u/Specialist_Fuel3210

Looking for ways I can clearly monitor the input of my voice when playing live with my band.

Almost every experience I’ve had with wedge monitors my vocals have been severely drowned out by all the other instruments, even when I ask them to turn up the volume of my vocals they are just “cloudy” and not clear enough to be able to hear my every note.

We’ve played primarily small stages where the drums are right behind me and the other guitar and bass amps are pretty close to me, only one instance where the stage was quite big and we were spread out could I actually hear myself after asking for my vocals to be turned up.

I don’t think we actually play THAT loud, so regardless, I’m looking for your ways/gear recommendations that I can use personally to monitor my vocals and not have to rely on the chance of hearing myself through the wedge. Thank you

22m, While I know the definition of Demisexual, I just wanted to hear some thoughts if I match the description or something similar. Emotional attraction and connection is what Im drawn to.

I found out from a friend that a girl I just met and found attractive, especially emotionally (big deal to me) said she would sleep with me. She seems to only be looking for something causal. it had me thinking that this would be a great opportunity to get to know myself a bit more as I always decline this and aim for meaningful relationships, but because of my lack of desire for sex (explained below) if I pushed myself to pursue for casual sex, I definitely think I’d embarrass myself as I don’t typically do this, or to rephrase, wouldn’t be able to do it.

All my teen years - now I’ve had low libido (my testosterone levels are normal). When I was in relationships with women that were genuinely attractive, I’ve never had the urge to have sex or have been the type to be goal oriented in having sex. I’ve always looked for long lasting connection, which has made me decline a few occasions I’ve had the opportunity to spend the night with a women, a typical guy would most likely accept the offer and they’d be driven by that sexual side, but mine never seems to turn on, even with the opportunity right in front of me.

I want connection, to give and be loved, have little secrets, all the intimacy of a relationship, and honestly the thought of that on paper makes me feel sexual attraction. Of course sex is to come in a relationship at some point, I believe it’s important and I do still fantasize about it, I just don’t exactly desire it.

Now this is where I’m a little confused, I unfortunately do have anxiety, so I also wonder where this plays its part in all of this -

Ive never initiated sex, ever. The women always has in my relationships, and it’s been really quickly into knowing them that it happens. Even months and months in the future with on-the-regular sex, I’ve still never initiated it. I’ve never had a reason to decline as it was always fun and I never regretted it, it’s just never been on my mind until I have the option to reciprocate in a relationship.

The anxiety part -

every single “first time” with each girl, ive been unable to get an erection. Through direct stimulation (and the embarrassment of asking for help), it works and I’ll be good for the session, but through the mental stimulation alone Im unable. I’m unsure if this is from anxiety, or lack of interest when going into it. After that first time, I’m usually able to get one for the future times, but I don’t know if it’s cause I’m past the initial performance anxiety or that I know this person on a more intimate level now and I’ve become slightly more comfortable, though I still don’t “desire” the sex.

I don’t know if this is full on demisexual or is more related to performance anxiety, but the lack of interest for sex has always made me feel like I don’t fit in, I’m not “normal”, and it keeps me away from these opportunities of hooking up with women that I feel like men my age should desire and instead I aim for a relationship.

This sound demisexual to you? I really appreciate anyone’s insight