u/Sufficient-Reveal132

mine is a 14 inch screen, easier for me to see and easier to hit the right button. what about you? and do you use more symbol based or text based? i mainly use symbol

i like my aac but god i want the speed and efficiency of verbal speech. aac is so slow in comparison and its esp frustrating when i can tell the person im talking to doesn't want to wait. i end up forcing myself to speak with my mouth even when it takes a lot of energy or the words aren't coming out right and im not saying what i mean. aac is so much easier to use than my mouth but ugh i really crave the speed of (reliable) verbal speech

found out i'm the person excluded from "real" group chat and just. feel so isolated and alone. ig i get it, didn't talk much anyway and know they aren't actually my friends, they're ex partners friends and only talked to me bc i followed partner to hang out. but just hate hate that don't have any friends or connections. don't understand why i'm so unable to connect to people. always like there's a big gap between me and everyone else. only person i had connection with was partner but broke up with me bc i'm too disabled and now they talk to me less that they do anyone else. and i know this is thing a lot of autism struggle with but still feel so alone with it

have until august 23 to find place to stay. don't have anywhere to go, don't know what to do. trying to apply for independent living but don't think will happen in time. don't have any survival skills, barely able to take care of myself. i'm so scared. don't know how to survive this

get so bad that arms and legs go numb and i risk fainting from hyperventilating. don't have friends or family for support. most recent one only stopped bc i took more than double of my anxiety meds. also tend to self injure with hitting and digging nails in. coping strategies? esp ones for when you can't think well

were together for 9 years, since middle school. broke up tonight. supposed to stay friends but idk if we will. don't have anyone other friends or people i really talk too, only 3 acquaintances i don't know how to talk to. they're the only one i talk to. and the only one ive ever been able to have any sort of connection with. feel like i'm never going to make another friend or have another relationship. feels like its my fault for ruining our relationship bc i'm too disabled and too autistic and too mentally ill. just going to be alone forever bc i don't know how to be a person.

i feel so shitty and guilty for this but i'm just so sick and tired of listening to them talk about how they don't know if they can live off $2000 per month and they're so stressed and scared. while i only get $100 per month and 80% of it goes to medical copay, sometimes more. right now i have less than $8 to last me until the 1st. i just hate listening to them vent about money when the only time i eat is when they have deals or points or rewards for free food at fast food places. i'm extremely lucky that i currently have a place to live for free, but the situation is super precarious and i'm at high risk of being kicked out with nowhere else to go. and i feel so bad for feeling this way because i know it's not a competition, anyone who is struggling is allowed to complain about it, drowning in 2 feet of water is the same as drowning in 20 feet of water. but god it makes me feel so bitter

edit: i don't mean for this to be a big deal and i'm not looking for advice, just wanted to get it off my chest while i figure out how to talk about it with them. we've been really close since middle school and i love them to death, i'm just frustrated because things are so rough right now. we're both using two extra rooms in their family's house for free, but as i said the situation is precarious, for reasons i'm not comfortable talking about. i'm multiply disabled and unable to work at all, in the process of applying for benefits and assistance but unfortunately those things take time.

i can't imagine not stimming. i stim constantly all the time. i can stop for maybe a few minutes if focus really really hard on it. but its so so uncomfortable and can't focus on anything else. can you (general you) stop stimming?

partner and i want to try grilling hot dogs and burgers, which we've never done before. we don't want to buy a grill so we figured trying a public grill at a local lake would be a good idea

how do we use a grill? specifically for hot dogs and burgers? how do we get permission to use the grill at the lake?

detailed steps please, we don't know what we're doing at all ;-;

i have barely been eating bc don't have money for safe foods. i only have $10 until july 1 and i'm trying really hard to save it for emergency. there's food in the house but it's either not mine to eat or i just can't get myself to eat it. it's so so frustrating and i hate that i can't make my brain let me eat something even though i really need to

partner can't handle me anymore. inability to take care of myself is threatening our housing and their ability to work. how to apply for assissted living or equivalent or similar. arkansas united states. mental and physical disabilities. waiting to hear back from disability office. if not right place to ask please directly me to a better place

seen people do both. does it matter? what do you prefer? trying to decide

neurofeedback was suggested for me and i was told that it is more effective for people with autism then some other treatments. and it's been one of the most helpful things for me. i'm not doing it currently bc i lost access to my provider and am trying to find a new one, but it was actually really really helpful for me, and the person i saw was so so understanding and also autistic themself

it helped with things i didn't know were possible to help for me, and being able to see my brainwaves respond an have the tangible, visible evidence of improvement was so so encouraging

- improved my sleep. have had weird sleep problems my whole life. but now i get sleepy at night before taking my sleep med, and sometimes can even fall asleep without it! still need it but this is still a big thing for me

- helped me have a little higher threshold for sensory things. i can handle a bit more stimulation than before, stores are a little easier

- better emotional(?) awareness. easier for me to identify when i'm starting to feel bad and need to calm down, when i'm starting to get overwhelmed / overstimulated

does anyone else have experience with neurofeedback? also i can try to explain what it is if you ask!

sorry bad words can't do good words at now. partner not understand shutdowns and just make worse. be mean to me demand me listen stop me stimming pull on me demand look at them and talk to them. partner not understand i'm not do on purpose. not ignore them not choose this and not able control self. can't move can't talk can't respond. told them before and sent stuff to read but they h still do bad an mean. make me scared feel alone not trust them. no one to help me. wish partner listen bette r

partner and i really really need to move to our own apartment as soon as possible. their income isn't enough for us. they and our therapists want me to get a job. but i don't even know if i can get a job. i can't do hygiene by myself. i can't do phone calls. i can't go anywhere by myself. i can't get ready to go somewhere without a lot of buffering and reminders. i can't remember to take my meds. i struggle to make food for myself. i have a lot of sensory problems and get overstimulated really easily. i have frequent verbal shutdowns and can't speak to strangers 95% of the time. i have literally no social skills (2nd percentile in my assessment). and that's not even including any physical disability stuff.

is it even possible for me to get and keep a job? i don't see how i'll ever be able to do that, especially not in the time frame we need. and my partner says they're scared i'll never be able to get a job and be independent and take care of myself. i don't want that to be true but i just don't know how i'm going to have a job when i literally can't even take care of myself. and if i don't get a job we can't move out and we desperately need to. i don't know what to do.