My (17M) dad lost ₹13.68 Lakhs of our family's land money in F&O. Only 80k left. He is in complete denial and being abusive. What can I even do?
I am completely numb right now. I’m a college student about to join an engineering college next month (luckily got a scholarship that brings my fees down to ₹20-30k a year excluding hostel). For months, I’ve been asking my dad for a basic phone upgrade because mine is completely broken (I currently have a Redmi 9 Indian variant with a fucked up power button & screen that too is his old phone, my mom had gifted him a new phone last year on his birthday) and he kept procrastinating, saying he'd buy it later. I recently completed my class 12 and about to enter college. Today I wanted to see what's been happening to him lately so I checked his phone and found his trading account P&L. I am physically sick.
FY 23-24: -₹78,000 FY 24-25: -₹3.9 Lakhs FY 25-26: -₹7.0 Lakhs FY 26-27 (Just this June): -₹2.04 Lakhs Total Booked Loss: ~₹13.68 Lakhs (all in Derivatives/F&O)
The Context: I do not know anything about stock market or trading. We are a standard middle-class family. He got this money because he sold 4 acres of our ancestral farmland. He had around ₹20 Lakhs in cash remaining from that sale. Right now, there is only ₹80,000 left in the cupboard. I got suspicious as I've been seeing him take money almost every alternate day from the cupboard when my mom isn't home, I initially thought,"Come on, it's my own father, what can he even be doing?"
The Current Situation: My mom knows the money is missing and is fighting with him, demanding to know where it went. He isn't showing any remorse. Instead, he is fighting back like a child, screaming that "it's my money and I can do what I want." He is cursing my mom with horrific words (words such that no sane person can imagine a husband saying such things about his own wife) about her behind her back, and trying to manipulate me into believing she is just "nagging" him and she's the evil one here. My mom even got diagnosed with a lifetime heart and gastrointestinal disease, the doctor even pointed out that these diseases are MOSTLY caused by extreme stress which my father scoffed at. He doesn't stop at my mom either, he even bitches about me to my younger sister (14) as well.
I believe he is completely trapped in the revenge trading mindset and I am terrified he is going to take the final ₹80,000 and wipe it out by next week trying to get the land money back. Nowadays, he's always awake till 3AM or so doomscrolling Facebook and YouTube shorts. Whenever my mom brings up topics related to how she is struggling to save money and fund my and my sister's education, he says,"who's asking you to work? leave your job and sit at home, I'll manage everything." She's a highschool teacher in a private school.
I need immediate advice on: everything. I do not understand what to do now, I'm completely wordless.
I have attached the anonymized yearly P&L screenshot which I took from another phone. Please help me. I need to protect my mom and whatever little future we have left before I leave for college.
Edit: I forgot to add the screenshot, added now.