TMS with chronic illness

Hello Internet friends (:

I am seeking reassurance and advice for managing symptoms from TMS treatment while managing a chronic illness

A year ago I suddenly became disabled. My doctors accused me of lying and abandoned me. I got diagnosed with POTS and hypermobility in February, and after months of experimentation I started making real strides in my improvement with Propranolol 60 mg ER. Before TMS, I could bike every day, walk a mile, and even do mentally taxing work. Yay!! I even beat my depression — while I dealt with bouts of shame and negative thinking overall I was pretty happy.

That is, until I started TMS 2 weeks ago. Now …
* I am exhausted. I can’t wake up on time. It takes hours to crawl at a bed. I can’t sit upright in a chair. I can’t leave my apartment. I feel awful
* My mood has tanked. I cry randomly. My thoughts are 100x more negative. I hate myself. I want to give up. I was so happy before TMS started. I’m miserable now.

This is brutal.

  1. Is this normal?
  2. I stick it out. Right? I just keep going.
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u/PopFormal4861 — 4 days ago

Strawberry Shortcake

🎁 Gift Link: https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/11823-strawberry-shortcake?unlocked\_article\_code=1.21A.UmkH.rcG9jhh76Eim&smid=ck-recipe-iOS-share

I don’t recommend making biscuits in your in-air conditioned apartment on a 90 degree day but here we are.

My mom grew up in a small, southern town with an annual strawberry festival. I grew up listening to tales about how much my mom looked forward to getting strawberry shortcake every year at the festival years before I ever got to taste the dish myself.

I no longer live in the south, and while my palate has expanded to the point where I don’t need everything I eat doused in either ketchup or butter I still yearn for some of the dishes of my childhood.

Turns out I like making biscuits. I guess I come from a long line of biscuit-making women. Up next: an attempt at a hot honey chicken biscuit.

I really like this recipe. I am not an accomplished baker and was shocked that it turned out pretty damn okay. Your results will likely be better than mine.

u/PopFormal4861 — 14 days ago

Hetty Lui Mckinnon’s dumpling salads

I sinned against the author by using shrimp dumplings instead of sticking to the vegetarian motif, but it was delicious anyways.

I highly recommend making the tomato one while it’s still tomato season!!

u/PopFormal4861 — 27 days ago

Shalom Japan Lox Bowl

Shalom Japan’s Lox Bowl: this was one of the very first recipes I saved on the NYT Cooking app. My mother is a wannabe-Rabbi turned atheist who settled down in the Bible Belt and would treat my twin brother and I to our local, family owned Japanese restaurant as kids — this recipe feels oddly like a childhood comfort.

🎁 https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/1021207-shalom-japans-lox-bowl?unlocked\_article\_code=1.z1A.DKoS.\_eMZVR2bz6i7&smid=ck-recipe-iOS-share

u/PopFormal4861 — 28 days ago

Tomato and Peach Salad with Whipped Goat Cheese

I’ve made this before with much more attention to copying the look of the NYT photo, but tonight I was in a rush and decided to go with the ingredients I had on hand with the presentation from my own invention.

Seen here are the finest heirloom tomatoes that Whole Foods has to offer and two peaches that had yet to fully ripen despite setting in my fridge for a week. I could not for the life of me source purslane, mâche, or watercress — nor did I want to risk anything green in this moment. So we opted for radicchio and added the green with a pop of scallions.

The dressing is this beautiful sherry vinaigrette that I would eat with most things.

Bone apple tea
🎁 https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/1020367-tomato-and-peach-salad-with-whipped-goat-cheese?unlocked\_article\_code=1.zFA.uQ4u.yt6wo\_jt85hw&smid=ck-recipe-iOS-share

u/PopFormal4861 — 1 month ago

Steak Diane and Martha Stewart’s Mashed Potatoes

Sometimes…you are really going through it and you spend hours the night before crying til you can’t breathe and it’s the one year anniversary of calling the national domestic abuse hotline and leaving your shitty abusive ex and you’re remembering how you made him *both* steak diane and lobster thermidore for valentines and you eventually calm yourself to sleep and the next day your therapist’s voice is in your head telling you to be kind to yourself.

presenting: Steak Diane by Mellisa Clark
🎁 https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/1023898-steak-diane?unlocked\_article\_code=1.zFA.5MIy.TbCY9UKUkI4f&smid=ck-recipe-iOS-share

This is my go to dish to impress a date or myself. I am abysmal at cooking steak so go ahead and sue me for my doneness here. I am trying my best.

