u/Phobia_Spoiders

So a company near me has multiple positions open rn that I technically meet the requirements for (I have the schooling but no work experience in the field, but they're entry level and on paper don't seem to require work experience).

Two of the posted jobs are at one location about 45 mins away. They're more tailored to what I went to school for (entry level lab tech and lab assistant), but the distance and schedule (night shift) aren't ideal (but I'd take it if offered, experience is experience and money is money), and I'm a bit nervous about the lab tech opening because of my lack of experience. (I'm nervous about any job though lol I'm anxious and neurodivergent.)

There is one job opening about 10-15 minutes away from me for an entry-level phlebotomist that's day shift. Obviously more convenient currently. I feel like I'd be considered for that more than the others based on their preferred experience, but it's obviously not what I went to school for. I've been having career choice doubts anyway, so I'm not necessarily against trying it.

I'd like to apply to one of the jobs at the location 45 mins away and also the phlebotomy job just to see what happens because I still may be rejected at one or both and don't want to miss out on the other opportunities. But I also am not sure how that would look to the company?

I’ve been trying to lower the number of clutter items I have because the sheer amount of items I have to move to even start dusting is overwhelming and makes me not want to dust, on top of the usual executive dysfunction drama. And then I have to worry about dusting the books on my bookshelf. My desk. The blinds, the walls, the baseboards, the everything. My room is small and the layout I’ve had to go with makes it harder to dust, but I don’t really have a good way of rearranging things to make it better. I’m in an old house and the position of my bedroom is the worst for collecting all the dust from the rest of the house, AND I have a cat. There’s so much dust and fur like two minutes after dusting and doing this daily is a nightmare that I’m lucky to remember but struggle to do even when it doesn’t slip my mind.

I’ve seen many discussions from us about dishes and laundry but I haven’t really seen anyone talk about dusting (or I’ve missed it, very possible).

I’m so mad at myself. Idk how I did it. It was such a basic question: name your last three jobs, how long you worked there, and why you left. I was so nervous (I have anxiety and this was my first big girl job interview, before it’s just been retail) and got caught up in remembering the dates exactly that I just completely forgot to mention my reasons for leaving. Idk how big a deal this is going to be for this but the interview was honestly chill otherwise but I can’t imagine it looks good to mess up one of the easiest possible questions in existence. Do I bring it up in an email or let it go because it’s a minor thing idk.

Also I’m assuming this whole interview I just did was like a “making sure you’re human and actually interested” thing because most of the questions were along that line, only the last three (of 10) seemed like the usual interview questions (like what is a mistake you made at a past job and how did you fix it etc.)

I could’ve sworn I saved some tarantulas but I don’t have a single one in my storage. Help please! I can look through my storage for anything you might need. I especially have some modern day tech/infrastructure items like cars and such that I’m not using for my island that you are welcome to take if you need.

Does anyone else here struggle to trust your own judgement about actions or situations that seem bad/wrong? Idk if this is really a neurodivergent thing specifically (also for added context I’m diagnosed adhd but I’m not 100% sure if I’m autistic or not) or if I’ve just given myself a complex growing up due to the people I grew up around and me having low self esteem and/or missing details.

An example of what I’m attempting to describe with that is like on paper, it’s wrong to do X. You see someone do X and so you think that’s wrong. But then no one else is bothered by it and treats you like you’re crazy or wrong for finding that behavior wrong. I’d like to think I’m not super rigid on following rules to a T in the sense that I believe bad/harmful rules should be broken and life is full of nuance, but also rules are there for a reason and help keep order.

My gut tells me it’s wrong, and I’m often proven right, but sometimes I am genuinely missing some extra little piece of context that should explain it all away, so I’m left never knowing if I should trust my gut or assume I’m missing context. I end up working overtime trying to analyze these situations as they’re occurring and it adds an extra subtle layer of exhaustion on top of everything else I struggle with in my daily attempts at cosplaying a normal functioning human. It ends up making it difficult for me to advocate for myself when I actually am being treated wrong, especially paired with my adhd side.

This is a mess of a post, sorry. I have a lot of things I’d like to talk about but am trying to not dump it all in one post, and I don’t really have the words for it all anyway. I’ve tried talking about this with my last therapist a few times, but she just asked for examples of when this has happened before and gone “I wonder what led to this thinking” when I provide examples but then never exploring past that. My entire experience with her was her asking me what I should tell myself in these instances but not helping guide it at all. Like gee if I knew what to tell myself I wouldn’t be spending $150 a week to see you.