r/pakistan

Assalam-walaikum everyone! I'm a British Muslim of Pakistani ethnicity, I was born and brought up in England. I recently married a 40 year old man, born and raised in Mirpur, Azad Kashmir. He says that men from that area and Pakistan in general do not know what romance is and it is not the norm to take your wife out on dates, buy her flowers and small gifts to show that he is thinking of her, even hand-holding or hugging during the day, in private is not the done thing?

I feel like he's just making excuses to not show affection and emotional intelligence but is it true that Pakistani and Kashmiri men do not know of these things and are not expected to do them?

Thank you for your help! Also, please no DMs, I'm merely asking for people's views on this topic.

EDIT: I just want to add that as a Muslim, I don't expect PDA, I just meant hand holding and hugging during the day but in private, I.e. in your own home.

Parents are trynna get me married by next year when I’ll be 22, I just disagree with that decision. What do you guys think is the perfect age to get married?

Mansoor Ali Khan once asked Muzammil (publically available edition of Hum Dekhein Gey) that people criticize us journalists for always criticizing but never providing solutions. Muzammil said thats not my job as a journalist, thats for politicians to do. But that is where the paradox begins, you can only be wrong if you provide a solution. Criticism is hardly even wrong in a country like Pakistan.

Imran khan thought the solution against corrupt politcians was the establishment, he was clearly wrong because the establishment is more corrupt and authoritarian but he identified a problem and tried to fix it but failed has to live with that now.

The infallible trick is to never provide a solution and hence never be wrong. Whenever you provide a solution there will be arguments against or for it. But if you just say "children being out of school is bad" then there's no way to be wrong. You dont actually need to contribute to the discussion of how we get more children enrolled in schools. That's for the politicians to do whom you simultaneously want crucified.

I believe this is the actual problem with Pakistan, we're all arm chair experts and god forbid we read Nietzsche or Orwell then we're literally Aristotle but only in terms of criticism. Literally no one has a solution.

I'm doctor by profession. recently graduated. and my father passed away some time ago. I was thinking of going for CSS. do you think it is still worth it in 2026? There is literally such a bad future for doctors here that I am left with no choice other than this. Can anyone tell life style of css officer if you have any in your family. I dont wanna do rishwat stuff and any haram kamai. everything on merit. But I have heard that they will throw me is some distanced area. I'm from Lahore and live alone with my mother

I am a 24-year-old female, and I would like to know what an ideal emergency fund should look like. Should it cover 3 months, 6 months, or 12 months of expenses? What would you personally recommend, and how much should I save before I start investing?

Additionally, where should I keep my emergency fund in Pakistan?

I’m curious about this and wanted perspectives from both men and women, especially people who are married, engaged, or seriously considering marriage.

Did you discuss the number of kids you wanted before marriage or during the talking stage? Is that considered a normal/reasonable thing to bring up with a potential partner?

Also, do most men generally prefer big families if finances aren’t an issue, or are smaller families becoming more common now?

As a woman, if she strongly prefers only 1–2 kids, is that usually seen as a red flag or taken negatively during marriage talks? As if she isnt family oriented?

Just wondering how people in Pakistan usually approach this topic and what kind of reactions are generally expected. And what is general preference for men and women, when it comes to number of kids and gap between kids. As in are people generally mindful of healthy gap between kids and understand and prioritize woman health?

Sorry if these are very basic questions - Overseas Pakistani and have never bought property in Pakistan before.

I’m considering buying an apartment in Askari 11 Lahore in roughly the 3–3.5 crore PKR range and trying to understand both the money transfer side and the actual buying process.

For transferring funds from overseas, is the normal approach just to use Roshan Digital Account? Are there practical limits when transferring larger amounts like this? Is it cleaner to transfer from one account only, or do people sometimes split transfers between husband/wife accounts or does that just create unnecessary complexity?

Then on the actual purchase side — when buying in Askari 11, who are you usually buying from? Is there some central Askari / management office involved in the transfer process or are you simply buying directly from an individual owner?

How does the transaction normally work? Do you pay a small bayana/deposit first and then pay the balance at transfer? Is there typically a lawyer/conveyancer involved or is it mostly buyer + seller + dealer?

Having never bought before - my biggest concern is avoiding any fraud. What’s considered normal and safe in Lahore for apartment purchases? Is there some official transfer/verification process that people rely on?

Would appreciate hearing from anyone who has actually bought in Askari (especially Askari 11) recently.