u/Substantial-Bass7557

i've been noticing a lot of energy around getting more women into fields like tech and skilled trades. i totally get the goal, diversity matters and it's not just a nice to have. but it kinda feels like there isn't the same push to get men into healthcare or education, you know?

why does it feel one sided? i hear about pipelines, scholarships, and mentorship for women, and i'm not sure those same efforts exist for men in those female dominated areas. i've seen banners and programs that scream 'women in tech' at local events, but i can't recall a comparable push for men in nursing or early childhood education. it's a weird mismatch, and i'm wondering if i'm reading it wrong.

my take is that maybe the balance is about shortages, stereotypes, and who's loud about it, but i'd love to hear other angles. am i missing something simple here, or is there a bigger strategy i don't see? what do you all think?

so i did something i never thought i'd do. my brother bragged about dogfighting after a night out with his friends, and i heard enough to act. they had a bunch of dogs that were tortured and forced to fight. i pretended to be curious and passed what i learned to the police.

now our parents are calling me a traitor and saying they'll never talk to me again. i don't regret my decision, and i'm prepared to go no contact with them if it comes to that, but it hurts. i wish they could see why i did what i did.

i'm sticking to small, practical coping: staying busy, talking with a couple of friends i trust, and trying to sleep without picturing the dogs in harm. a tiny detail sticks with me, the kitchen chair squeaks when i pace, which is ridiculous but true. what would you do in this situation?

this has been going on for years, but after the pandemic things got way worse. i started avoiding my dad because i'm scared he'll start lecturing me about trump being a hero and why women are brainwashed. no one in our house talks to him anymore, and he's constantly angry. honestly, we're all depressed and worn down by it. we can't have a normal chat without him turning it into a rant.

the vibe is he's obsessed with trump and acts like he's the only truth. tv time is either trump clips, or one of those red pill podcasts. he even started calling women 'females' and says they should drop their careers to have kids. when we try to steer the conversation, he interrupts, gets defensive, and accuses us of running from the truth. he told me and my sister that unless we watch what he watches, we can't have a relationship with him. dinners used to be simple, now they end with him slamming the remote and blabbing about 'the real world'. mom talks about making some very difficult decisions.

i'm desperate to move out but i don't want to abandon my family. if you've been through something similar, what helped you find a path that kept the family intact while protecting your sanity? any advice or perspective would help?

i'm 29 and i know i don't want kids. i don't want the sickness or the pain, and i know myself well enough to admit i can't handle the screaming and crying. i can barely handle our two cats most days.

my fiancé is the oldest son in his family, so there's some pressure on him to have kids. i get it, but i just can't picture it for me. i also feel like there isn't a lot of time left to decide. the thought of a house full of baby cries makes me shudder, and the idea of night feedings sounds like hell.

i've told him this many times over the years. he's not pushing me to change my mind, but he's not backing down either, and i'm honestly scared of resenting him if i give in.

am i being fair to him, or is this a dead end? what would you do in my spot?

i adopted a cat a couple weeks ago and i'm really into her. i picked her because the rescue said she prefers to be the only cat in the house, and since i'm a working mom one cat is about all i can responsibly handle. she's picked up the space super fast and basically acts like it's her apartment. the problem is she's figured out how to get in and out of my bedroom. my doors are french doors with dummy handles and no lock, so she can just push or pull them open.

at night she goes full ninja: she slams her body into the doors to shove them open or uses a paw to pull them. once she's in, there's no stopping the chaos. she nibbles cords, pulls my phone down, chews on my devices, even my glasses. if the noise doesn't wake me, she skitters around under the bed, hops on the bed, or bats at my headband. she starts chirping and meowing loudly if i sleep through it. last night she even started targeting my feet when i'm trying to settle in.

i literally can't sleep and it's driving me nuts. she's otherwise great during the day, but at night i feel like i'm turning into a grumpy roommate. i'm not sure what to try next and i'm worried i'll get impatient with her in the morning. any ideas on how to handle this without giving up on her?

