u/Super_Bright

Hi everyone.

I'm originally from the north east but moved away with family years ago. I'm now in the process of moving to Sunderland later this year but I'm doing my best to make sure I don't end up lonely. I can be a bit introverted and I don't drink so I can sometimes find it hard to settle in a new place so I want to have a plan ahead of time.

I really like outdoorsy and creative hobbies. I love walking next to the sea or in nature or trying a new craft project. I like video games and sport as well (also a Sunderland fan).

What would you recommend a late 20s guy like me do when moving to the area to meet new people locally? Thanks in advance!

Get glad all over fucking blasting lads 😎

I've been pretty socially reclusive for a while, basically since COVID. Mental health tanked and just didn't feel too good about myself, all that fun stuff (⁠~⁠‾⁠▿⁠‾⁠)⁠~. But I'm moving out of my parents house soon and finally making a go at this whole life thing. I wanna meet people, have friends and not feel like an island anymore but I don't really know how to do that anymore. I ask for advice and everyone says "join a club, get a hobby, volunteer" which I'm sure is good advice... But then what? I know this sounds stupidly simple but I really have been struggling with fear that even if I try to reach out to the world again, maybe the ship of having snow people in my life has sailed. I wanna prove that thought wrong though, so if you have any advice that'd be greatly appreciated. Much love.

Hey so tomorrow is gonna be my 28th birthday. I've really struggled over recent years and become pretty reclusive. I'm trying to fix it, I'm moving to the city before the year is out and I'm going to try and find social circles that work for me, but tomorrow feels particularly sharp for some reason.

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I'm off work for a couple days at least but I don't even have a plan to do anything. I can't just spend the day in the house, it'll make me feel worse so I thought I'd come here to ask what to do.

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This community has always been lovely to me so I really appreciate your reading and any advice you have. Much love.

I'm a 27 year old guy and I just... I can't help but feel like there's something so deeply wrong with me. I can't help but feel like I'm an inconvenience.

I've always been really introverted. I never really fit in at school so I slowly became more and more internal. Eventually developed anxiety issues and would skip school so often that continuing became untenable. I worked my way back up, found something else and got into University. It solved my career troubles but never the fear. During my anxiety booms in school I got bullied a lot. One time a teacher lambasted me for not doing my homework in front of the whole class when I was 16 or so. I couldn't help it and just started crying. The teacher later found out about my anxiety issues and she apologised and tried to help support me, but it couldn't undo the way the other kids saw me.

I ended up developing a chip on my shoulder about my peers. Felt like everyone who wasn't a close friend (and I didn't have many close friends) would automatically hate me.

Later, during COVID, a friend who'd stuck by me throughout that time decided to end our friendship. Said I was too annoying and needy. It only made my fears worse. Ended up spending the entire first half of the 2020's in a deeply reclusive state after that. Living with my parents, earning money to spend on video games and movie subscriptions and not much else.

In 2025 I decided it had to change. I lost a load of weight, begun saving for my own home and signed up for a few dating apps. While I never had much success it felt nice to just... Feel out there. The ultimate aim though was to restart my social life. I tried joining a friends Padel club but... It just made me feel more weird. Everyone was so extroverted and I felt so out of practice. Eventually I quit, I didn't enjoy it at all.

I'm starting to become worried that I'm just too fragile. I'm worried my friend was right and I am annoying and needy. I feel like no one could ever have the patience to want to deal with someone so high maintenance as me. My dad constantly tells me I need to man up. My sister once tried to set me up with her friend, but when I said I didn't really know her so didnt feel comfortable agreeing to a date there and then, my sister nuked the whole idea and told the girl she could "do a lot better than [me] anyway." I feel like I am not conductive to having good relationships with others... But every day is miserable because I'm so lonely.

I've tried therapy and it helped somewhat... But my therapist can't exactly just plop me in a room with like-minded safe people... What the fuck do I do...?