u/PrissyPeachQueen

I (bisexual femme) fear that my best friend (also bisexual femme) in my 20s was the love of my life. We would kiss, cuddle, even had some sexual moments, but we would always swear we were just best friends. You could cut the tension with a knife. We were SO close, we lived together for two years and it was a sapphic sleepover that never ended. I just loved her so much. Then she moved cities, got a boyfriend, and a few months later completely ghosted me. She sent me a nasty text insulting me and then blocked me everywhere before I even responded. We've never spoken since. She cut off our mutual friends too.

That was years ago and I'm still not over it, honestly. I haven't had a serious relationship since because nothing has come close to the level of intimacy I had with her. I've never stopped craving it. I miss her so much it hurts, and I'm afraid no one will ever love me like that again -- even though I understand that someone who truly loved me wouldn't discard me.

We never admitted what was going on between us and I feel like I'm insane for still being hung up on it. I'm embarrassed that I haven't let go. I don't want to talk to her or see her. I don't know what I need to move on from this. It just hurts so much that she would forgive crappy men over and over for egregious behavior and she threw me away without a conversation.

I feel so dramatic and pathetic for this and I guess I'm just wondering if anyone else is a homoerotic bestie survivor who's managed to move on, and how they did it.

Cue "Valentine" by Snail Mail

I'm on the autism spectrum and have never really understood what normal, healthy, tolerable, reasonable ​expectations should be in interpersonal relationships. I've experienced a lot of abusive and toxic friendships and romances and I really struggle to recognize (and then act accordingly) when something isn't right.

I've been dating someone the last few months who is extremely emotionally healthy and is a huge positive in my life! And it's holding a mirror up to many of friendships that I've realized do not spark joy, to say the least.

I'm kind of sad that i'm nearing 30 and still don't know so much about what friendships should look like. I'm disappointed in myself for tolerating some bs behavior from "close friends." And I don't know what the appropriate thing to do from here is. Do I just stop talking to people? Do I try to have a conversation with them? How do I know when it's worth trying to salvage vs when it's an insurmountable friction based on differences in our core personalities?

I love people who are quirky, march to the beat of their own drum, and are complex. However I struggle to discern fun-weird from weird-weird and I keep getting into ridiculous dramas with people and their deeply strange issues that I saw a mile away and (wrongly) decided were harmless idiosyncrasies.

​I know I have a role in this and dont want to come across like i'm blaming everyone else for a pattern in my life. I'm trying to understand what exactly it is and would love any insight from people who've done some hard looking in the mirror.

I think part of it is that I hang on for too long because I'm scared of things ending and people leaving me, but I dont yet have the self awareness of what's drawing me to these people in the first place.

I want to open up space in my world for more people like the person i'm dating. I don't have room for them right now because my battery is constantly being drained by managing incompatible and unhealthy friendships.

I graduated with a BS in geology in 2020, went to one year of a MS hydrogeo program 2021-2022, and dropped out because I developed a chronic illness. I've worked part-time odd jobs over the last several years.

Anyway by a miracle I went into remission and am thinking about re-entering the field. But my resume is a disaster. Except for college internships and a failed attempt at a RA/TA position, I've never worked in the field, so i'm 28 and 5 years out from any relevant ecperience.

I don't know how/if to explain this, what references to use, how i'll be received. I'm a bit insecure I guess. I don't know if my skills have atrophied too much or if I've missed out on substantial technology changes.

Any advice? Has this ship sailed? ​

My life got all messed up and I need a new path. I have a bachelor's in geology and little desire to use it.

I know a couple of people who did 1.5 year long ABSN programs and it seems to be a total sufferfest, but they both have great lifestyles (although with some significant drawbacks) as a result.

From my POV as an outsider, the pros are that it's a pretty short time investment to get a very versatile degree and has a lot of room for flexibility. Working PRN and creating your own schedule, working 3x12 with 4 days off, travel nursing, switching between specialties, possibility of remote work. I would LOVE a job with that much wiggle room. And entry pay would be higher than I would ever make as a geologist even late in a career.