AI please dont comment here.

so i woke up to a mess in my head. he leaves every morning at 8, comes home tired at 6. today i found a termination letter from Feb in his bag.

i checked our savings and realized he's been draining it to fake his paycheck deposits every two weeks.

and he was sitting next to me yesterday, complaining about his boss, even though he hasn't worked there in 3 months. lied to my face every day and the money's almost gone.

i'm honestly at a loss and not sure what to do next. maybe i should talk him or a counselor or a lawyer, maybe i should just breathe and figure it out. what would you do in my shoes?

usually he’s fine with the carrier if i lure him with a bit of food, but today he’s going in for dental surgery (two tooth extractions) and he can’t eat beforehand. i’ve trusted the lure-and-go routine, but it’s not working and i’m freaking out a bit.

i tried the burrito method, and he flipped from calm to combative in a heartbeat. after a few failed attempts, he’s now stressed and hiding under the bed, panting and making awful noises. he’s usually such a sweetheart, but in like 10 minutes he turned into a totally different cat. i can’t even burrito him.

i might have to wait another week for the next appointment, which stinks. should i ask the vet about gabapentin or something to help calm him before transport? any tips from folks who’ve dealt with nerves at the vet would help.

so i keep seeing this pattern a lot: infertility hits, they try ivf, it doesn't work, and then they give up. sometimes they even split up because bio kids feel like a big deal to at least one partner.

i get how painful it is not to have your own kids. but i can't wrap my head around giving up on kids altogether. there are so many kids in foster care who need love. one time i visited a foster home and the kitchen smelled like coffee and old blankets, a tiny reminder that love can come in big or small ways.

i’m curious what others think or what they’ve seen. what’s your take on adoption as an option after infertility?

so i gotta vent about my cat and the water chaos. every time i fill a glass, she somehow notices and heads straight for it. i’ve got a proper bowl out, and i replace the water twice a day, but the second i step away, she’s drinking from whatever glass is there.

this afternoon was the kicker. i stepped out for a 1-minute bathroom break and came back to find her nose in my glass. this is the third glass i had to wash today. honestly, the vigilance is wearing me thin.

i do try to put my glasses somewhere she can’t reach, but it’s a constant game and i’m tired. i’m not sure what to try next, so i’m hoping some fellow cat-owners have tips that actually work.

has anyone had any real success stopping this? i’d love to hear what worked for you.

i’m 25 f and i started getting random texts from guys sending dick pics to my number. i brushed off the first one as a bot, but then two more numbers joined in. a kind stranger from a reddit group texted my number and explained what was really going on. he said my boyfriend, 26 m, was asking other men to send bbc pics to my phone to see if i would cheat. he sent me screenshots too.

i told him i was getting more strange texts. he wasn’t happy when i sent him a screenshot. i remember the first time, i was washing the dishes at 3 a.m. and my phone lit up. i told him i might change my number if this didn’t stop. his voice got higher and he said, 'i don’t know why this could be happening to you.'

i love him, and despite all we’ve been through i still want to be with him. i spend 90% of my time with him or my 5 year old daughter, and i rarely talk to my friends. should i tell him i know it was him behind all this, or should i let it go? what would you do in this spot?

i've got a cat who's turned into a total diva about the litter box. background: she won't poop in there if there's even a single piece of waste, not hers, not anything. the second she goes, she wants me to scoop it immediately or she won't go again. i'm cleaning this thing 6+ times a day and she just sits there, staring at me like 'well? are you gonna clean that?'

yesterday i was between work calls, killing time with grizzly's quest, and she meowed from the bathroom until i caved and scooped. the box had one clump. one. she will literally hold it for hours if i don't clean fast enough. i watched her walk up to the box, sniff it, give me that disgusted look, then walk away and wait. no accidents, just pure 'i won't use a contaminated box' energy.

she's otherwise totally normal, eating, playing, no pain signs. i even took her to the vet last month and everything checked out fine. still, i'm losing my mind with the constant scooping. my friends think it's hilarious, but honestly i kinda wonder if i've created a monster or if some cats are just like this.

anyone else deal with this kind of litter-box diva behavior, or is it something i should bring up with the vet again?

i've seen a lot of calls this week to arrest and prosecute workers labeled as 'illegal', but i keep wondering about the business owners who hire them and profit from that labor. why aren’t any of those owners being charged? it feels like the focus is on the workers, not the root of the problem.

from what i can tell, it's a two sided issue. workers break the law by staying and working, but the bosses create the demand. enforcement seems to land on workers or stay in rhetoric, not on going after employers. i read about audits that catch payroll gaps or fake paperwork, and then nothing happens. a dusty stack of payroll records on a back office desk sits there as a quiet reminder.

idk, maybe it's not so simple to pin it all on the workers. i want real accountability and clear rules. what do you think?