u/PrettyView3572

Ai tell mama ai wanna watch da Robin Hood wid da hansum fox, but den dere all dese hoomans?! She say “you said da wun wid Jamie Foxx!” Silly dumdum mama. At least she gets me my costooom for watchin da moobie wid da frens, ai guess!

(Robin Hood is one of my favorite stories, so I’ve watched a few of them too recently. The 2018 Taron Egerton/Jamie Foxx one was available for free, so that’s what we’re watching, and the joke was right there 🤣🤣)

Frens, ai Toffee Da Gud Gurl Doggo needs youse help to deecide wedder or no to soo mama.

Heer wut happen. Mai mama do an Abandonation fur da hole fureber. Mediate SOO rite? But den, Mai auntie an uncle pick me up an takes me on AVENTURE! (Dat pitchah one). Mebbe no soo?

But! Ai no loud to eats da catto fuds in pitchah one. An den Dey takes me walkies wen it feel like rain (pitchah two) and brings me home again (pitchah tree), wich berry suspishuss. BIG SOO!

MUSH MUSH laters, mama come home. Ai do a Vestigate (dat da last pitchah) an she gib walkies an cookie. Ai no deecide yet wedder ai forgib.

So what tink, frens?? Soo mama fur bandon, an auntie an uncle fur not gib catto fud??

Dis toosdie is berry big day: it Moobie Toosdie, it Leckshun Day heer, an it mai barkday! Ai Toffee da Gud Gurl Doggo is turnin 6 hooman years, an ai wud likes to cellbrate wid all mai ICBGC frens!

We can watch da moobie heer on mai cowch, but you has to bring youse own hoomans if you want snuggles. Mama may only snuggle wid me!

Ai will has bockses fur da cattos, an nip an churus. Ai will has treatos an chimkin fur all da frens, an soff blankies an pillows fur naps!

Ai hopes you comes to mai moobie party!

Lub, Toffee

Pee Ess: Dis pitchah show off mai cowch an mai fabrit blankie!

No, is juss de doggo park. But it berry green, like mai harness! Mama say ai looks like Elf-bubbah in mai green harness, speshully nest to my floofy frens. Does you like mai hat??

Lub, Tophaba da Witch (it me Toffee da Gud Gurl Doggo!)

Mama say Toffee, you runs fast like velociraptor, an you has too long nails like velociraptor. An you is Always In Charge like Blue! So she makes me da Blue Toffeeraptor fur da moobie. Ai hopes we all gets out ob da park ok!

Henlo frens, is me Toffee da Gud Gurl (almost 6F).

As we all nose, ai is ushully a berry brave gurl, but today ai gots a big fraid, an ai still recobering! Mine granpawrents is bisitin cuz dey say mama dee-wreck moosical, dat wai mama gone all da timez. But really Dey heer to see me, ob corse.

Anydaze, Dey brings me Toffee da nummy treatos but Dey also brings in smelly plants wid a FLY! Ai Toffee am berry berry ascare ob flies. Mine gramma try to kill fly, she miss. Mine mama try to kill fly, she miss. Dey say “we no see da fly Toffee Bear, mebbe it ded.” BUT IT NO DED. After many forebers, mama kill da fly, but ai Toffee am still berry pupset. Mama gib Calmin Treato an stick me in Tunder Shurt, but ai still cry an shake. Finally da treato wurk, an now ai takes nap on Big Bed. But still tink ai shud soo fly an Mebbe granpawrents fur bringin it in mine howse! You tinks ai has a case?

Pitchah is me cotemplaytin a soo

(My parents bought me flowers for opening night of my community theater show, and a fly came in with them! Toffee is truly terrified of flies, so she freaked ALL the way out and couldn’t calm down even after I killed it. Thank goodness for calming treats for my poor anxious baby!)

Mine mama call me Feral Princess, so it make purrfeck sense ai be da Princess Toffeecup fur moobie toosdie 👑

Ai lub errybuddy’s pitchahs so far!

Ai noes many ob us doggos hates da baff, witch is why we shud all soo da mamas an pawthers so dey can nebber gib baffs again! Mine mama juss gib me baff two furebers ago (it’s been two months, Toffee) an now ai gets anudder one!

Ai was berry gud gurl an didn’t try to leab da tub, an wut ai gets?? All mine good smells is gone, an she steal mine furs! (I just brushed you, Toffee, it’s not my fault you’re shedding so much). Shhh mama, dis Toffee time.

An now, moss embarr-ambarss-worss ob all, ai has to wears da baff robe! Mama say ai berry berry cyoot, but is un-dig-fied for pupperina like me.

Ai deserb da compensayshun fur all ob dis. Wut you tink ai shud soo fur, frens?

Gud Gurl Toffee, amoss 6F

Well, mebbe if Dey is mean to me, den ai be fraid.

Dis me Toffee bustin ghosts! Ai ask mama to put me in da lady ghostsbustin moobie, but we likes the men one too. Ai can’t waits to see all mine frens moobies an pitchahs!

My cart feels…incomplete. What am I missing?

In the cart:
strawberry jam,
no shrubs,
beginner’s luck,
grotto,
back to the fuschia.

I already own:
Scorchy,
grenadine,
drugstore chocolate,
read,
radical compassion,
Guava have it
Peachy pink
I’m shy
Thin ice
Start to finish
Artistic expression
Don’t teal my thunder
On shuffle

Current Grenadine mani for funsies

Ai no unnerstan wut happen frens, but ai has mine hat for be safes!

Dis moobie toosdie were berry eggciting! Ai lubbed seein ebryone’s stories an aventures, but now ai tink it time for naps. Anybunny else wanna nap an cuddle puddle wid me? Ai has bockses fur da kitties too!

Lub, Toffee (good girl doggo and treato factory fan)

Ai Toffee da doggo got to da treato factory! Eberyting made for doggos an cattos, an it all taste like chimken an cheesez an peanubuttah 🤩 dis me doin an eggcite wid mister wonka

Hemlo frens, Good Girl Doggo Toffee here. Ai is in need of a pawtorney!

As you can sees from dis ebidence, mine mama no gib any ob her chimkin. She say, “Toffee, you just eated youse dindin,” but ai no want mine dindin, ai wants Mama’s dindin. Ai was berry gud girl and no did a steal, so ai deserb compensashun!

Ai tinkin ai soo for elebenty million treatos and sum chimkin. An mebbe sum cheeses too. What de pawtorneys tink ob dat??

(I ordered Chinese food for dinner, and Toffee was FIXATED 🤣)

Hims was in da tree across da street, starin at all the doggos! Some da udder doggos did a big bork, but Hims no moob! Ai kept my cooool, ob corse.

Toffee, 5F Good Girl doggo

Ai wanted to match mine cuzzin Jimmy (u/milavaneela) for da moobie day, so ai got mine mama to makes me a costoom! Ai is Toff2-D2!! So excite for moobie toosdie 🤩

Toff2-D2 (teehee, is me Toffee Good Girl)