u/Phi-the-creature

I've only talked about this with one of my irl friends, and I guess I just want some thoughts on the matter. So I've known for years that I'm asexual, even thought I didn't have a label for it for a while, but now I'm wondering if I'm maybe also aromantic? I've had a lot of thoughts about being in a relationship sometime in the future, but recently I've been wondering a lot if I even want that or not.

I've done some thinking, and I don't know if I actually want a relationship, or just like to entertain the idea of one. The thought of being bound to someone for the rest of my life is kind of daunting. Another thing that has impacted these thougsht was my family's reaction to me telling them I was asexual. My mother straight up said that she thought something would be wrong with a marriage that didn't involve sex, so now I'm sitting here wondering if I want to even gamble being with someone who might say they don't want it, but then not take seriously the fact that I don't want it ever.

I don't know, maybe I'm just paranoid, but any helpful thoughts would be appreciated

I just wanted to get some things off my chest, honestly, so that's what this post is about. So I'm agender(hence why I'm posting this here) and I've told several of my friends, but I haven't told my family, and honestly, I don't ever plan to. I've already recieved judgement and criticism for being asexual(except from my brother), and I don't want more stuff on top of that.

I don't think they would understand at all what I'm really like, and it scares me to even think about telling them. I wouldn't know how to even start going about that conversation, let alone dealing with the possible and probable backlash it would cause.

They don't really care how I dress/act, so I can mostly be myself around them(I've worn dresses and suits to school dances, they don't care about that part), but I can never tell them why it is that I like to dress feminine, masculine, and neutral. I wish I could tell them so that I don't have to hide this part of myself from them, but at the end of the day I know that it would be a really bad idea.

I share a room with my sister, let's call her Chloe, and for the most part it's fine. I'm not in there much, mostly spend my time in the basement. Obviously we're going to have disagreements, it's siblings sharing a room, after all. But there's one that continues to come up: her perfume.

She uses more sprays than is recommended(she's used five at once before) and the smell really spreads throughout the room. I have a very sensitive nose, and her perfume causes me to get headaches if I'm around it for too long. During the school year we're both in our room in the morning getting ready, and I've asked her before if she can use her perfume in the bathroom instead, since there's a fan in there specifically for getting rid of smells. She does sometimes but usually forgets.

One day she sprayed something in our room(not sure if it was perfume or some other product) and it spread, as usual, throughout the entire room. I was coughing a bit, which already set her off and made her think I was overreacting. I asked her not to spray stuff in our room, mentioning that I'd done so before. She got all defensive with me, so I just asked instead if she could at least open our window. She refused, and refused to even let me open it(I would have just opened it anyways and then left, but she would have closed it as soon as I was gone). I turned our fan on(one of those standing ones) and left the door open.

Later that night when I came to go to bed, I could still smell whatever she had sprayed. It was strong enough that I could feel a headache starting to build, so I took my things and went to sleep on the couch in the basement. I don't necessarily mind sleeping down there, it's comfy and nice to have my own space, but the part that I'm irritated about is how I was forced out of my own room because of her. I've had to do things in the past to accomodate her, and it just feels like she can't do the same for me. My parents both think I'm overreacting, and maybe I am, but I just don't see what's so wrong about me asking her to use it somewhere else, somewhere that it won't be a problem for anyone. AITA?