u/Shot-Ostrich7747

I’m 26 and my husband and I have been TTC for almost 3 years. We’ve been seeing fertility specialists for 2 years and have tried everything except IVF. My husband’s testing is normal, and my infertility remains unexplained.

We’re about to start IVF. I have insurance coverage for one round, but after that IVF would be out of pocket and unaffordable for us. Adoption isn’t a realistic option financially either, so this feels like our one opportunity.

My husband has been incredibly supportive, but this process has been devastating for both of us. Watching everyone around me have children-often accidentally- while we’re struggling so much has become increasingly difficult. My mental health has really taken a hit and I find myself crying a lot and feeling less hopeful as time goes on.

For those who have been through this, how did you cope? How did you prepare yourself for the possibility that IVF might not work while still moving forward? Any advice is appreciated. It’s been an absolute nightmare that I can’t wake up from.

I love to see industry professionals who have tattoos somehow correlating to their job. Let me see your vet-med inspired tattoos.

I love poetry, but I feel like I've read a pretty small slice of what's out there.

What's the most moving poetry collection you've ever read? Something well written and memorable (maybe even relatable) that really stuck with you after you finished it. It doesn't have to be easy, but I'd like something that's still readable and emotionally impactful rather than something that feels like homework/decoding ancient English.

Trying to decide between two vet med job offers and curious what others would choose long term.

Option 1:
Very small privately owned husband/wife DVM practice. 2 dvms (obviously) and ~ 5 staff total. Standard GP only - refers out emergencies, hospitalization, advanced imaging, etc. M–F only, one half day during the week, no weekends, and the hours (in theory) are respected and you leave in a timely fashion at the eod. Lower stress environment overall.

Downside is obviously being part of such a tiny team. If someone calls out, takes PTO, gets sick, etc., it dramatically affects everyone. I also worry about drama. No health insurance offered, though I’m covered through my husband so that part doesn’t matter much for me personally.

Option 2:
Larger corporate hospital with 6 doctors and 35+ staff. Much busier, longer shifts, rotating Saturdays, and overall more demanding. But the medicine is noticeably higher level and more progressive. You see/do more advanced cases and I think I’d feel prouder professionally being part of that team. I would arguably have a much higher pay cap long term. They offer ok health insurance. I feel more comfortable having their resources and connections for my own aging dog’s health (god forbid we have an emergency one of these days…), but both offer generous employee pet discounts.

I would learn more hands-on skills at the tiny hospital because I wouldn’t just be one cog in a huge + busy machine. They have the time to teach me. At the corporate hospital I’d prefer the actual everyday caseload itself, but there’s also more risk of burnout which has been an issue for me historically.

Both are equally short staffed (because vet med), same commute, same general area/pay range.

For those who’ve worked both small private and larger corporate hospitals - which ended up being better for you long term?

Suggest me a well-known book (ideally a children’s book, *though not necessarily*) that became profoundly meaningful to you in a completely different way as you revisited it throughout different stages of your life.

I’m especially interested in books that revealed deeper emotional, philosophical, or existential meaning the older you got and the more life you experienced.

I’ve been trying to conceive for 3 years and feel completely stuck. All I’m really trying to pursue is ovulation induction. Complicating things: Im young (in my 20s) and healthy, but had genetic testing done in the past and was told I’m a mosaic carrier for a rare disease. It was described as inconclusive but still “most likely relevant.” From everything I’ve learned (including meeting with multiple genetic specialists), there is a low risk of having a child affected and the disease is something that can be treated throughout the child’s lifetime via gene therapy. Definitely not ideal but at this point, it’s a risk I’m personally willing to take.

Since that result, fertility doctors have been extremely hesitant to treat me. Some will only move forward if I do IVF with invasive and expensive testing before implantation, and others won’t treat me at all. That’s been really hard to accept, especially when I see people move forward with IVF in situations involving other more serious genetic risks without the same level of pushback.

Honestly, I 100% regret doing the genetic testing. I feel like it’s being used to block me from even trying less invasive options. I understand doctors have ethical obligations, but it also feels like my autonomy is being taken away.

I’m now considering starting over with a new clinic.

I know this is where it gets extra complicated… I’m debating whether to disclose my prior genetic testing at a new clinic. I know it’s not ideal (and probably not ethical) to leave that out, but I’m worried that if I do disclose it, I’ll just get shut down again. On the other hand, I don’t know if clinics can access that information anyway through insurance benefits or prior records, and I don’t want it to backfire.

Has anyone been in a situation like this? Were you able to pursue ovulation induction with a known genetic risk? Do clinics typically require prior genetic records, or only what you provide? Is it a red flag to opt out of providing previous medical records?

*Please be kind. I’ve done a lot of research and this is a very personal decision. I’m just trying to figure out how to move forward and not lose more time.*

I’m dealing with constant solicitors knocking on my door despite having clear “no soliciting” signs posted and a “beware of dog” sign as well. They either ignore them or claim they didn’t see them, and it’s getting really frustrating. They’re relentless.

The bigger issue is that my dog is large + aggressive, especially with people approaching the house/door unexpectedly. I take responsibility for managing him, but I’m genuinely concerned about a situation where someone ignores the signs, knocks anyway, and something goes wrong. I don’t want anyone getting hurt, and I definitely don’t want to end up in a legal situation because someone chose to ignore posted warnings. Ringing the doorbell is a huge trigger for him.

Has anyone found a way that actually works to stop solicitors from knocking? Are there stronger signs, legal notices, or anything enforceable that makes a difference? Would something like a “Do Not Knock” registry (if that’s even real) help?

Open to practical solutions… I’ve never experienced this problem in any of my previous homes 🫠 my dog is going insane and frankly so am I.