u/Sharp_Advance461

Not for dating per se, but for meeting other singles in our age group. I was hoping it would be a place to network and build community, maybe a monthly meeting at the Fairweather?

I (41F) am traveling in Vietnam and I got a call that my best friend and partner (42M) of 4 years died in an accident. He was an intermittent drug user, used opiates for 20 years, quit 3 years ago, but still did meth every 4-6 months in binges. There was a car fire, but the police said he had no smoke in his lungs. They think he had a heart attack. I suspect he was using. He hasn’t been feeling well and I think the fact that I’m away made him think he could use. I think he had a heart attack while using in his car and dropped the torch, causing the fire. Our relationship was complicated. We had a great time together but we could never move forward because of his drug use. I have a very stable life and professional job, so it was hard to really have a real relationship. Nonetheless we spent every weekend together and 2-3 nights during the week for dinner. When he would use, he would disappear for a few days and I always feared the worst. When I found out he was gone, I had already imagined this scenario 100x. He was funny, spontaneous, handsome, supportive, warm and deeply troubled. I just wanted to tell someone, maybe looking for support. I feel strange reaching to my friends because of his addiction, it seems like there is a lot of blame and stigma. I’m still in Vietnam, and doing ok. It comes in waves. I get back home to the states in 5 days. Curious what has helped others in the same situation. Any advice or support is appreciated.