u/StatisticianTrick669

When we got back to my house, I asked for my key back and he did. I showed him the receipt from Jul 2 and just said I’d respect him more if he stopped denying this. He kept saying we r over then?? Then stormed out. He said it’s his adhd why he brought his moms receipt to his house and all these coincidences keep happening that he’s sick of (same cooler he bought ended up in his bag on July 1 ). Just crazy . The denial is so severe

My Q of 4 years who was sober for 3 years and I only knew him sober, started drinking behind my back 15 months ago. I caught him. He claims to have stopped by continued to this past Feb. he promised to quit. Said he’d never lie to me ever again and is on adhd meds etc. guess what I just found this week- bottles and coolers and a receipt for booze Jul 2. I cannot believe this truly. I am at his house and discreetly grabbing my valuables. I just need my key now. I am shook . He has denied all week of drinking and I even said yesterday if you do at all anymore I will hate you. Absolutely crazy the denial . Help

Hello, about a year ago I noticed my partner was secretly indulging in alcohol binges as I found his stash (3 years in). He was a non drinker to my knowledge. I was very shocked and he said he slipped but it was over and I will never have to worry about it again. I took him at his word at that time. We do not live together.
Just this past February, I caught more stashes and evidence of pretty open use in his home and in his bag. He was not reliable leading up to this.
He started medication for his adhd , went to therapy and we have tried some couples therapy. He was also asked to clean any old stuff out.
Well we are only at his place 2 nights a month as it’s out of town and not convenient. Nothing really got cleaned out.
Last week he cleaned it out on Thursday and said he threw it in the towns recycling. Ok great. He is going through a lot of stress at work, parenting and helping sell his mom’s house and clearing it as her health is failing.He is not being reliable again . We had a massive fight yesterday about how angry and unreliable he was getting, he went to bed and I checked his bag and there were 2 vodka coolers in there.(empties )
It was like midnight.. he said it was a couple stragglers from the clean out the previous week and he just tossed the last remaining in his bag (they were on top). He has executive functioning issues so it is maybe a possibility. He said he worked so hard to clear everything out , and is doing what I asked . He swore to me he wasn’t drinking and was just stupid and forgot to toss them.
Am I being played yet again!!? He knows I am leaving if he’s drinking. This is absolutely awful and why I wanted this stuff cleaned out a long time ago!

I have been pushed to the absolute brink by my n parents. They co own my house and I told them after 9 months of NC, last week, that I was open to discussing the house as the mortgage term is coming due this fall. The lawyer I consulted told me I had to talk to them.
So I did and told them my broker was looking at options so I can refinance even on disability and also pay them back the 20% to my 80% thay was put down up front.
They said they would be agreeable to whatever works. The last thing I said is I wanted ti keep things strictly about the house. (Aka not about my son!) and now my dad is calling again - he tried to also on my bday recently) about getting my son A FEW NIGHTS?! And left it in a v/m.
They haven’t seen him in about a year and want a few nights after explicitly being told I don’t want to discuss anything but the house ?!?!?
What? Fucking gives ?!?
Every major or minor holiday they are bothering me and ruining it for me. This house deal is ruined.
My ear is infected today and my SO of 4 years just broke up with me! I can’t take it any fucking more . Do I just give them my child so they will shut the fuck up?!!! I literally am close to just leaving this godamn earth

I have been with my partner for 4 years in a dating capacity as we wanted to take our time blending our lives and kids together. That being said I’m close with my MIL (or was), she was kind to me when my own family ostracized me.
About 2 years in her husband (FIL) was admitted to a care home for dimentia. She went from being capable, emotionally healthy - to a massive cognitive decline. Very depressed, weoponize incompetence, telling my partner he can’t move forward with his life with me bc she needs him more.
Me and my SO started couples counselling to deal with both our boomer parents crushing guilt, obligation and fear they’ve caused us to hold back our lives . This weekend we cooked supper for Father’s Day for everyone at his moms - he often has his custody time there as it has a self contained suite in the basement close to their activities. She declined supper when I asked her but came out an hour later screaming at us bc no one offered her supper. I never seen this before and was gobsmacked.
.anyone else deal with a MIl who went off the deep end when their husband went into a care home ? What did you do?

I have been in NC for over a year now from my parents. Their behavior escalated beyond belief following getting my property for which I paid the large majority, live jn with my child, and pay all the bills for. They helped 20% and are on my mortgage/ title.
I have to email them (I avoided texts and emails the last 6 or so months ), because the mortgage term is coming due later this year. I’m making arrangements with a separate broker to see if I can refinance on my own and also pay them back.
I don’t think they will like this bc : they will lose control, and they get enraged over me spending my own money (refinancing isn’t cheap).
I’m on disabled income so this is gonna be tough.
I could use support as I’m forced to walk through the fire yet again. This is absolute hell. Any prayers, encouragement , advise, or well wishes are appreciated. They are very mad I have also cut off my son from seeing them a year ago as well (they are used to expecting to go around me to get him in the past). They may behave retaliatory or expect access to my son for exchange of the house deal going through ok.

My 40th bday is tomorrow, first year NC.
I thought this could happen tomorrow but nope, my Emom emails tonight. I couldn’t read it. She never tried email she tried text, whatssap and fb msg this past year. I shook and binge ate after. Ruined my mental health.
I can’t permanently go NC bc they co own my house. Hopefully not much longer if I can refinance.
Is it normal to second guess your decision to go NC? Ie ( was it really that bad? Was I over reacting ? Did I have to cut my child off from them too?
It’s all flooding over me. My dad texted me for Mother’s Day and I didn’t respond.
These 2 make me physically and mentally ill and I’m spiralling eating cheesies and cookies and icecream. 🙈🤢

I have been NC with my parents about 6 months but LC since they put a share into my home and co own my home 18 months ago. My Ndad became hostile and aggressive and uber controlling and my emom did the minimizing commentary and I realized I had enough. I haven’t even let them see my son for 9 months.
For Mother’s Day my dad is saying HMD and love and miss you. My mom is making commentary on social media.
The double bind is- I own the property with them and want to buy them out later this year.
If I respond I let them in again but if I don’t respond the legal process can be harder the angrier they get at my silence. I’m damned if I do or don’t. They just want my son.
Also if I don’t respond they can let all the extended family know how awful I am bc afterall they just said nice things to me. Convenient. Next is my bday soon and the same shit will happen again. I haven’t responded to 5 separate texts from my dad this year. Just a vent .
Also my SO told me to discuss things with my emom who is “nice”. I said I’ve been trying that for 40 years and I hate her now bc she never once protected me or helped me in any way regarding dad’s control and aggression.