u/Pass_the_xanax123

Well, the day has come. My flexible remote-working job is slowly turning into a hybrid job and I am losing my mind slightly.

I’ve worked remotely for nearly two years and it has worked really well for me. We now have a new manager who is keen to bring everyone together for regular “team bonding” days. I have absolutely no issue seeing my colleagues, but it’s now become a set 9–5 coworking office day every fortnight (yes it could be worse but that’s not the point here).

With my endometriosis, I know there are certain points in my cycle where my energy and symptoms are significantly worse. I can’t predict exactly how I’ll feel on a particular day, but I know that my periods are very heavy, can last up to 10 days, I have to change period pants every few hours, feel disgusting and on top of that need a TENS device to counteract the pain when it peaks (that part usually only lasts 2 days). I also have to take antidepressants for PMDD as I used to spiral into depression and suicidal thoughts before every period so it really is a battle.

I’ve provided a GP note saying I need flexibility around these periods and suggested monthly office attendance as a baseline, with additional days for things that genuinely benefit from being in person - workshops, brainstorming, external speakers etc. Instead, I’ve been told that if I’m not well enough to come into the office, I should take a sick day. I would of course take a sick day if it was a very bad day and have done before multiple times.

The thing is I am usually well enough to work. I can work perfectly effectively from home. I’m just not necessarily well enough to add 2–3 hours of commuting and a full office day on top of it.

I’ve now had repeated messages asking whether I’m coming in despite having already said I’m working from home, and I feel like I’m being made to feel difficult for asking for flexibility.

After posting about this on a legal/work advice subreddit, I got absolutely destroyed in the comments 😂 Clearly a lot of people have no understanding of endometriosis or chronic conditions with monthly flare-ups.

So, fellow endo sufferers - am I actually being unreasonable here, or does this sound like a reasonable request for flexibility that is being ignored?

Last night, as I was drifting off to sleep, I had the strongest feeling that my nan was with me, gently tucking me into bed. She passed away in December, seven months ago, at the age of 71 after a battle with cancer.

It wasn’t a visual experience at all (I wear an eye mask to sleep), but the feeling that she was there was so strong and so peaceful that I instinctively reached my arm out onto the duvet as if to touch her and say thank you.

This morning, my uncle (her son, who’s only a couple of years younger than me, so we grew up more like brother and sister and are very close) messaged me saying he’d had the most vivid dream of her on the exact same night. He said they were dancing together, and it felt completely real and woke himself up crying as she hugged him and had to leave him. He hardly ever remembers his dreams.

He’s been struggling with memories of her during her final months when things got really bad, and I can’t help but feel she wanted to remind him of happier times. I’ve been battling some health issues myself, and it felt like I just needed the comfort from my nan that I’ve been missing so much.

It felt incredibly special that we both had such comforting experiences with her on the same night. Has anyone else experienced something similar with a loved one?

I honestly can’t believe I’m writing this but my period started today… and for the first time in years, I didn’t realise it was coming because I didn’t have the usual PMDD spiral beforehand.

No crying every day. No feeling like everyone hates me. No thinking I’m a terrible person. No thoughts about driving off a bridge or not wanting to be here. No overwhelming sense that life wasn’t worth living. I just… got my period.

I’m only about a week and a half into taking escitalopram (10mg daily), and still feel extremely fatigued, so I’m obviously not claiming this is a miracle cure or that one cycle means it’s “fixed.” But I’m genuinely shocked.

What’s even crazier is that life hasn’t exactly been calm. Over the past several months I’ve:
-watched my nan go through cancer and lose her seven months ago, and I’m still in grief counselling
-had my endometriosis surgery cancelled after waiting years because my thyroid worsened out of range
-been trying to increase thyroid medication slowly after previously reacting really badly to it
-rushed my dog to the emergency vet
-dealt with a bed bug infestation (ughhhh)
-been working in a stressful, understaffed job with uncertainty about my role
-lost a couple of close friendships during my grief, leaving me with a much smaller support system with the majority now either pregnant or with babies so I rarely see them

For years I put off taking an SSRI because I only felt awful for part of the month. I worried it would change my personality or numb me when I actually felt okay. Instead, I just feel… like myself. Just more balanced.

If you’ve ever gone from “I don’t want to be here anymore” to “what the hell was that?” the moment your period arrives, you’ll understand why I’m so emotional (in a good way) writing this. I really hope this is the start of something better.

I know this is only my first cycle, so I’m keeping realistic expectations. But if this resonates with anyone who’s been sitting on the fence about trying medication because you’re worried it’s admitting defeat, or that it’ll change who you are, I hope this gives you another perspective.

PMDD is a real condition. It’s not a lack of willpower, and needing treatment isn’t a failure.

I’m actually quite overwhelmed by the fact that I don’t feel overwhelmingly low. I didn’t realise how much I was surviving each month until this month felt… normal. I know the pain is coming soon due to endometriosis but to not have that emotional turmoil on top is such a relief.

If this helps even one person feel less scared about asking for help, it’ll be worth sharing 🩷

Hi all, I am having a right nightmare currently as I keep getting bitten not every night but over the last few months one bite here and there but suddenly 6 bites on my hand overnight!!!
I’m a ground floor flat barely open the windows in the day to prevent anything from coming in right now, have used all the devices to try to lure it out and repel/kill.
I’ve got a insecticide repellent plug-in device. I have the jungle formula deep spray insect killer spray. I’ve used bug repellent essential oils which have things like lavender Citronella etc very strong scents. I have got a night lamp with zapper that can kill the mosquitoes and flying insects, tea tree oil balm and just basically everything to kill the bastards.

I have I’ve checked the bed because it’s happening overnight so of course you think initially oh no is it bed bugs but it’s only everyone exposed skin like my arms or my hands nowhere else so that gives me a little bit of a reassurance. I do have a dog so I’ve checked for fleas and everything, but again it’s just on exposed skin when I go to sleep and I’m pretty sure I felt it land on me the other night and hit it away and then felt it come straight back onto the other hand so there is some sneaky little mofo here. I need help to try and get rid of it as I’ve currently got six bites on one hand and they are so itchy. I react quite badly to them. I’m using a device from Germany like a heat spot device which seems to be the only thing that helps as antihistamines I take daily for hayfever they don’t seem to do much and creams etc don’t really do much but anyone else in the same situation or similar that have got rid of this because it’s getting really annoying!!?

Hi all, I’m in the UK and was due to have my surgery next week however I’ve just been told it’s got to be postponed with no further information on timeframes.

I also have a thyroid condition with Hashimoto hypothyroidism and unfortunately my thyroid levels are showing worse than they were when we initially tested them last year which is the reason. I’ve been on medication but I reacted really badly to a high dose so I’ve had to lower the dose and build up my tolerance to the medication but that means my thyroid showed like it was improving but now it looks worse again so the anaesthetics team have decided they would like to postpone my surgery.

It’s incredibly frustrating as I’ve been on the waitlist since the beginning of last year and I’ve got everything in place ahead of the surgery next week what time booked off of work due to doing my handover tomorrow and I’ve even got my Hospital bag ready and now I just feel deflated. I’ve also just had such a bad period and it’s just I was just hoping that this would be the last one before potentially some kind of relief but yes that’s where we are.

Has anyone else had similar experiences? I’m going to push back on the cancellation because it’s just my TSH that’s out of range. Everything else is still in range other than my TPO antibodies for Hashimoto, but they didn’t really look at them anyway which is good news for this but it’s just solely down to the TSH and from what I see online that’s not really that problematic of course anything out of range can potentially cause complications but yeah, just I suppose a little frustrated and wanted to rant.