Hi so im a FTM (no surgerys) and i have little to no real experience with women, I know im a top/dom, but I dont know exactly how or what to do as one.. any advice or tips and stuff? I dont know the right group or people to ask this too..
...also the no men thing...that counts for me too right?- I didnt undertand that part of the rules fully..
First one: https://www.reddit.com/r/unsentLoveLetters1st/s/Fc9duwhMPq
So a little update. I sent it to her. (With mild grammar and spelling changes)
And all she said was: "good job(?)"
Honestly tho, I expected her to get mad-
Not because we have a rule or boundary where we cant talk about that or past or stuff or having feelings for each other. (At least..I dont think we do- ove asked what our boundires are as both friends and more before but im told the same thing- we dont have any so that worries me because I think there should be some) but yea. I thought she'd get mad or uncomfortable maybe she is uncomfortable i plan fo ask/talk about that but I dont know if I should? I should just let it be? Just said amd ignored? I mean I dont even really know what i wanted to achieve by telling her that. I just didnt want to hold it in anymore ig? I wanted her to know.
Actually before this sowm stuff happened (not between us reall) but I think we may be growing father apart? Its only been two weeks tho. And we sometimes kinda just take smal breaks since we have our own stuff going on like she has school and stuff- I dunno.. but yeah. Her response was good job(?) And started talking about a school situation... which is fine!!
...should I try to have a serious conversation with her tho? Not even necessarily about me or how I feel or us just about..everything? Like how she feels wants thinks and if we should even still be friends? I dont know how to handle situations like this to be honest.
My life before I met you, I had nobody, no family friends or anyone close to me i could talk to, trust, or even care about like a normal person may. Life was shallow, boring, and I was in a horrible place. I was headed in a even worse place. But then I met you. The first day was confusing in itself. Everything was lighter and I had already started to want to take care of you. To be there. Its weird, meeting someone not knowing them but almost instantly wanting to be the one to protect them and be there. But that's how it was for me. Then we started dating. Tbh we should have got to know each other better first. Because I wasn't the best. And I regret that. But we didnt. So you couldn't see it all, you saw a bit, of the person I was. I was Protective in a way but but for the right reasons then. I wanted you all to myself because the light you brought into my life.. I didnt want to give up. I was manipulative at times too. Getting upset or mad at you and emotionally manipulating you. I dont want to even say why I'd do that. Because there will never be a excuse for it all. Even if I wasn't that bad you say, I wasn't that great either. And I wish I was who you deserved and needed back then. But I wasn't thinking about you. Not much at least. I was thinking about me. And how it felt to be around you. What you distracted me from. Our first break up showed me some that who I was, wasn't good. That I wanted to get better. For you. To try again. And I did. But then She came Into the picture. I made mistakes with that. With gow I felt. Because I wanted you to be happy. Because I didnt know what to do. But it happend. And at some point, you wanted her. Not me. Which was fine. You are never forced to be with one or the other. You can love who you want. But then.. it hurt. Bad. I hated it. And I hated you for it. But I couldn't blame you. It wasn't your fault and you didn't know any better. But we broke up again. Im sure there's at least three to four times we have. Bit after it all. We just stopped. Stopped trying to make it work. Moved on. Amd even if its been a year an four months now, im still working on myself everyday to not only get over you, but to be the best person I can to you. Because I relizsed something. Yea. You are the person who brought light and hope into my world. But your more then that too.. its hard to describe.. you're somebody who just talking to can make me feel like everything is going to be ok. Just hearing your voice pulls me back from whatever dark place I fall back into. But thats not why I love you. I love you because you've also been here for me. Youve stayed my friend amd worked things out with me for this long. And im so greatful to you. Im so glad ive seen how much you've grown. How much more mature you've gotten. You're a amazing person, a wonderful friend, and the person who loves you next.. i hope they see just how good you are and treats you exactly how you deserve.
There's more. I dont know how to say it but there's so much more. Without you I lose the light that guides me, the hope i feel, but also the pride I take in knowing you, the person who makes me want to wake up and try. I lose all reason to want a future, a life, I start to go back to those dark places, because when your not around anymore when im left to myself and the rest of this world again, im reminded again and again how dark it is.
But I cant tell you that you have to stay because of me. Because that's not true nor right. I want you to do wjat you want. What makes you happy or feel is best for you. Regardless of me and how I handle things. I am not your responsibility. The things I do are on me. Nobody else. So if you read this and think you have to do something for me dont think that. Because its not true..
Thank you for coming into my life. For putting up with me for so long. And for being the light I needed. I love you so much. And I will always be here for you.
Ill probably make a part two when im thinking mkre clearly..because this isnt even half of it.
Should I tell her..? I want to. But it wouldn't do any good. I know that. But I want to tell her.
Advice pls..!!
There's more to me and her and stuff I wanna post later. Pur dynamic friendship and past relationship
This is my really trash rough draft of my hazbin/helluva boss oc.... I have no idea what kinda clothes hed wear so if anyone wants to draw him you pick whatever you think hed look good in! Hes a imp/incubus (ftm) if you dont know wjat kinda clothes or dont feel like drawing any some black boxers is fine.. but if you can make sense of this thatd be great!
Also was this the wrong tag- I didnt know what it meant compleatly..!!
Also my art is better then this.. this is just a draft..
Im 18 FTM, fairly new to bdsm, and I want to try out a whole lot of stuff, some being, having my chest tied. I've heard that's on a bit of a extream side? But I dont know. I wanna be safe tho. Also tips/advice and any safty stuff including anything regarding bdsm would be helpful!
The most i know is, trust, communication, boundaries, safety words and such. But I wanna know more about that? And reading about it doesnt really help me? To many words made long. I guess it helps to have someone just tell me then read? Oh do people even find partners for it? How are all these things done
I read the rules and i dont think this goes aginst anything? If it does im sorry i dont fully undertand some an thats fully on me