u/Ordinary_Bridge9703

I just remembered what I commented - it was this copypasta, which honestly makes this even funnier considering I've commented this before.

The tornado touched down in Los Angeles California and began to slab everything in its path with around 100 mph winds. However it rapidly intensified to 250mph winds as it left the city, leaving the citizens thinking that the Day After Tomorrow came to life, which it kinda did.

The tornado maintained its 250mph winds while travelling through the deserts of California and Arizona, slabbing Phoenix along the way. At this point the tornado was 3.5 miles wide and damaging basically nothing as it moved into New Mexico because who lives out here anyway. It was at this point that streamers such as Ryan Hall and Maximum Velocity got word of the giant tornado traveling through the southwest, and booted up their livestreams.

Quote from Ryan Hall when he started the stream: "Alright everybody, we're gonna jump right in here, because this here tornado is nothing short of plum wild y'all! Look at that thang!"

As the tornado travelled through New Mexico it was starting to gradually weaken until it hit the Texas border, where there was about 23000 j/kg of CAPE in the atmosphere, the tornado grew to 10 miles wide and strengthened to 550mph winds. As it traveled SE through Texas many PDS tornado warnings were issued but no tornado emergencies. Then everyone realized it was heading straight for a familiar place, Jarrell. At 600mph winds and 20 miles wide, the NWS still only had a radar indicated tornado warning because "it could have just been a giant downburst."

Max and Ryan were watching the tornado happen on their livestreams and were so shocked as they were never trained to deal with something so insane. The tornado moved out of Jarrell and eventually out of Texas and into Louisiana maintaining its strength. The tornado traveled through Arkansas in honor of the Vilonia tornado of 2014 and then starting heading west into Oklahoma.

Max reportedly said "now THIS is a drunknado if I've ever seen one, I mean look at it!" Since it was heading Oklahoma it went to slab Norman, Moore, OKC, and El Reno in one fell swoop. 17 tornado emergencies were issued as this happened and before anyone knew it, the tornado moved out of Oklahoma, north into Kansas where it slabbed the city of Greensburg just like 2007. Then it crossed into Nebraska where it did a bunch of weird ahh loops in memory of the 1980 Grand Island tornadoes. It continued north into South Dakota, then into North Dakota, where the tornado rapidly turned east, then in honor of the Enderlin EF5, did a loop back north and to the west. Afterwards it went on to slab Fargo in honor of the 1957 F5 tornado, then cut south once it traveled into Minnesota.

Nothing much happened in Minnesota but then the tornado moved into Iowa, and degreed meteorologists around the country were noticing, it was heading for Greenfield! Reilly issued a MaxAlert for Greenfield when the tornado was around 200 miles away from the town still, because they knew this tornado's shenanigans in advance. Then lo and behold Greenfield got slabbed, and MaxAlert saved the day.

Then the tornado headed into Missouri and headed southeast towards Poplar Bluff! Then it turned back west and slabbed Joplin! Everyone was dumbfounded at this point, but this was just the beginning. The tornado turned down into Tennessee, then Mississippi, when it would begin re-slabbing areas from the 2011 super outbreak. Starting with Smithville, it traveled south then west to Philadelphia where it caused 40 foot deep ground scouring. Then the tornado suddenly started going west to Georgia, then down into the Florida panhandle, just so all the states in the lower 48 could be slabbed. Afterwards it went back to Mississippi to slab Natchez in honor of the 1840 tornado, then Rolling Fork in honor of the 2023 tornado, then Yazoo City in honor of the 2010 tornado.

Meanwhile on Max's stream:

"We have an urgent update from Reilly, go ahead Reilly."

"Hey Max, there's too much happening! I can't fucking keep up, it's insanity! All I can say is that this tornado seems to be slabbing areas impacted by previous outbreaks. If your town is known for being hit by a tornado, you best be on high alert."

"...okie dokie Reilly thank you for the update."

And correct Reilly was, as the tornado traveled into Alabama slabbing Tuscaloosa, Birmingham, then turning north to slab Tanner, Hackleburg, and Phil Campbell. The tornado headed east to Rainsville for the final slab before heading out of the Dixie Alley.

Meanwhile on Ryan's stream...

"Alright y'all it's time for your Clarksville Check-in! Let's see... oh, shit. WOW. Um, if you're in Clarksville, that tornado is coming. Take shelter, bring me with you if you want."

Clarksville was inevitably slabbed, and the tornado started heading east through Tennessee, slabbing north of Cookeville in memory of the 2020 tornado, slabbing Pigeon Forge, and heading into the Carolinas just to do a loop back west.

As Ryan was busy on his stream tracking the tornado and flirting with Y'allBot, an alert started blaring from all his devices. TORNADO EMERGENCY for Pikeville it said. "Oh shit, it's coming for me next y'all! This is plum wild! Uh okay, I'm gonna leave you with Y'allBot, and I'm gonna go take cover."

After the slabbing of Pikeville, the tornado headed for a place it had heard about, but never seen before for itself - Illinois. The tornado crossed the Ohio River into those borders and pure chaos began. It was a scramble as the tornado began bouncing off the borders on Illinois like the DVD screensaver logo. This went on for hours, and eventually the NWS just gave up and issued a tornado emergency for the entire state. About 10 hours later the tornado finally left the state and traveled through Indiana and Ohio. It traveled across the rugged Appalachians of West Virginia to honor the 1944 Shinnston tornado, then went into Maryland and crossed the Chesapeake Bay in honor of the 2002 La Plata tornado.

The tornado traveled up the coast and Max Velocity was still livestreaming after all this time, staying awake off of energy drinks. Quote from Max as the tornado hit New York City:

"I can't even say I'm surprised anymore, cause I mean, what is even that bro? A tornado hits New York City, you don't see that everyday, but this tornado already hit like 30 other cities so it's just not surprising at this point. Reilly fell asleep hours ago anyhow so, yeah."

The tornado traveled up Long Island then through Massachusetts, Maine, New Hampshire, Vermont, Rhode Island, and Connecticut before going back into New York then crossing Pennsylvania into Ohio in memory of the 1985 tornado outbreak. It turned north to Canada to see the sights of Ontario and slab Detroit along the way. For one of the tornado's last slabs it went into Gary Indiana and hovered over the "city" for roughly an hour, before continuing northwest.

All the tornado had left to do was travel through all the states it hadn't seen yet. Montana, Idaho, Washington, Oregon, Nevada, Colorado, Wyoming, then Utah, where the tornado had its last slabbing in Salt Lake City, in memory of the 1999 tornado. Then it dissipated in the mountains of Idaho.

Standard damage surveys were not possible for this tornado because it literally traveled across the country. The estimated path was 24,000 miles long, and the max width was roughly 31 miles. The final rating was set at a low end EF3 with winds of 140 mph, but the NWS said "there was probably EF5 winds..."

this took over an hour to write.

idk what I even commented son

Just curious about this sub's opinions on him, since he is largely overshadowed by Ryan and Vax Melocity and isn't talked about much.

Yes it's here.

OH WOW

If you wanna suggest a certain tornado, just post in the comments. The suggestion that gets the most upvotes will be the next tornado I have Max livestream for.

these are quite fun to make.