u/Oploplou

Hangover meal is carnitas with a healthy amount of guac.

This is going to be a hard one for me to write, especially as this is very fresh. So please bear with me a bit if it seems a bit rambling, I’m going to do my best, but my head is a mess right now.

Last night was homecoming for the college my wife (31F) and I (28M) went to. We were both Greek, and haven’t had much time to get away and have a good night since she got pregnant more than two years ago ago now. So we took this opportunity to do so.

Everything had been going great all day, we both got to introduce our toddler to all the people we haven’t seen in a long time, we got to go to the restaurant in town that was the scene of our first dates, it was a really good time.

Fast forward to around 11pm. Everyone is some level of drunk and or high, my wife and a couple of our friends are sitting on the bar talking, when a very obviously too drunk young lady tapped me on the shoulder, and asked if she could show me pictures of her dog. I kind of was a little caught of guard, especially because as I said my wife was right next to me. She tells me it’s fine, so I start looking at the pictures.

The poor girl was very drunk, and was not being subtle about flirting with me. When I noticed she wasn’t going to stop I said “you know I could show you some pictures of my wife and kid if you’d like”, she didn’t really process this, and put her hand on my thigh as she was scrolling through more pictures. I said “please don’t touch me”, and then she immediately turned to face straight towards me, and straddled my leg, sort of grinding herself on my thigh, and grabbed my crotch.

I wasn’t exactly sure what to do, again my wife is sitting right next to me, so out of pure reaction, I said (not quite yelling but definitely more than normal conversation, it was loud with music playing and 150 people talking) “get the fuck off of me”. In hindsight I wish that hadn’t happened, but it did.

Well so she got off of me, and I said “you literally just assaulted me, in front of my wife. Please walk away.”

Well she did walk away, and right to the president of the chapter. He pulls me aside, and the story he tell me is NOT what happened. She told him that I pulled her into my leg, and put her hand on my crotch. She also completely skipped the part where she was flirting with me for minutes before hand. He told me something to the effect of “well you’re gonna have to leave because she’s saying you did all that.” Despite the fact that my wife, and two other women are standing there telling him that she is lying, and backing me up.

So I leave, and we went to her societies house for the rest of the night, hoping that this would more or less blow over, as I genuinely did not do anything to this woman.

I woke up to a call from the president this morning, and he had the entire executive board on the phone with him. They told me that until further notice, I am completely banned from the property, and that if I try to come before I’m allowed back, that I would be stripped of my letters, and permanently blackballed.

So here’s the thing, I’m 28, I don’t need a frat house to go and party at, I’m not concerned about the fact that I can’t go there, I barely have since I graduated anyway. My issue is two fold. 1. There were multiple witnesses to the incident, and none of them corroborate her story, everyone who spoke up said that I was being very respectful, and that it kind of happened out of nowhere. 2. I now have this attached to my name/reputation. I’ve already gotten three texts from other people, that are asking me why I did what I did, and I have no way to be able to defend myself, because everyone who saw what happened, is graduated.

I just don’t know how to feel, or handle this. I keep coming back to the same thought of, if I’d done what she did, the entire fucking basement full of people would’ve been on me, but she does it to me and I get banned? This is doubly hard for me, because I’m a CSA survivor, so a lot of very hard and depressing memories from that time are also filling my head right now.

My wife knows I did no wrong, and that’s what truly matter, but I can’t shake this feeling. I feel dirty, and I hate it because I was the victim.

ETA: clearing up a couple common things that keep coming up. 1. I don’t live at the frat house, as I said in the post, I haven’t even been there in more than two years. 2. This took place at the frat house, not a bar, and there are no cameras.

Well it’s like the title says. I’ve been a Stay-at-Home-Dad/Husband since mid May, and almost immediately I noticed things were different. Not better or worse at that point, just different. Over the last couple months though, things have been so much better.

My wife and I never had a bad sex life by any means, but I had been quite some time since I would have described it as great. We’d do it maybe once or twice a month for most of our 10 year relationship, and it was normally the same dance, or close to, every time. My wife doesn’t have very high libido, so we have just always done what works right for her, and skipped the fluff.

