u/PhoneWalletKeysID

So … 😅😬 Do we?

Someone mentioned that’s an ADHD thing, forgetting long periods of time or events. I remember bits and pieces, maybe specific events like graduation or big parties but … there are also lots of … nothing?

I had a great childhood, fun vacations, but to say I remember most of it … nope. 🙂‍↔️

We’re married, M/F, thirties, together over ten years. He had the AUDACITY to appear shocked. 🙄

Declining bedroom for several years, zero passion. He doesn’t touch me aside from sex, and only does what’s necessary to get himself off. I’ve been able to introduce a toy during to take care of myself - yippee.

I love this man to the depths of my bones. I love our life. The very LAST thing I want is to divorce, but we’ve had so many conversations that have gone nowhere. I’ve tried so many different avenues - asking what interests him, different toys, different positions, I’ve lost weight, I’ve given space. It’s not low testosterone, I really feel that he’s lazy and complacent. Is it porn? Could be. 🫩

I feel like I had to say the big “D” because nothing else was getting through to him. Now he’s not speaking to me, which is fine. I’m sick of trying to fix it. I’m sick of being the only one who cares. I’m ready to sit back and let it burn.

I have an appointment today for a check-in and I’m debating asking about other options. Currently taking generic Adderall, been on it maybe 3/4 months, I’m happy with it but I REALLY would love to find something that curbs my restlessness.

I think it’s really important to state, I am not anxious. I’m plagued by a constant desire to move, go, do, ACT, so much so that I find it impossible to ‘relax’. Sitting still makes my skin crawl. I can’t sit still and read a book or watch TV or play Barbie’s with my kiddo, and it kills me.

I’m nervous about her response - logically, that’s the RSD yapping at me. I should ask, I know I should, but does anyone else have luck with a different med and managing these symptoms?

I’ve been with my husband for eleven years, married for seven. We’re mid-thirties, one kiddo. Average suburban family. 🏠

The past few years, my husband does not like being touched or touching me. He claims doesn’t need it, doesn’t enjoy it, sex and intimacy are not high on his list of interests or priorities. He doesn’t seem to fully grasp the concept that it physically pains me to be emotionally close with him when he doesn’t desire me physically. I don’t believe his disinterest is porn or something nefarious, it’s likely a result of some medical issues he’s had the last few years and perhaps his own body image. We’ve talked the issue to death, we’ve tried many different things, and I’m slowly making peace with the fact that this is who he is and I love and support him - he truly is a great guy. Hard worker, fantastic partner, we’re emotionally very compatible, lots of shared interests and hobbies.

That being said … the rejection. The rejection is slowly eating away at me and I’m not sure how to process it in a healthy way. On top of the rejection, my brain treats the issue like a scab - it picks and picks and tries to fix it endlessly, even though logically I know that it’s not my fault and I can’t ‘fix’ it. It’s very easy then to slip into ADHD rage, which he doesn’t deserve.

Is anyone else experiencing intimate rejection from a partner and just … rolling with it? Open to all the coping methods!