Can't be naked in front of hubby
I have been with the same man for 15 years, married 13. He's never seen me naked in daylight. Sex is never before dark and the only light is a night light. We do have sex once or twice a week. How he has continued on with me and never even made an issue out of it is beyond me. I won't even walk around in a tshirt and panties around him. Hate my arms, legs, belly, butt, all of it....
I left an 18-year relationship that was similar, but not quite as bad. He had seen me in light, but not often. After a big weight gain and subsequent weight loss with loose skin, it got much worse. He complained about my insecurities.
I am overweight now, but even when I loose weight and am close to my healthy weight, I look terrible. Lipedema fat, sagging everything, loose skin. The thoughts of him seeing me literally makes me feel sick. I have a huge fear of medical issues that would require him to care for me intimately.
I wonder if there is anyone else like this in the whole world? Not the appearance, the shame to such an incredible extent.