But over these last couple months, she’s opened up an incredible amount. I don’t want to get too graphic about things, but just generally I’ll say we’ve both been able to explore some things we’ve wanted to, but never felt comfortable to. She’s also been able to go for longer, (I unfortunately suffer from delayed ejaculation) which has led to us being able to finish together, and that is just AMAZING!

But to tie this all together, last night after our fun, we were laid up talking, and I asked her if there was a reason she’s been feeling more in the mood lately, her response was “honestly, I think you being home with the baby is really hot. You do such a great job taking care of both of us, and that really does it for me I guess.”

So I guess that quells my feelings of having been failing my wife and child as I was talking about in this post: https://www.reddit.com/r/BoyDinnerDiaries/s/wCWnYfZcnZ

No big story here, just over the moon with my corn bread. I’ve been playing around with the recipe for a few months now, and I think I finally got it as close to perfect as I can.

My secret? Bacon. Cook frozen bacon in your cast iron right before you do the batter, pour the batter into the still hot pan and grease, then straight into the oven. The cast iron gives a nice crust, a good Smokey flavor from the bacon in the batter, and the grease in the pan. It’s just perfect.

Today I’d like to not regurgitate the same old talking points you’ve likely heard for years at this point, but tell you a short story of my week, to hopefully illustrate my point.

For a small amount of context, when asked in my SOPHOMORE YEAR OF COLLEGE, what my dream job was, I said being a stay at home parent. This has always been something I wanted, and I’m eternally grateful that I am fortunate enough to have a wife who not only makes enough money to make it possible; but was enthusiastic and supportive of the idea. Alright now that that’s out of the way, my story.

Monday morning the baby woke up about two hours earlier than normal. No big deal honestly, we just got up and played, we took an early and long nap, and everything seemed okay. Maybe a little off, but nothing compared to when we woke up. For the next seven hours straight, I frantically tried everything in my power, to get them to stop crying for brief moments. My wife eventually got home, and I was completely fried. Thankfully she was able to get them to calm down for long enough to eat for the first time since the morning snack right before the nap, but then it was back on.

Tuesday the fever started. Nothing insane at first 99 when we woke up, so I gave some Tylenol, and we had a semi normal morning. It was at this point I realized they were teething, and I was going to be in for it. By 5pm we were up to 100 degrees, so we packed up and went to urgent care. They basically told me to give them cold water, Tylenol, and plenty of rest. (I’m not complaining now, because I understand it’s all you really can do at this age, but it feels so disempowering in the moment.) I thanked them and we went home.

Wednesday and Thursday were much the same. Fighting a fever, constant fits, and very hard time getting them to eat.

Finally this morning the fever broke, and the teeth cut through, (all four canines at once!!!) and I have at least somewhat of my bumbly little baby back! It’s so good to see the smile on their face again.

But now that the situation has calmed down, I’ve been able to reflect on my own behavior for the last few days, and I’m nothing short of ashamed.

On Wednesday, there was a point that I was so overwhelmed, that I had to put them in their high chair, while crying, so that I could walk away and cry and let out a truly awful scream. It’s so difficult to know that there is just simply nothing that you can do to help the thing that means the most to you in this world. I do my best to keep it together in front of them, but I’m not always successful. I raised my voice at least twice, and I know that does nothing, and it’s not their fault, but you just feel so trapped.

Thankfully we’re still best friends, and the sun seems to be setting on this hard phase we’ve been in.

Lunch was a big bowl of rice, because that and peas is all I was able to get them to eat.

Alright, so on the surface this seems incredibly easy to figure out. It’s a Monte Carlo SS, BUT if you know much about this generation of these cars, there will be some immediate questions (there are for me at least)

1. Why does it have the surfboard? As far as I know, and can find on the internet, this spoiler did not come on this version of this generation.
2. What’s up with the wheels? This are LS wheels as far as I can tell.