I am sober so I chose the cheapest, smallest bottle of cognac I could find at the state liquor store. I did not flambé the cognac because I don’t think my landlord would like that, nor do I have that much faith in their handiwork.

Also, presenting: Martha Stewart’s Mashed Potstoes
🎁 https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/1026245-martha-stewarts-mashed-potatoes?unlocked\_article\_code=1.zFA.q0Q9.tqOsA5wTueXM&smid=ck-recipe-iOS-share

I’m from a “holler” in the south so I grew up with mashed potatoes that were mostly dairy. This Martha Stewart recipe was the closest I could find to how my mom makes them.

Conclusion: I am a cultured woman but there’s nothing like meat and potatoes that makes a gal happy.

u/PopFormal4861 — 1 month ago

Tomato and Burrata Salad with Chile Crisp by Hetty Lui McKinnon

I don’t know where y’all live but here it is 95F and 90% humidity so I consider it a moral sin to turn my stove on. Thankfully, there is no shortage of flavorful and versatile salads to make from the NYT app.

This was a huge hit for me. Simple. Easy. More flavor than anticipated. I figured it would need soy sauce and rice vinegar — but it doesnt.

🎁 https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/1027233-tomato-and-burrata-salad-with-chile-crisp?unlocked_article_code=1.uFA.EYcN.mi1KCz6KONaY&smid=ck-recipe-iOS-share

u/PopFormal4861 — 2 months ago

Lemon Ricotta Pancakes w/ Blueberry Syrup 🍋🫐🥞

I personally believe pancakes and waffles should be banned from the American breakfast table and instead served as dessert, but it’s summer and I’m fabulously unemployed — I can wake up at 11am, lazily make my pour over while I watch my daily mahjong video, and destroy my kitchen by testing out a new recipe.

A disaster happened right as I was about to offer up the initial sacrificial pancake: I was out of butter. I can’t remember the last time I didn’t have an emergency box of butter hiding somewhere in my freezer but alas here I was, batter ready to go, and not a tab of butter anywhere in my kitchen. So these pancakes were cooked in Giant Eagle branded oil cooking spray. Sue me.

at first, I was really disappointed that the batter yielded only three large sized pancakes, but it was only after I had gorged myself on half of them that I realize that it was quite a filling recipe.

These are delicious and a real treat for a lazy Sunday morning. for me it’s in the category of like a nice Mother’s Day brunch recipe or something you’re doing to impress a date.

u/PopFormal4861 — 2 months ago

Chez Panisse’s Blueberry Cobbler

I don’t have a baking bone in my body, so I was surprised that even a buffon such as I could manage the biscuits in this cobbler. I grew up in the south (in a holler for those playing along) and used to eat my great aunt’s blueberry cobbler on our front porch in rocking chairs watching the storms roll in.

This cobbler is not my great aunt’s recipe but damn does it come close.

I recommend this recipe for those of you who have little kids because I bet they’d love forming the biscuits — it’s very tactile and fun and reminds me of play-doh.

This dessert is best eaten with vanilla ice cream.

Blueberries are in season and cheap at my local grocery stores so give it a go if you’re up for it!!

Gift: https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/9291-chez-panisses-blueberry-cobbler?unlocked\_article\_code=1.p1A.hqA-.HIPVKT9ep1Sf&smid=ck-recipe-iOS-share

u/PopFormal4861 — 2 months ago
▲ 1 r/POTS

Explain to me like I'm 5: When to be concerned about high blood pressure in hyperPOTS

Full transparency: I am an anxious person and have medical OCD. Despite being aware of this and the ways my mind creates all kinds of logical fallacies, I am still susceptible to my own anxiety.

