u/Successful_Pop9630

[removed]

I am a father of a three year old son and my wife and I accidentally conceive another. Though the pregnancy of the first one was smooth, the post delivery phase has been harsh on me. I literally bottle fed the baby for 8 months straight every single night, changed it's diapers and went to work in the morning to help my wife recover. I lost 8 kgs in 8 months and a lot of hair, lost focus on my career for a good one year.

Ever since until then my wife really hasn't stepped to taking care of him, doing school drops etc. We live in Asia so we have a nanny who cooks while I handle a more stressed job than before, manage household stuff grocery runs, school runs and I'm burned up before it's even Monday.

My wife wants to keep this second one and I've been honest about the support I've got in raising this one and I cannot commit to doing the same for the next one with a job and the first one at stake.

Let me know your thoughts on whether I'm overthinking this.