405 days abstinent... worried I'll regret breaking it. Looking for perspective
​
I've been intentionally abstinent for about 405 days after a difficult breakup. Over that time, I've done a lot of healing and self-reflection, and I've recently started exploring my sexuality and becoming more open to new experiences.
Tomorrow I may meet up with someone I connected with online. It could also involve my first experience in the swinger lifestyle.
Part of me is excited, but another part is wondering if I'm rushing into a situation just because I've been abstinent for so long. I don't want to make a decision just to "end the streak" if that's what's really driving me.
For those who've broken a long period of abstinence, especially after a breakup or while exploring something new, did you regret it? What helped you know you were actually ready versus just caught up in the moment?
I choose abstinence as a way to heal post longterm breakup, I feel like Im ready to shed this era of my life but I'm not scared of restarting the streak either. It's my first one but I'm not scared of it being my last one