Those who have undergone therapy for infidelity, what have you gotten out of it?

Those who have undergone therapy for infidelity, what have you gotten out of it?

My D-Day was a bit under four months ago. It was one incident that I hid from my partner over the course of our three year relationship. BP does not want contact with me following this, and reconciliation is not on the table. One of my takeaways soon after D-Day was that I don’t want to ever hurt an intimate partner like this again, both for their sake and for my own. I’ve been intent on seeking out a therapist that’s capable of covering infidelity so I can better understand my behavior in the past and so that I have more confidence that it won’t happen in the future. Unfortunately, I’m in a position where I won’t be able to afford therapy for a long time now, which is fantastic given that I’m at the lowest point of my life.

I wanted to ask my peers in this subreddit what you've gotten out of infidelity therapy, what’s helped you or surprised you or anything that you feel is worth sharing. I’m not expecting any kind of therapeutic treatment/healing, but I’d love material that will get my brain jogging prior to beginning my own treatment, whenever that may be. I know I can Google it and get answers too, but I always like hearing from others in the moment more than I like Healthline.com articles (and I do like Healthline.com articles).

u/Recent-Pop-2412 — 8 days ago

Confirm my suspicions - is the script to this Star Wars lore video written with AI? The prose is very formulaic

Regarding rule 6 - I strongly suspect this is AI, but I'm not certain. I've seen others make mistakes calling out non-AI content online, and there's always a chance I could be one of them.

I transcribed three selections so you don't have to watch the whole video. It looks especially damning having the transcript in front of me. It's got that patronizing formula that's like nails on chalkboard to take in. The channel is Order 77, not one that I'm familiar with. I was studying and just let autoplay run me through some dork shit, ended up here. I have no issues with the guy, not here to harass him or rain on his parade. I just want to make sure I'm able to identify when AI is used, and I'd appreciate a second opinion. Selections are below with timestamps. Bold parts highlight the parts I find most suspect. Voice and graphics seem legit.

1:58 - In the golden age of the Sith, Marka Ragnos ruled the Sith Empire for over a century, and when he died, his spirit appeared to declare that the victor between Naga Sadow and Ludo Kressh would rule, because strength determined leadership. The strongest rose, while the weak fell. And every transition of power proved the new ruler deserved the position. This was not cruelty, but philosophy. The Sith order could only grow stronger if their leaders earned their place through demonstrated superiority.

6:05 - Vader discovered the suit was never meant to make him stronger, but to keep him weak. He recognized that the damaged body and constant pain were designed to ensure that the apprentice could never challenge his master. Sidious did not save Vader on Mustafar out of compassion, but allowed him to burn, and then rebuilt him weaker than before. When Vader confronted Sidious about this, gesturing to his scarred face and mechanical limbs, he asked whether these were the faces of victory. Sidious could not answer. Palpatine revealed his true philosophy when he told Vader that Vader's power was his power. This was not the rule of two, but ownership. Bane expected apprentices to grow until they could kill their masters. Palpatine expected Vader's strength to remain an extension of his own will forever. His strategy remained clear throughout his reign - maintain whatever apprentice survived as long as they remained controllable, rather than superior. Ancient Sith and Baneite traditions alike required stronger successors to replace weaker masters, but Sidious inverted this principle completely.

15:18 - "...Maul explained that the Sith took everything from him by ripping him from his Mother's arms, murdering his brother, using him as a weapon, and then casting him aside. He recalled that he once had power, but now had nothing. This was not the complaint of a failed apprentice who lost in fair combat, but the testimony of someone who was never given the chance to succeed. In the Legends novel Darth Plagueis, Sidious admitted that Maul was not an apprentice, and not someone who could ever aspire to ever become a true Sith lord, but simply someone skilled in stealth and combat who could be eliminated when no longer needed. This represented disposal through convenience, rather than succession through strength. Maul was never trained to surpass his master, but only to serve until he was no longer useful. When Obi-Wan Kenobi defeated him on Naboo, Sidious did not mourn a potential successor, but simply acquired a new tool in Count Dooku. Dooku received the same treatment, and when Anakin Skywalker proved more promising, Sidious engineered Dooku's death without hesitation. Every apprentice was disposable - every successor, temporary - every heir, designed to fail.

Bleh, spent way too much time writing this.

youtube.com
u/Recent-Pop-2412 — 9 days ago
▲ 79 r/Seattle

Share your Seattle love story

Share the details of how you met your partner in/around Seattle, if you please. I thought there may be some fun and heartwarming stories waiting to be told.

My secret agenda is that I broke up with my highschool sweetheart, I miss her, and I am not coping well. Can't imagine finding someone else, so I'd like to hear about how the rest of you in this city found companionship. :')

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u/Recent-Pop-2412 — 17 days ago

Seeking experience regarding extremely calamitous breakup

tl;dr - Very close, passionate relationship ended with sudden violence and hatred over the course of half an hour. Ex has actively sought to hurt me as much as possible in any way possible since. Looking for perspective from others who have gone through something like this and how their recovery process went.

Hi all,

A quick background on why I consider my breakup to be especially traumatic. I ended the relationship for a lot of reasons, but the big one on my mind was that she routinely gave me the silent treatment, and it often hurt more to be around her than to not. I broke up in a really poor manner (randomly jumbled out when I came home after drinking, a huge regret). We loved each other very much and shared a condo, so she stayed with me as she figured out her next steps.

The real traumatic part begins here. I asked her if she was interested in seeing anyone else, and she brought someone up. I said I was interested in seeing someone else too. She became very irritated and I left the house for a while. She locked me out but let me back in after I banged on her window. We were yelling at each other for a few minutes after this. She then did something she's never done throughout our three years together - she raised her first and beat my face in repeatedly, to the point tbat my hearing and vision were scrambled. I was violent in return, and it ended with a mutual friend picking her up. That mutual friend told her that I had cheated on her at the very beginning of our relationship and lied about it since, which was devastating for her.

She got a protective order against me based on the violence that occurred, which forced me to leave my condo, essentially making me homeless from mid February through to now. She made baseless claims about me doing meth, revenge porn, and she concealed that fact that she attacked me. We had emailing permission, in which she did everything in her power to put me down and make me feel worthless. She did not at any point claim self defense as to why she attacked me, but she has maintained that I deserved it because I was being "belligerent." That has been maybe the most destructive part of all this, that she beat me like any run-of-the-mill abuser would and still stands by her actions.

We had a close, passionate relationship with lots of love. I know it shocked her and broke her heart when I called it quits, probably raised by an order of magnitude after she discovered from someone else that I had cheated on her once and hid it. As for me, the pain she's inflicted on me in retaliation (and prior) has utterly crippled me. Nothing seems to have value anymore, and I've spent the better part of three months sobbing and largely unable to care for myself. I attribute the extreme dysregulation to the violence, betrayal, and hatred that has come of this. Has anyone been through a similar breakup and have any words of wisdom?

reddit.com
u/Recent-Pop-2412 — 17 days ago