The description says everything is original, and provides several other photos, but nothing definitive. It does have the 7 gauge instrument cluster, so that’s a point in the right direction. There are no pictures of the engine either.

My fear is that this is an LS, that had the interior options chosen, and has been stylized to look like an SS. I know that after 2000, they gave LS buyers the option to put either spoiler on the back, and you could fully option the interior, but it would still have the 3600, but as far as I know, 2000 was the only year you could get the surfboard on an SS, and this is claiming to be a 2003.

Edit: just typing “Chevy Monte Carlo (SS)” doesn’t actually help. I’m trying to understand why this car is the way it is. If it’s an SS, why does it have all the LS things. If it’s an LE, that’s obvious that it’s just been dressed up.

Garlic bread pasta, with lemon pepper chicken.

It’s easy for us to feel like we’re falling behind in life. Social media has created a world, where you can see more “successful” people in a day, than our parents would have ever seen in their life up until this point. For me, this manifests in constantly feeling like I am behind the 8 ball.

My parents are also very well off, and they want us to make our own way, and thus we get minimal help. I appreciate it in some ways, I resent them for it in others. On one hand, I appreciate that I have genuinely learned the value of a dollar at a young age. However it becomes a hard pill to swallow, when they regularly take vacations that cost more than 3x the amount of debt that I have, that’s currently holding me back in several ways.

I’m going back to school to finish my degree, and I’m fortunate enough to be in a position that my wife is able to take care of all of our bills, and all I have to do is take care of going to school, and the baby. I’m hopeful that with my degree, I will be able to get into a “big boy job” and I’ll make headway.

But look at all the details of this story. I’m young, married, have a child, have a plan and a way to achieve that plan. I’m doing a lot better than the pessimistic outlook would have you believe, and I hope to make an even better life for my family.

Smaller than normal for me, because the wrap had some tears at the front and back. Had to trim it up, and this is what I came up with. I love woods of all shapes and sizes.

It’s on here pretty well. I don’t want to just scrape them because I’m worried I’ll scratch the metal. Soap and water hasn’t been working. I don’t use chemicals to clean typically, but if it’s required here I will.

Tuna Noodle Casserole, made with Asiago cheese and white sauce.

My wife (30 f) and I (27 m) have been married for going on two years in June, and we have a one year old. On paper, I’m winning at life. Beautiful family, almost no debt, decent jobs for both of us, going back to school in the fall to finish my degree, everything sounds great.

But behind closed doors, I’m miserable. My wife goes a step past being messy. She actively does not care about the house being cleaned, and thus it all falls to me.

I do all of the cooking, and that’s not just for us, I also have to cook a bi-weekly meal for her family that she MUST have over, even though she will contribute nothing to the gathering. I also help take care of my sick Nana (which I absolutely love to do I’m just illustrating how much cooking I have to do regularly) so I make her freezer dinners weekly.

Our sex life has fallen to shambles since the baby was born, it wasn’t necessarily constant before, but now it’s so seldom, I can count on my fingers how many times it’s happened since we found out she was pregnant, two months after the wedding.

Most nights end in us arguing over how I said something, or the fact that I’m upset about her having to be explicitly asked to do the single chore she has agreed to take care of, the babies dishes. This is a huge problem, because she also does not rinse the bottles out, and will allow the milk to just sit in them. So then we have ROTTING dairy just sitting on the counter, and are supposed to feed my infant out of that?!

I’m also majorly depressed, like diagnosed bipolar 2, and have currently been depressive for going on 6 months, and it feels like I’m just expected to continue doing everything, with absolutely no consideration for my health.

She’s also told me that she thinks I’m a better parent than her, I can’t help but agree. She’s always on her phone, and very loose with allowing our baby to watch TV. It’s very rare to see her get down and play either him on his level.

All of this really came to a head when I heard the song Labour earlier today. Ive come to understand that typically, it’s a generally considered a feminist anthem, but feminism is about equity right?

Thanks for coming to my rant. Idk what I’m even looking for here. To get things off my chest? Advice? Idk.