I am financially fucked.
I finally sat down and acknowledged how much debt I have. For the longest time I treated my lifestyle/spending habits as something normal and that "deserve ko naman". I wanted to feel I have an average life and that I can afford things, that I am not poor and I don't need to struggle. But eventually, living a life out of what you can only afford to do so will leave you financially ruined. The debts I have was all because of material things I always wanted to have when I was a kid and the things I never experienced. Growing up poor made a lasting impact on me in a negative way - to want things so badly instead of working hard to get them. I have never learned about delayed gratification and would never know how to apply them to anything in my life until now that I am 28. Ever since I started working, I always wanted to have things that would make my life easier - new phone, computer, household items, buying foods online, anything just to feel I am capable of achieving a status - a societal status that I have normalized for the past years and always failed to acknowledge that I am not something yet. I should be thinking about achieving goals like others do - as simple as saving money to buy a new laptop but I am ashamed to acknowledge that "saving money" has never been in my vocabulary, it's a thought that would never cross my mind, even makes me ick thinking about not spending my money on something the moment I have it. I think I have conditioned my mind that I can afford anything, purchasing anything under installments, telling myself that I wouldn't even realize I already paid them off after months or even a year. Installments after installments piled up, loan after loan topped one after another. For someone like me that has been earning about 25k average a month for the past years, I know I should already be haunted with even having 100k of debt in my name, but I still didn't care the fact. I just thought I have these platforms to loan money from so I'll be okay. If I need something there's Spay to help me get that item I heartfully desire, Billease is there If I'm short on money. I can pay them all anyway, voices in my head always tells me.
I just made a spreadsheet to track down my overall debts before writing this, I just added below the total for each month that I need to settle until I become debt free. It's now totaling 334k across BillEase / Uno Loan / Gloan / Sloan / Spay / SAVii / HomeCredit / SSS and others. Not to mention my monthly bills of about 18k for food/rent/electricity etc. My monthly income is now averaging 50k but paying all my debts off will still be a struggle - a struggle I decided to finally face and change my habits for the better. I'm starting it with first acknowledging how fucked I am right now, that I did this to myself and I should face the consequences.
Sorry for the large block of texts. For all those that finally became debt-free, can you please share how'd you do it? Thank you in advance and let's all commit to being debt-free in the next few months!
| ₱ 58,459.86 | Aug 2026 |
|---|---|
| ₱ 47,801.77 | Sept 2026 |
| ₱ 39,330.35 | Oct 2026 |
| ₱ 31,094.88 | Nov 2026 |
| ₱ 31,334.84 | Dec 2026 |
| ₱ 25,361.25 | Jan 2027 |
| ₱ 22,493.46 | Feb 2027 |
| ₱ 20,160.67 | Mar 2027 |
| ₱ 20,160.67 | April 2027 |
| ₱ 19,755.67 | May 2027 |
| ₱ 9,500.67 | June 2027 |
| ₱ 9,500.67 | July 2027 |
| ₱ 7,516.00 | Aug 2027 |
| ₱ 7,516.00 | Sept 2027 |
| ₱ 7,516.00 | Oct 2027 |
| ₱ 334,954.76 | TOTAL |
PS. I do not have any gambling addiction, these are all due to bad spending habits + lack of financial literacy.