u/Successful_Animal188

i’m feeling so sad.

i’ve been making so much progress with dilating and got to dilator 6! then i started accutane (isotretinoin) last month.

it has completely dried me out (vulva & vagina), and i’m on the lowest dose.

i’ve been using menopausal products now like intimate oils/gels/lubes. i’m only in my mid twenties.

i also started online physiotherapy last week, bc i really want to get to PIV. she said since im on dilator 6, i should start to get my partner involved with dilating sessions now, so i can make the PIV transition easier.

today, i just finished my period. i tried to use the small side of my new vibrating pelvic wand, after 3 weeks of not dilating.

no lube is enough. it’s just so dry. number 3 & up wont even go in. i feel like i’ve lost all my progress.

i feel like giving up on this whole thing. i’m at my wits end.

i’m on dilator size 6 and it’s not comfortable for me yet. there is some discomfort. my vagina muscles feel super stretched.

i have number 7 and 8 too. today after my dilating session, i compared 6 with 7 and wtf!!!! the jump is HUGE!!!!?? how on earth is that going to get in me😭 surely there needs to be an in between size…..???

so far i’ve found the size differences okay, but i’m really not sure how i’m going to navigate this!

anyone have any tips?! x

i’m just over 2 weeks into taking accutane, 10mg, going well, had some whiteheads come out. dry lips, drier arms/legs.

i finished my period this weekend and had some INSANE itching/burning down there. unbearable even! i thought surely this is thrush/BV?

the sexual health clinic was closed over the weekend and Mon/Tues, so i went today to get tested.

turns out, it’s the accutane drying me UPPPP😭 even getting the swabs in was lowkey weird bc it’s SO DRY!!!! i’m only 25😭🙏🏽 what da heckkkkkk.

the itching and burning has stopped 95% now anyway. but the doctor told me to lube UP! any other girlies had this?!

edit: idk why people r downvoting some comments, weird asf stop being miserable & ug1y

hello.

just wondering about everyone else’s dilating sessions. when i dilate, i start from #1, just in case it doesn’t go in (i get worried about this often). i use the IR set.

it takes so much time doing it this way! i’m on #6 now and it takes like over an hour just to get to #6, then i try to keep it in for a bit longer too.

recently i took a break for almost 2 weeks, due to a long period & pms and tightness before my period. i’m now dilating again but only got to #4 yesterday before i got tired.

does everyone start from #1 each time you dilate or do you start from the last one you used?

also, does anyone else struggle with the IR dilators & angling? it is really really uncomfortable the first couple of inches, and then after that it does slide in. the first couple of inches of discomfort really put me off though!

TIA! x

i’m 25F, my hair loss is getting worse day by day. i’ve just started accutane too, so it’s probably going to be even worse 💔. the front of my hairline is visibly thinning, i don’t go outside unless i’ve got dark dry shampoo/hair fibres in or a headband.

only my family, husband, and 2 friends know i have AGA. one of my friends (who has known since 2020 bc i confided in her back then that i was losing hair) CONSTANTLY states at my scalp (front hairline area) whenever we see each other or are on facetime. it’s really jarring. i don’t want to tell her to stop doing that bc i don’t want to seem rude. but it really does annoy me so much.

i don’t want to tell anybody else, not even my cousins or my in-laws. i just don’t want the pity, or people staring at my hair/scalp all the time.

tell my about your experiences, do you tell people about your hair loss?

hello!

my husband and i are looking to go to Greece but we have no idea where to pick!

we’re British but we do NOT want to be surrounded by drunk Brits at all. we want a relaxing beach holiday to just chill and enjoy the sea. we’d only be going for 4 nights. we both drive so getting around wouldn’t be an issue. we aren’t into nightlife either.

does anyone have any reccs for a (probably boring) couple in their mid twenties??🙂 and also what sites do people use to book hotels/accommodation?

thanks in advance :) x

salams girlies.

i’m 25 and recently been diagnosed with AGA (androgenic alopecia). my dad has male pattern baldness and my mum has trauma related hair loss.

i’m the only woman in my family (extended included) to have this! i kinda feel alone, bc i come from a culture where thick Asian hair is everything! but it is what it is, i can’t change my genetics so im alright. hate the pity i receive from other women irl though, so ive only told my family & 2 close friends.

