u/SavingsRaspberry4854

Hey, so really confused nowadays

I have always gotten along better with people older than me, even with a 10 year age gap, because from a very young age I started interacting with people much older than myself. That’s why I usually need at least a 5 year age gap to truly enjoy someone’s company.

Now I’m 21, but I can’t really connect with people my age because, career-wise, I’m ahead of many of them while they’re just starting out. That’s one of the reasons I couldn’t make close friends during university.

Since I work from home, life feels empty sometimes, and naturally I started feeling like I wanted a partner. So I slowly started putting myself out there and met a really good guy on Reddit, but later he ghosted me, and honestly it has left me feeling very demotivated lately. I understand everyone has their own choices, but I really wanted it to work, and it didn’t.

While trying to move on, I’ve also been getting rishta profiles through my mom, but the vibe matched so well with him that now it feels hard to start talking to someone new from scratch.

Any tips regarding this?

I’ve kept myself extremely busy and manage multiple clients at the same time, but this recent ghosting really affected my ability to focus on work. Now I keep thinking about how to get over it.

I also thought about making new friends, but even that feels difficult because starting conversations from scratch feels exhausting now.

Basic Information

Age: 21
Height: 5’3”
Weight: 68
Location: Lahore
Accommodation: Family-owned house
Education: Currently in the final year of bachelor’s
Profession: Working remotely as a marketer with a UK-based company
Marital Status: Never married

Religion

Sunni Muslim. I’m trying to become more consistent with prayers and improve myself religiously, InshaAllah.

Hobbies & Interests

I enjoy shopping, grocery runs, trying new food places, eating out, and occasionally cooking or experimenting with dishes. I also enjoy meaningful conversations and spending time with people I genuinely connect with. I’m not overly social and workaholic.

Family Background

We are a family of six, Alhamdulillah. I’m the second among my siblings and come from an educated and respectful family background.

Looking For

I’m looking for someone respectful, emotionally intelligent, hygienic, easygoing, and serious about building a peaceful and stable relationship. Someone supportive who values communication, personal space, individuality, and mutual respect.

Basic Preferences

Age: 24–29
Height: Taller than me
Marital Status: Never married
Religion: Sunni Muslim
Education: At least a bachelor’s degree
Personality: Career-oriented, responsible, and serious about growth and the future

Preferred Location

Lahore only, not willing to move abroad.

Preferred Family Setup

I would prefer a separate living arrangement rather than a joint family system.

Deal Breakers

Smoking, drinking, poor hygiene, lack of seriousness about the future, emotionally unavailable behavior, disrespect, or a controlling/mama’s boy mindset.

Children

Open to it

Marriage Timeline

Preferably within 1–2 years after compatibility and mutual understanding are established.

Hey all, wanna discuss that I met a guy on Reddit. We talked for a week and had 2 calls. Everything felt fine, so we decided to meet. (For bit context, i was exploring a decent rishta, found him in that subreddit)

After meeting, he suddenly changed. He stopped texting properly. I had to text first and his replies were very dry.

I asked him clearly if he’s not interested. He didn’t answer directly. He just said “don’t think too much” and “give me time to think”

I told him I need clarity, but he ignored my last message.

So I understand he’s not interested.

But I feel really hurt. It’s only been 2 days and we only talked for a week, but I feel very low.

I don’t understand why I get attached so fast.

How do I stop this and heal?