Cons that ive observed are that working in healthcare can be genuinely traumatic and there doesn't seem to be much support, hours can be brutal, emotionally draining, and the ABSN programs look like actual hell to me and are expensive.

What else should I consider? Do your best to talk me in or out of it!

drum roll... a hypomanic episode!

I've long experienced mental health symptom imperatives (shoutout anxiety and panic attacks) but this was just, wow. I've had blips of hypomania pop up over the last year, but I was always able to dispel it within a day, and all my usual strategies failed this time. I'm honestly pretty rattled by the experience. I did two self-hypnoses and I think I figured out what's underneath it -- that I feel a lot of shame about past behavior in high-risk unsafe situations, and the part of me that helped me survive resents the scorn I feel toward it. I don't even know where to begin dealing with this. Wide open to suggestions.

Does anyone have experience with extreme mental health symptom imperatives like this? Any other bipolar folks in the chat?

I'm thinking it may be possible to treat the bipolar like another "TMS" or whatever you want to call it. Anyone try this approach for more severe mental health conditions like mania, psychosis, etc?

Hi all! I'm back to celebrate the one-year anniversary of my recovery from Long Covid (ME/CFS, dysautonomia, mast cell disease, etc). If want the full story, here it is: This week marks 6 months of 100% recovery : r/LongHaulersRecovery

The tl;dr is that I watched a Dr. Sarno video on TMS and had a conversation with a personification of my Long Covid, which I visualized as a snake wrapped around my brainstem while I was really high a few years before. I explained to it how much it was hurting me and asked it to let me go, and it listened.

I've maintained my wellness by journaling (shoutout to Nicole Sachs), trauma release exercises, EMDR, and an uncomfortable amount of introspection. For the first time in my life, I actually believe that I am in the driver's seat of my body.

I'm generally in the Cell Danger Response camp of ME/CFS. I will never know why I was sick, what was happening in my body, or why talking to an imaginary snake made it go away. BUT, it did, and I'm here to share the good news that I made it an entire year without PEM. My hypermobility is much better too. My baseline pain level is a 0, which hasn't been the case since... childhood?

I dealt with really severe anxiety, panic attacks, and night terrors for the first 9 months of my recovery. I'm happy to report that over the last couple of months, this has largely subsided. I credit it to EMDR and some absolutely feral trauma releases. I don't get riled up as easily. Irritations roll off me more readily. I don't ruminate as much, and I don't worry about perfection anymore.

I got COVID over the holidays and had some symptoms flare up for a few weeks. Not PEM or severe fatigue, but some autonomic stuff and a few allergy symptoms. I recovered smoothly. With it in mind that Long Covid happens when the sickness cycle doesn't complete, I drew a bunch of circles throughout the days and did yoga routines that start and end in the same position. I also accepted that I couldn't strong-arm my way out of being sick, and that I had to just let go of control and allow it to do its thing. Weird, yeah, but it worked; that's been the case for pretty much everything else I've done.

I'm tapering off of levothyroxine for my idiopathic hypothyroidism that onset while I was sick. So far, so good.

I had some (probable) mast cell issues before COVID, and those have flared up on 3 occasions over the last year, but they quickly returned to my baseline of no symptoms. I don't have to restrict my diet at all. I continue to take Xolair because sometimes physical and emotional stressors can flare up symptoms. It's infrequent and still profoundly less problematic than it ever was before I got COVID, but I like having the guardrails. Xolair doesn't prevent reactions, but it blunts the severity of symptoms. It's not the reason I'm in remission. It just makes my life a little less bumpy, and also I love that I don't have seasonal allergies, so anyone can pry it out of my cold dead hands.

I'm re-reading The Mindbody Prescription by Dr. Sarno this week. I like having the reminders and it's kind of a comfort book at this point lol. I also got a celebratory fro-yo with a grotesque amount of toppings because that was one of the things I was most excited about being able to eat again last year.

