u/PuzzleheadedTune1366

Hello,

i messed up pretty badly and would like some advice.

So, i came to Germany at the end of 2014 to finish my language courses and to study. After trying it up with medicine, i decided to instead study maths in 2016. Fast forward to 2020, I received my bachelor degree in math with a minor in mechanical engineering. Instead of finishing my studies in 2021, i decided to go along and finish to masters degrees: one in math and another one in mechanical engineering in 2022. These were the fields that i loved. It just felt right.

My plan was to become a computation/simulation/software engineering at one of these top automotive companies. By the time i finished my studies, however, i was so tired and decided to stay at the companies i worked at as a working student in software development for 4 years. There i was offered a job as an embedded systems developer in the electromobility branch.

This was not my goal, but due to depression/burnout, i took the offer in 2022. First two months, no salary. Why? Company is going down! Then, insolvency for a year! Then company-take-over for another year. Many left the company. I also wanted to, but tried to at least get a "senior" title written on my contract before leaving. This was cut short, when the company offered severance pay to those that wanted to leave by themselves (the earliest, the higher the compensation), which i accepted.

"I have a degree in math, another in mechanical engineering. I have been working in software development for 6 years now and have knowledge in electrical engineering. Moreover, i worked in electromobility. This should open the door to every automotive company in Germany", i thought. Nope! They were letting employees leave too. VW, Bosch, Audi, ... had no single job posting on their websites.

After 6 months, i got a job at a very small company with just 2 devs in hardware/software manufacturing. I was fired 3 months later, because the employee i was working with, despite being 40 only had 2 years of experience. He lied on my behalf to hide his insecurities in 2025. This sent me into depression for 4 months. After 3 months of job search, i got another job 100 km away in software development in 2026. The project was scrapped, and i was let go during the probation period.

I am currently jobless, and seeing how all of my university friends are still holding onto their first jobs, how all have reached seniority, associates, or created their own practices. How some moved to Alliance in Munchen after studying into actuariat, some immediately got into VW as engineers, others got into quants. It seems that i am the only one that keeps turning around the drain, going nowhere.

What path would you recommend?

Thanks.

Hello, i got let go today and don't know what to do.

After working as a working student for 4 years, i officially entered the workforce in 2022 as a promising software developer, an engineer. Fast forward 2 years later, the company struggles financially, people quit, some are let go and there was an Abfindungsprogram for those that wanted to leave the company voluntarily. I took it, as i didn't see any future in this company (Company is rated at 19% recommendation on Kununu) and left.

I took a break and started looking elsewhere. Altogether, 6 months later, i got a new job at this very small company 30 Minutes from my place. The guy, i was working with treated me like crap, lied about me and got me fired, just after 3 months. As i saw that 3 other candidates before and after me got the same treatment, i licked my wounds. After 4 months of depression and 3 months of searching, i got another job. Very far from my place.

2 weeks ago, i had a talk with my supervisor. He started out of nowhere to bash my work, minimize my productivity and attributed all the success i had to others. Nothing clear came from the meeting. Today, there was another meeting. 20 minutes before, the online meeting was made local. I wrote to him, that i hadn't noticed that the meeting was a local event otherwise, i would have come to the office. In the meeting, he was the only participant. He said he wanted to cancel the contract and end my employment. Reasons given, were l had not integrated the team as fast as he expected (how do you measure that?) and that he expected more from a senior developer. He mentioned how i even asked for a salary increase. I told him that my job wasn't a senior dev. They proposed 60k + 3k bonus, i begged them to increase it to 65k. They settled for 61k + 4k bonus. He also mentioned how i was unfocused and defused (I suffer from social anxiety and panic during presentations). I begged him to get one other employee into the call for feedback, but was denied. He asked me whether i lied on my CV, to which i said the first company where i had my Probezeit skip it because of how good i was, and that i was really confused about all this.

I feel like i am cursed, nothing has been working for me. If i could farm and consume my own products, survive without working for someone, i would. Don't know what to do.

Yes, i said it!

I am tired of being seen as an evil person, or a poor person, or an uneducated person, or that one black guy hired to seem international, or a vicious person, or less of a person.

They say black people are funny? This is the only pathway to not seem like a treat. Being black, feels like starting life at a negative value. Everywhere i go in Germany, i need to prove that i am not a menace, or some ticking time-bomb, or less valuable.

Imagine having an oral exam and the professor needs to multiple times reiterate if you are at the correct place. Imagine starting your first day of work, but your colleagues thought you were a cleaner. Imagine being the punching bag for some higher up, because you look different.

I just want to be treated fairly. Want to work, go home and sleep. I do not want to stand out in crowds.

I did my bachelors, 2 masters here. The only people to whom i can talk to, and won't be looked at with these "what do you want"-eyes are well-traveled people.

I immigrated in 2014, when there were few foreigners and quickly developed body-dismorphia: being the last or only person, with whom people sit with in public transports, hurts like shit.

Tired of living life, like a lower-class citizen.

Hello,

i am a 29 years old man that had one girlfriend ... 14 years ago. Life happened, i needed to study abroad, figure myself out while surviving financially. During this time i neglected myself and deferred relationships to later points in life once i am stable enough to date.

I believe this time has arrived. The only problem is, i don't know whom to date. I would hate the person i am trying to build a life with, to be some random person. How do i know she is the one? How do i know i am the one for her? I bought the car i drive, because it is my favourite. I studied what i did, because i like them.

I am reluctant to try online dating, just to appear as one of the hundreds showing interest. Equally, i don't want to juge based on appearance and a bunch of words shown on a dating profile.

How do i get to meet her in real life? How do i know she is the one? People are really complicated.

Thanks.