my part has widened and thinned a lot now, to the point where im using fibres to cover it & im not a hijabi, but sometimes i wear a square scarf over my head, but then i feel like im cosplaying as a hijabi and feel bad🥲.

anyone else deal with alopecia?! i might be the only mid twenties gal with this, it feels like!😭

i’m starting accutane soon and have seen lots of people online saying they take an antihistamine daily alongside their meds to prevent skin purging.

i asked my dermatologist if i should be doing this today at my appointment and she said no because those tablets have completely different pathways so it doesn’t make sense to do that. 🥲

i’ve seen people online who do this and they have no purging so idk if it’s worth trying or not! 😭 has anyone here done so, and do you feel like the skin purging was less when you took an antihistamine daily??

thanks.

I’ve managed to get to dilator 4 out of my 5 piece set. But when I breathe it literally pushes the dilator out, and I feel a lot of resistance with this one. It wasn’t painful, just uncomfortable I’d say. I’m struggling to keep it in for longer than 5 minutes.

Yesterday I thought let me try PIV anyway, just to see if it would work at all. My partner was able to get in about 1.5inches but I was really struggling to keep my legs down and relax. I feel like I should’ve just been able to completely relax and take him, but I was leg locking & trying real hard to do diaphragmatic breathing. My vagina felt really stretched so we didn’t continue.

Does anyone have any tips on how to relax? I had my studio ghibli relaxing music playing. I was chilled out. Did stretches beforehand, and was relaxed when inserting dilators 1-4. Or maybe it was due to the fact I wasn’t aroused or turned on - I like to dilate with my partner in the room but in a non sexual setting, so that I have no pressure on myself etc. So maybe it was due to not being aroused??

I’m just thinking now, when we do next have intimacy time (probably tonight), how do I relax when it’s time to attempt PIV?! Or maybe I’m rushing and should be comfortable with dilator 4 & 5 first, before trying PIV?? 😔😭 please help x

hi all. i’m British Pakistani (yes, i know most British Paks are weird. personally i try to stay away from those folk too!) and im struggling to understand my family back home.

i don’t speak with them bc growing up they were extremely abusive every time we visited, they’ve lit done black magic on us, and tried forcing all of my siblings and i to marry our first cousins (which thankfully we managed to get away from).

my dad was sent to the UK when he was 4 years old, to live with his Mamu. he was always told by his family that the reason he was sent is so he can provide for everyone back home. my dad has SEVEN siblings, and they all have at least 4 kids each. his siblings all married their first cousins, and most of their kids married their first cousins too. it makes me sick, but that’s a different topic.

my male cousins are between mid twenties to forties. they are all lazy and try to get out of working, and would rather have their sisters working. my uncle in particular, has 5 children (the eldest son is married, lives separately, and has a baby) and since the beginning, has always lived off my dad’s income.

my dad has a couple of businesses but he’s never been able to actually spend on his own kids because my obese uncle and his obese family apparently can’t afford groceries.

now that my cousin has moved out with his son and wife, he’s also demanding that my dad pay his rent, bills, groceries, and gas for his car etc. he’s a grown ass man, maybe like 29 now. my dad is a narcissist but also has a lot of guilt abt him being the only one in the UK, so he just does everything they ask for. we’ve never had a single Qurbani Eid where we actually have Qurbani meat ourselves, bc my dad prefers that his family gets goats etc in Pakistan. that’s just one of the things we were denied.

i’m married now to a revert Alhamdulillah so i’m able to fully remove myself from my family back home, but it just irritates me so much that my dad is STILL stressing about them constantly and giving away all of his money. it has also created arguments and abuse constantly between my parents, as my mum hates what he does.

it also upsets me that i’ll never be able to introduce a family to my husband if we eventually ever do visit Pakistan (it’s a beautiful country and we both really want to visit together iA).

so i’d like to know, is this the NORM in Pakistani families where an Uncle is living abroad??

I have a pack of pink silicone dilators. I like them because they have a handle so it makes it easier, and they’re slightly curved. They were very cheap, probably less than £20.

Is it worth investing in some of the £50+ sets? They’re all straight, not curved. I’m wondering does the dilator matter so much? Mine were cheap compared to the other ones I have seen, so I’m worried maybe I won’t make as much progress due to this?

Thanks in advance :).