I'm doing great :)

Hi all! I'm back to celebrate the one-year anniversary of my recovery from Long Covid (ME/CFS, dysautonomia, mast cell disease, etc). If you missed my recovery story, here it is: This week marks 6 months of 100% recovery : r/LongHaulersRecovery

The tl;dr is that I watched a Dr. Sarno video on TMS and had a conversation with a personification of my Long Covid, which I visualized as a snake wrapped around my brainstem while I was really high a few years before. I explained to it how much it was hurting me and asked it to let me go, and it listened.

I've maintained my wellness by journaling (shoutout to Nicole Sachs), trauma release exercises, EMDR, and an uncomfortable amount of introspection. For the first time in my life, I actually believe that I am in the driver's seat of my body.

I'm generally in the Cell Danger Response camp of ME/CFS. I will never know why I was sick, what was happening in my body, or why talking to an imaginary snake made it go away. BUT, it did, and I'm here to share the good news that I made it an entire year without PEM. IMy hypermobility is much better too. My baseline pain level is a 0, which hasn't been the case since... childhood?

I dealt with really severe anxiety, panic attacks, and night terrors for the first 9 months of my recovery. I'm happy to report that over the last couple of months, this has largely subsided. I credit it to EMDR and some absolutely feral trauma releases. I don't get riled up as easily. Irritations roll off me more readily. I don't ruminate as much, and I don't worry about perfection anymore.

I got COVID over the holidays and had some symptoms flare up for a few weeks. Not PEM or severe fatigue, but some autonomic stuff and a few allergy symptoms. I recovered smoothly. With it in mind that Long Covid happens when the sickness cycle doesn't complete, I drew a bunch of circles throughout the days and did yoga routines that start and end in the same position. I also accepted that I couldn't strong-arm my way out of being sick, and that I had to just let go of control and allow it to do its thing. Weird, yeah, but it worked; that's been the case for pretty much everything else I've done.

I'm tapering off of levothyroxine for my idiopathic hypothyroidism that onset while I was sick. So far, so good.

I had some (probable) mast cell issues before COVID, and those have flared up on 3 occasions over the last year, but they quickly returned to my baseline of no symptoms. I don't have to restrict my diet at all. I continue to take Xolair because sometimes physical and emotional stressors can flare up symptoms. It's infrequent and still profoundly less problematic than it ever was before I got COVID, but I like having the guardrails. Xolair doesn't prevent reactions, but it blunts the severity of symptoms. It's not the reason I'm in remission. It just makes my life a little less bumpy, and also I love that I don't have seasonal allergies, so anyone can pry it out of my cold dead hands.

I'm re-reading The Mindbody Prescription by Dr. Sarno this week. I like having the reminders and it's kind of a comfort book at this point lol. I also got a celebratory fro-yo with a grotesque amount of toppings because that was one of the things I was most excited about being able to eat again last year.

I'm doing great :)

ETA: Please ask your questions in the comments here! I love y'all but I get the same DMs over and over lol it's just more efficient if one person asks and then everyone else with the same question can read my answer!

So I'm coming up on one year of recovery from Long Covid (me/cfs et al) and I still mask with a n95 pretty staunchly, although I'm much less stringent than pre-recovery. I'll take risks sometimes for important things, but I don't go out to restaurants or bars regularly.

I honestly don't see myself never masking on planes, at hospitals, in grocery stores again because I just really like that I don't get sick lol (also for some of my personal political leanings). It's also important to me to protect other people who care about this and still mask. But I'm honestly really tired of the level of stringency I'm at, especially in social contexts.

I've gotten covid since my recovery and it messed me up for about a month. I did fully recover again afterwards, but it was a very unpleasant and stressful experience that I'm reluctant to stop avoiding. After what I've been through, I want to spend as few days sick in bed as humanly possible. I also would feel pretty terrible if my not masking was the reason someone else went through this.

I also think it's not great for my identity to still be the mask person everywhere I go, and honestly it just sucks to miss out on things, or to be visually the odd one out. It's a hard balance.

How are people navigating this? No judgment, just curious:)

edit: for context i have been pretty hard-core covid conscious since 2022