A series of unfortunate events brought me into a flare this past weekend: a mild sinus infection, a long bike ride, the start of fludrocortisone, and some sexual harassment that had me spending all day Saturday filing a police report.

Monday I had an 8am gastro appointment after less than 6 hours of sleep and a stressful weekend. They measured my BP at 150/104 — the gastro doctor was concerned and asked me if I wanted to go to the ER. I attempted to remain calm and brush it off as me being anxious and stressed, but since both the doctor and the nurse were considering sending me to there ER I full on spiraled. I stopped the fludrocortisone that done.

Monday/Tuesday were rest days for me mostly in bed and/or sleeping. I was in a flare and my resting HR was elevated by 30bpm. I was having some chest pain (maybe GERD or muscular) and started having a kind of frontal tension headache Tuesday.

Tuesday night I took my BP and it was 129/77.

Wednesday morning I took my BP and it was 122/67.

Wednesday at 1pm after a short walk and 10 minute rest I took my BP and it was 154/105.

I freaked out. I googled my symptoms. My chest pain worsened and I started having trouble breathing. I called 911. The paramedics came and confirmed my BP was 150+/100+, but told me it was "just anxiety"

They took me to the ER anyways where an EKG, blood work, CT scan, and xray confirmed I my and my heart were perfectly healthy.

I feel like a big dumb dumb.

I don't understand when I'm supposed to take action against my BP and when I'm supposed to chill and wait it out. I don't understand if this is dangerous or not. I don't know what kind of treatment to advocate for. I'm so confused and scared.

I have called my cardiologist and am seeing them tomorrow but they don't really believe in hyperPOTS and refuse to treat me for it.

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u/PopFormal4861 — 3 months ago
▲ 13 r/POTS

In a flare following PTSD trigger, seeking reassurance and advice tw: sexual coercion

hi friends ((:

The perfect storm happened: I was mildly sick with some kind of sinus infection or cold, I attempted my first real bike ride since becoming disabled a year ago, I started a new med (fludrocortisone), and then…my dentist of six years trapped me alone in a room and attempted to coerce me to have sex with him. He had been harassing me—calling and texting—nonstop for days now.

I’m a mess. Yesterday I only got less than 6 hours of sleep and had an 8am gastro appointment. My blood pressure measured 150/104 when I walked in (hyperPOTS, anxiety) and the doctor triggered a massive panic attack by asking if I wanted to go to the ER.

My resting HR yesterday was in the 80s/90s for hours despite total bed rest. I couldn’t get my body to calm down.

I finally broke out of the flare around 11pm and got my resting HR down to the 60s (I am on propranaolol)

I slept until 2pm today. My BP was 129/77 so I know I’m okay.

I feel awful. Tired. I have a slight headache in my temples on and off. My stomach hurts and I threw up three times yesterday. I have some tingling sensations in the back of my head.

I filed a police report and a report with this dental licensing board. He texted and called me from the office line to harass me and I have so much evidence.

But god. My body. This has been a huge blow to me.

Can someone reassure me that I can bounce back from this??

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u/PopFormal4861 — 3 months ago

Eyeshadow palettes, products, and tips for pride makeup

Hi (:

I am a high-femme, unfortunately straight-presenting woman looking to leverage her makeup addiction to smooch hot women during Pride Month. I'm also interested in pushing myself out of my comfort zone a bit and attempt makeup looks beyond my typical everyday makeup.

I've seen folk rock bold, rainbow eye looks for pride. I'm hoping to do something similar, but I'm not sure what products to spring for.

I'm eyeing the ColourPop Fade Into Hue palette, but it doesn't have a matte orange nor does it seem all that pigmented. I'm following Blend Bunny on IG and it seems their iconic Blends palette may be back in stock in time for me to order in advance of June.

Are there any other rainbow eye palettes or products (like a collection of pencils, graphic eyeliners, etc) that I should look at? And, do folk have ideas on specific looks?

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u/PopFormal4861 — 3 months ago