tried to ignore it, but it's really started to affect me and I don't feel good being around you anymore because [reasons]. It's making me feel really bad about myself, so please don't talk to me until you've recovered yeah? Then we can be good friends again!

HOWEVER this is why I feel so conflicted that I need to take this to Reddit: I have a large, strong group of friends that I can easily rely on more for social connection, but she only has me plus like 3-4 others, with only one of them being close. Not because she's a bad person, but because she's an introvert. I would feel bad ditching her, and I don't know if this would make it better or worse because she'll have no company and support. We also see each other EVERY DAY and sit next to each other in class because of assigned seatings.

All opinions appreciated!

Hi everyone,

I'm very conflicted about dropping maths - half of my friends support the decision and half of them are very against it. My parents are very against it as well. I'm taking this to reddit for some more opinions because I feel like having different perspectives will help inform me more.

Reasons why I want to drop:

1. The school tests are genuinely impossible to predict. They are marked extremely strictly in the "easy" sections, especially the graphing qs yet you are never prepared for the marking schemes, and the harder questions are just... indescribable. I remember in year 9, on the last question, we literally had a warning that said "If you know calculus, do not use it".
2. The teachers cannot assign appropriate homework for the life of them. Despite our insane tests, we get assigned normal Cambrdige and ICE-EM textbook exercises. They take around 30 minutes to finish + 20 minutes to mark, fix and compile + 10 minutes for challenge questions every day HOWEVER that is not the issue. I would be fine studying this much IF the work was useful. The reason why I hate the homework so much is that it's so menial. It's like if you had to do 1 hour of single digit addition everyday. I would hate it even more if I had to do that in the senior years. We have 5-10 challenge questions in the textbooks per topic only and they're definitely not difficult enough for our tests
3. The internal scaling is... questionable. The range is maths marks is always insane. Last test, the standard deviation was SIX. That means if you're below average in marks, then you're probably ranked >80/150 (personal estimation only as we aren't given ranks yet), killing off any chances of reasonable scaling. And strangely, the average HSC Maths Advanced mark is only 87 and there are only 37 band 6s?
4. It's the only subject that isn't a humanity so it won't be "boosted". I'm taking English Advanced, Italian Beginners, Geography, Biology and Modern History, potentially adding Ancient if I decide to drop maths. They're all very word-dense subjects and help each other because of that.
5. This is a half-reason concerning scores: For the last two tests I've been ~1 mark off the average. Also, my scores in year 9 were: 59, 64, 90 and 91 for yearlies. Some of my friends who are fully set on 4u tell me that they've never even been in the 90s before. However, those last tests literally killed me and every last bit of passion I had for maths. For the yearlies, I'm not even kidding, I studied 16 hours a day of maths for 2 weeks and around 18 hours a day during the weekends (lots of energy drinks, that's how). I wouldn't pay attention in any subject because I would just be doing maths. If that's the extent I need to go to in order to get reasonable marks, I feel like it's sort of not worth the effort?

Reasons why I'm questioning my decision:

1. Getting sick of writing essays all the time. Although I would much rather write essays for 1 hours than solve equations, if I burn out from writing essays 70 hours a week, I wouldn't know what I would do. Not like I can just pick up maths in the middle of the year. I feel like I enjoy writing essays right now mostly because I still have space to be inquisitive. As in, my marks are alright enough to give me some space to personally enjoy the subject. One bad mark and I'll probably come crashing down.
2. If I ever want to transfer to a maths course later on in university, it'll be either impossible or extremely expensive. Although I'm 99% sure that I would never want to TOUCH a number later on, there is still that 1% chance that I should consider.
3. I won't be able to calculate a couple things in the future like mortgages without expensive help. This one is kinda self explanatory, but I've been told by some friends that not learning this level of maths will actually affect my future. Is this true?

Quite a big imbalance between reasons for and against, I know. I would love it if people could give me their perspectives. It would also really make me more confident in my decision. Thank you!